Body Image & Disordered Eating – Page 3

June 6, 2023

5 Psychological Reasons You Hate Your Body & Don’t Feel Confident

All you need to know…

I tried every program possible to get in shape in my 20s & 30s, & I still looked & felt like sh*t.

I constantly had ‘projects’. Big Plans.

Keto for 6 weeks. Crash diet for 3 months. Cold showers for… well I didn’t last long with that one, to be honest. Brrrr.

After 40 your mind & body start arguing with you a little. You realize 99% of people struggle to do things that can’t be found in their social media feeds, meal plans, cookie cutter bs fitness stuff, & Google searches.

The secrets come from within. Check out this video with Serena at Carnivore Revolution!

In the video we talk:⁣
– Your relationship with food, exercise, & self
– Being a moderator vs abstainer
– Crossfit, training & workouts
– Trigger foods & tracking food⁣, macros
-What I drink & eat
-High fat vs high protein carnivore
-Meat bars & recipes
-Tips to help anyone wanting to change their health
-Gut issues, gut healing, Crohn’s disease, disordered eating
-Judgment, criticism, worrying about what other people think of you
-Social media triggers, food pushers
And more!

If you want to feel more confident, work to identify & eliminate these confidence-killing, progress smashing habits:

Avoiding emotions & reassurance-seeking
Second-guessing yourself
Constantly catastrophizing & thinking negatively
Dwelling on the past, mistakes, & failures
Avoiding fear & feeling unsafe

Each week, I create blogs & content with simple, practical tips for building emotional & physical health & wellbeing. I truly hope these have helped you create a better human!

All resources, links, & guides live in the link in my Instagram bio, highlights, blog at lilbitoffit.com, & YouTube! You can also subscribe to my private email list!

I enjoy sharing my experiences & knowledge. Thank you to all who read, engage, & have become a part of my digital family!

oxox Coach K

weight loss before and after katie kelly carnivore — You can read about my healing & weight loss journey here!

23 Simple Rules to Transform Your Fitness & Health in order to live your best life! girl with barbell deadlifts in gym

Rules To Live Your Best Life including my daily routine to help you create your own!

It comes down to your habits

Here’s how most people think about their lack of confidence:

I’d be more confident & successful if I lost 20 lbs…
If only I had more money I’d be happier…
If my parents had really loved me then I’d feel more confident & secure in my relationships…
If I had more time I could focus on my fitness…

Fortunately, they’re wrong.

Of course, everything from genetics to childhood experience has some influence on how confident you feel (or don’t). But by far the biggest influence on confidence is the one everyone seems to miss…

It’s your habits in the present, not the events of your past, that determine your confidence.

In my work as a nutrition coach & taking care of patients for over 18 years in the healthcare industry, I’ve found that there are a handful of confidence-killing habits people fall into without knowing it. And it’s these habits that are the real causes of chronically low confidence, body hate, & unhappiness with life. If you can learn to identify & work through them, you’ll find that your natural levels of confidence & life satisfaction are much higher than you realize.

Why you over eat & self sabotage

1. You’re addicted to avoiding emotions & reassurance

Reassurance-seeking is like outsourcing emotional labor onto other people. And not only does it kill your confidence, it also tends to sabotage your relationships & lead to people becoming resentful of you.

Food & healthy emotional navigation are medicine. They can stabilize you & also throw you off. I’ve observed in over 18 years of working in healthcare & nutrition, overeating, body hate, & food addictions are common among those who avoid &/or numb emotions & are constantly seeking reassurance & outside validation.

Food addiction is a biggie. Frequently, the specific addiction is to sugar or carbohydrates, which is a huge reason I adopted the “carnivore” WOE (way of eating) for both my Crohn’s disease & disordered eating. I’ve lost 55lbs & put my Crohn’s & bulimia in med-free remission for over 4 years.

