I shuddered. “What would it take to lose you?”
“To be disappointed again?”
— “To abasemently change.” I replied.
𝘈 𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘐 𝘢𝘴𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘢𝘴 𝘐 𝘴𝘪𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘯 𝘤𝘰𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘦 & 𝘫𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘴.
Learned a new word today as I was searching for an adjective to describe the emotion of abandoning yourself to change for another or some thing for this blog.
𝚗𝚘𝚞𝚗: 𝚊𝚋𝚊𝚜𝚎𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝
𝟷. 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚘𝚛 𝚏𝚊𝚌𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚑𝚞𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚒𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚘𝚛 𝚍𝚎𝚐𝚛𝚊𝚍𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗. 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚝𝚎 𝚘𝚛 𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚍𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚘𝚏 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚗𝚛𝚎𝚍𝚞𝚌𝚎𝚍 𝚒𝚗 𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚔, 𝚘𝚏𝚏𝚒𝚌𝚎, 𝚛𝚎𝚙𝚞𝚝𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗, 𝚎𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚖𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗.
My biggest fears used to be failure & getting fat.
Now, at 40, my biggest fear
abandoning myself.
I did when I was younger (along with struggling with obesity, bulimia, & Crohn’s disease) resulting in decades of pain (physically & mentally).
Funny
I wouldn’t change a thing because that mess, my storybook, has made the woman writing these words for you.
Words in hopes of by sharing my story & things I’ve learned that you can live your best life, one that nourishes your body, mind & soul.
Here’s your permission
do things your way.
When you’re being yourself & living authentically, sink into how fucking good that feels while you sit back & watch everything fall into alignment
Life is like beautifully constructed architecture. If designed well, it works! It stands with regal command.
It’s not vanilla.
It’s like exquisite, intimate, passionate sex that’s better with the lights on
(𝘉𝘭𝘶𝘴𝘩? 
𝘎𝘰𝘰𝘥. 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐’𝘮 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵
)
Make space for that shit.
Oxox Coach K
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