Avoiding painful feelings always makes them worse in the end. When you immediately run away from your emotional difficulties, you’re teaching your brain that you’re afraid of feeling bad & can’t handle it on your own. This means the next time you feel afraid you’re going to feel doubly afraid and not confident to deal with it, oftentimes seeking numbing through food, drugs, alcohol, spending, & using other people.

A helpful survival guide

Tips that have helped me to eat well, stay fit, & release negativity before self sabotaging & over eating:

Breathe: When you feel stress, immediately focus on breathing slowly & deeply. This releases negative energy. Holding your breath out of fear traps toxicity in your body.

Hydrate: Water purifies you. Drink filtered or spring water, especially when you’ve been exposed to negative energy & have the urge to overeat. Consume at least 1/2 your body weight in oz daily. Get in adequate electrolytes. Take a bath or shower. Water washes away impurities of all kinds.

Minimize Sugar & Processed Food As Much As Possible: Although you may crave carbs & sugar (as well as alcohol), they will destabilize you mentally & physically. This makes you more susceptible to absorbing unwanted energy & self sabotaging. These kinds of hyperpalatable foods are like drugs, leaving you wanting more.

Prioritize Protein: Protein stabilizes. It gives a sense of grounding & satiation. Get protein at every meal, at least 30-50g. Big reason many food addicts thrive, lose weight, & heal on carnivore.

Rest: Sleep. Remove yourself from your busy routine. Regularly unplug. We stay stuck in the in-between, dissatisfied & seeking something to make us feel better. Solitude is your best friend. Go take a walk in nature. Eat alone & mindfully especially if you’re an empath.

Restore & Release: Part of the human condition is that we come with soul wounds, past trauma, & conditioning. Our job is to heal & reintegrate the perceived “unlovable” parts of ourselves so we can live connected to Self, Source, & each other. The parts of yourself that you’re angry or ashamed of are the source of your suffering. Therapy does wonders!

Move: Walk, go to the gym, get sunlight, connect with friends. We cope with stress, including loneliness, by using dopamine-triggering substances & behaviors as a means of avoiding painful emotions & self-awareness. But if we make a commitment to living a kick-ass life, then moving the body will get the dopamine flowing, reconnecting us to what we truly enjoy, like our friends & families. Oh, and that workout high & lookin good nekkid too!!

Second-guessing & perfectionism

2. You second-guess yourself constantly

Each time you second-guess yourself, it’s a tiny message to your brain that you don’t believe in yourself. If you’re in the habit of constantly second-guessing yourself, think about what you’re teaching your brain?

If every time a big decision arrives your immediate reaction is to tell your brain you’re not capable of making big decisions, how confident can you expect to feel the next time a big decision comes around?

Look, it’s obviously important to be thoughtful before making decisions — especially big ones with major consequences and lots of uncertainty.

But it’s also important to accept that you will never eliminate uncertainty entirely. This means there will always be a chance you make the wrong decision, but they’re just lessons that help make you a better, more well-equipped version of yourself.

The heart of second-guessing is the unwillingness to accept the fundamental uncertainty of life. Chronic second-guessing is a form of perfectionism where you feel like no matter how hard you work, the result is never good enough because it’s not perfect. If you want to feel more confident, you need to make your peace with uncertainty & accept the responsibility of making decisions & being unattached from the outcome.

Managing your inner narrative

3. You constantly catastrophize & think negatively

Catastrophizing is an extreme form of worry where you quickly start thinking about all the worst case scenarios…

Oh my God, I’m gonna gain 10 lbs if I lift & eat more…
Great, I’m gonna lose my job. How will I be able to make rent? What will other people think?
I can’t wear that… they probably think I’m poor or ugly, etc…

The ability to imagine the worst case scenario can be a good thing in the appropriate time & place if you can emotionally navigate thru the therapeutic process to shift your mindset to one of safety, power, & security. But if you’re in the habit of always catastrophizing, not only will it chip away at your confidence in your ability to handle difficulties in the future — it’s also going to make you incredibly anxious & stressed to the titties all the time.

If you’re constantly telling yourself the world is ending, you’re going to constantly feel like the world is ending. And it’s awfully hard to feel confident when you’re always worried that disaster is right around the corner.

“Instead of worrying about what you cannot control, shift your energy to what you can create.” Roy T. Bennett

Embrace failures as lessons

4. You dwell on past mistakes

Just like it’s hard to feel confident if you’re always predicting that disaster is about to strike, it’s similarly hard to feel confident if you’re constantly reminding yourself of your mistakes & “failures.”

Healthy reflection is a good & normal thing. Which means some degree of thinking back on your mistakes in an attempt to learn from them is very useful — even confidence-boosting!

But if you’re habitually reminding yourself of past mistakes well past the point of new learning, it’s all side effect & no benefit. You’re keeping your shame & insecurity high & your confidence & self-worth low.

It’s hard to feel confident about the future when you won’t let go of the past.

The trick is that you have to be willing to live with the fact that the past is unchangeable, which means you are truly helpless to change it.

More often than not, incessant rumination about the past is a sign that you haven’t really confronted that helplessness & learned to embrace it o make better decisions. Your low confidence & life dissatisfaction are unfortunate casualties of that denial.

“To think too much is a disease.” Fyodor Dostoyevsky

Stop avoiding fear

5. You’re afraid of feeling unsafe & afraid

The American President Franklin Roosevelt famously said: The only thing we have to fear is fear itself. And while his political and economic policies aren’t something I’m qualified to comment on, as a statement of human psychology, that quote is pretty right on the mark.

Because here’s the thing: The fear that keeps your confidence low doesn’t come from the thing itself, but from the feelings about it.

Why do you think many people drink before giving speeches/toasts or going on dates? Alcohol doesn’t make you more articulate or attractive. Alcohol makes you feel confident because it gets rid of your fear & inhibitions & lets your natural confidence shine through (at the right dosage, anyway 🙂

In any situation where you lack confidence & feel afraid or unsafe, there’s a good chance the real obstacle is your relationship with fear & specific triggers. If you want to feel more confident, start to cultivate a healthier relationship with your fear. Start acknowledging it & validating it instead of trying to avoid it. Remember: Confident people don’t escape fear. They master it.

“The soul becomes dyed with the color of its thoughts.” Marcus Aurelius

bio carnivore lilbitoffit katie kelly indiana fishers — Hailing from Fishers, Indiana, Katie is an aficionado of health, mindset, human connection, & entrepreneurship. Motivational writer, speaker, doer of many things, she grew up on her family’s beef cattle & crop farm where agriculture was her first love. She is a Purdue University graduate well known for her storytelling of life lessons & personal transformation through her own relationships, financial struggles, Crohn’s Disease, disordered eating, body transformation, & adapting to a carnivore diet lifestyle.

Katie also has over 18 years experience as a Registered Radiologic Technologist, Nutritionist, Brand Growth & Sales Consultant. She works with people of all walks of life as a nutritionist & life coach to help them authentically optimize their lives to find health, wealth, & happy!

You can catch her via Instagram @lil_bit_of_fit & blog, Lilbitoffit.com

June 2, 2023

The Hard Truths About Body Fat % & Getting Lean Af

My body shivered as I undressed & stepped on the scale.
I looked at the number. Shit.

But I’m different now. I’m better. I don’t read Anorexia blogs, starve myself, or equate my weight with my self-worth anymore. Yet, a tiny thought crosses my mind. “Just five more,” it whispers. “Imagine how powerful you’d feel. Maybe then you’d actually like yourself.”

Instead of glorifying shredded abs & single digit body fat, I’m speaking up. In a society that pressures us to look a certain way, I know others share my past struggle.
Yeah, they’re the parts of me I’m not proud of, but understanding them changed my life.

I used to believe that starving was an art, bare bones were beautiful, & I was an artist.

I’d try & mold my body to match the models on TV & in the magazines. I worked hard to paint the emptiness I felt inside.

When I was in 3rd grade, I got the honor of being ‘the fat kid.’ This event might not sound like a big deal to some, but to 8-year-old me, it was traumatic. Food became my enemy. My stomach hurt all the time, too. Later on in life to be diagnosed with Crohn’s Disease. My poor relationships with food (specifically binging on carbs & sugar) & body image exacerbated.

At the beginning of 7th grade, we did weigh-ins. When it was my turn to stand on the scale, my health teacher made a frowny face at the numbers & pulled me aside. I was informed I was 160lbs & obese at 5ft tall.

My cheeks burned, & tears streamed from my eyes as I was lectured about exercising & eating less.

And by my senior year of high school, I was a mastermind of my craft. I learned how to eat just enough to keep me from binging or passing out.

Losing weight was like a drug — each time I stood on the scale, dopamine rushed into my brain, & I forgot all my problems.

Getting smaller also gave me a sense of power — & I loved it. I loved feeling “better” than everyone else because I was the ‘perfect’ anorexic & bulimic.

No matter how skinny I became, I couldn’t get rid of my problems. My weight yoyo’d over the years. I was fading away from my life; I was lonely, miserable, & sick. I burned bridges in relationships because of my constant irritability, fatigue, gut issues, & obsession with losing weight.

While I’d been chasing the ‘high’ & power, there were other feelings, a deeper longing, that I needed to acknowledge. Helplessness & self hate.

From my struggles came my strengths & my passion for helping others. My awesomeness comes from being myself — from writing, speaking my truth, & kindling the potential energy within me.

We are all artists; we’re sculptors & painters, creators of our dreams, poets of our memories. Let our hands mold our ambitions, not our appearances. Because it is there where we find our true power!

oxox Coach K

Like this Blog? Join my email list & follow along on the gram for all the life & resources to help you! Link Here

May 19, 2023

A Disturbing Lesson Everyone Should Learn Before 40

Confessions from a former sick, overweight, broke bitch who had no fucking idea what cadence meant. [𝘏𝘪. 𝘐𝘵 𝘮𝘦. 👋]

I remember hearing someone say cadence for the first time in a mastermind. I sat there as the tidal wave of shame washed over me.

I thought, “I have no fucking idea what that means. I don’t belong here. I’m not as “good” as these people.”

Anyone else experience this feeling of shame? Feeling they should know something or be at a particular point in life & not be there?

𝐂𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘭𝘰𝘸 𝘰𝘳 𝘳𝘩𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘮 𝘰𝘧 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴, 𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴 & 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘯.

In my own words, I would say cadence is the lattice (or path) by which we live life.

Everyone has a cadence in their life.

Two questions that PING💥 punched me in the gut:

👉“Is my cadence life-giving or is it exhausting?”

👉“Does it allow me to flourish & thrive or does it leave me overwhelmed?”

Commanding your cadence…

brings chaos into order

turns hopes into habits

provides flexibility within structure

is critical to choose the reality of your life.

This is the beauty: you get to choose the cadence of your life. No one gets to choose it for you.

As you begin to do this & be intentional & live this way, what you will find is there’s actually an optimalcadence for you.

There are elements that allow you to find the optimal cadence for your own life. Every priority or event has its own optimal cadence (flow/priority of importance/repeatability).

For example, brushing your teeth is a cadence that needs to be more frequent. If you’re going a week without brushing your teeth, we have problems.

Eating & sleeping WELL & working out (SHOULD BE) top priority cadences effortlessly repeated, because they make us our healthiest, happiest, best selves, which transitions into every facet of our lives.

Then there are other shades of cadence that are less frequent: Visiting family or friends across the country or things like indulging in a luxurious vacation.

They’re both priorities.

They both matter, but the optimal cadence for them is different.

A second point is that everyone’s individual cadence is unique to them, just like diets, workouts, relationships, movies, etc.

Each of us has different temperaments, needs, preferences, love languages, etc — wirings.

Some of you might be morning people like me. Early birds. I am a morning person. I love it when it’s dark & quiet. I love watching the sun come up. I get most of my channeled messages and ideas early in the morning while walking. Some people hate that.

Some people are night owls & they produce their best work late at night after everybody’s asleep.

Sometimes work obligations can affect your optimal cadence. For some folks & families, especially people who work in healthcare or sales/business who travel a lot, they might have an on-call schedule or crazy work schedule.

In this case, your optimal cadence as a human or family might have to look different because you know on a weekend you’re not going to get friends & family time. You’re going to have to prioritize that differently earlier in the week to ensure you have time with your kids & spouse & friends because of the fact that your on call schedule or travel is going to be disruptive.

Lastly, every season can have a different optimal cadence.

Right now, I’m healthy & strong living in maintenance, focused on longevity & just being happy.

I haven’t had a Crohn’s flare in four years since changing my diet & lifestyle. [𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘤𝘶𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘢 𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘐𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘮 𝘣𝘪𝘰 & 𝘩𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘴, 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘨𝘨𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘸𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘴, 𝘨𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘶𝘦𝘴, & 𝘢 𝘱𝘰𝘰𝘳 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘱 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘧𝘰𝘰𝘥 & 𝘣𝘰𝘥𝘺 𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘦.] You can find that here

There was a time I was very sick, very broke, very lonely, & I had to adjust my life to heal those parts of myself.

There was a time I was a competitive CrossFit athlete & had to eat & live differently.

There was a time I was training for a photo shoot in a fat loss cut & had to eat & live differently.

There was a time I was severely in debt, had no idea what my purpose in life was & I lived differently then, too.

All these seasons were confusing & hard as fuck & came with their own sets of lessons, pros & cons.

One idea as you’re beginning to think through cadences in your own life can be to study others around you.

Especially those that you admire or have learned from ahead of you in life.

Remember the truth, you choose the cadence of your life. No one can give it to you. You get to choose.

I’m going to share a few of my personal cadences. I posted my bulletproof daily routine on IG to help y’all see how I prioritize my life so that you can create your own success, routine. You can find that here

These are just examples, this isn’t to say it’s for you, because again, your cadence is unique to you. Hopefully some of the ones I’m sharing here can help you think about things differently in your life.

My cadences are:

Gratitude, Positive Affirmations, & a Walk first thing in the morning. They help me align physically & mentally for my day. They put my mental filter, my heart filter, & my physical filter for the day in the right place.

Right after that I sit in silence or listen to a nourishing podcast while I eat my meaty breakfast in front of my red light. Then I use my infrared sauna. (All resources, guides, products, & discount codes are here in the link in my IG bio)

Sitting in silence after having slept & walking are some of the best processing times for me contemplating what has happened & contemplating what’s ahead.

After the work day, I mentally recap what I did well & what I could do better. I also give thanks for doing my best & remind myself that I live by the Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz.

P. S. read that book.

[𝘈𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴: 𝘉𝘦 𝘐𝘮𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘤𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘞𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘞𝘰𝘳𝘥, 𝘋𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘛𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘈𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘗𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺, 𝘋𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘔𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘈𝘴𝘴𝘶𝘮𝘱𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴. 𝘈𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴𝘋𝘰 𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘉𝘦𝘴𝘵.]

I also write & create every day.

I eat well & move my body every day.

I pray & give gratitude every single day.

I touch base with my family & close circle every week.

I challenge myself & do something new &/or put myself in a different environment every week.

I make saving & investing my time, energy, & money wisely a daily game so that it’s fun & easy for me so that I have more financial & personal wealth.

Notice there’s different timings we talked earlier about different priorities that have different optimal cadences, & that’s what structure here shows.

With structure comes freedom & flexibility because you’re strong in your foundation & what you believe & stand for.

It’s not overly complicated. You don’t have to have it all perfect at once. You just need to start. For me, there’s daily, weekly, monthly, quarterly, bi-annual, & annual cadences.

Why is commanding your cadence so critical to choose & create the reality of your life?

The first is commanding your cadence facilitates your habits. Habits are some of the most powerful elements of our life. There was a Duke researcher in 2006, who did this large study around habits. What he found was that greater than 40% of the actions that we take in a single day are out of habit.

Think about that for a second…GREATER than 40% of the actions you take are out of habit! You do them by default.

You did them because you did them before. When you command your cadence, you facilitate your habits.

The second point about why commanding your cadence is critical is it protects your priorities.

Life comes at us. Life circumstances inevitably will derail us.

If we don’t have a cadence, we’re going to become aimless. We’re going to drift off course from our purpose. You can be listless in life but having command of your cadence actually serves you to get back on track towards your purpose.

Here’s a couple application questions to think about this weekend & into this next week:

👉What priority in my life do I need to command its cadence?

👉Who do I admire in life that I can learn one new cadence from?

As you reflect on those questions, begin to take command of your cadence. When you do, you will begin to live life on purpose. Your body will change for the better, your relationships will change for the better, your finances will change for the better, your sense of inner peace & health will change for the better.

As you become purpose driven, you will live a more FULL & MEANINGFUL life. Remember, you are in control of your cadences in life. What are you going to choose?

oxox Coach K

Hailing from Fishers, Indiana, Katie is an aficionado of health, mindset, human connection, & entrepreneurship. Motivational writer, speaker, doer of many things, she grew up on her family’s beef cattle & crop farm where agriculture was her first love. She is a Purdue University graduate well known for her storytelling of life lessons & personal transformation through her own relationships, financial struggles, Crohn’s Disease, disordered eating, CrossFit, & adapting a carnivore diet lifestyle.

Katie also has over 17 years experience as a Registered Radiologic Technologist, Nutritionist, & Sales Consultant. She works with people of all walks of life as a nutritionist & personal life coach to help them authentically optimize their lives to find health, wealth, & happy!

You can catch her via Instagram @lil_bit_of_fit & blog, Lilbitoffit.com

May 17, 2023July 17, 2023

The Stupidly Simple System I Use to Stay in Shape And Love My Body As An Empath At Age 40

Yeah but whadda YOU do?!

I get that question from folks all the time, in person & online, when asked to give advice about getting in shape, protecting energy, & preventing self sabotage.

I lay out a really simple, low-maintenance approach. It’s true — I don’t put much effort into all this health & fitness stuff. What I do, I do week-in, week-out, though. And it all starts with self awareness, self love, & frankly, not giving a f*ck what other people think or do.

So yes, over several decades, I have put in A TON of effort in total. It’s taken over 10 years to build the body y’all see today. But day-to-day, not so much. BECAUSE I’ve made it a lifestyle. I eat plenty of food (around 2000 cal/d on avg) & still enjoy occasional social alcohol in moderation.

The Stupidly Simple System I Use to Stay in Shape & love my body as an empath at age 40 — Read about my gut healing, weight loss, & carnivore story here!

I want you to look & feel fabulous as you get older, too, so strap yourself in for a typical, really low-maintenance week for me (that you can copy or use as inspiration) that helps me stay lean & healthy as an empath at 40.

Mapped out my daily routine here just for you in this IG post!

I Train for 5 Hours a Week, Tops

“Ah but you’re a nutritionist & single & have no kids, you can work out all the time if you want to?!”

Yeah, I could…but why the f*ck would I want to?

I’ve been working out for 30 years — believe me, the novelty wore off long ago. Nowadays, workouts are like vacuuming for me — a necessary thing I need to get done so things don’t get messy & I feel my best. We all wanna look good nekkid too!

I workout out for 4-5 sessions of 40–60 mins a week [depends if I get side-tracked by that work thing or extracurricular activities between sessions 🙂 ] Every muscle group gets hit with a wee dose of damage because I am too damn old to waddle around for days after some hardcore leg day or CrossFit workout. Upper body push/pull days & lower body glute/leg splits. Schedule varies with work schedule. (Routines, guides, & resources in link in IG bio)

I Walk 15k Steps/d As A Target

Walking Is a True Health Hack. I have no desire to run at a medium pace for an hour or do hours of CrossFit WOD’s a day anymore, messing up my joints & hormones. If I need to get somewhere 5 miles away, I’ll drive. Thanks.

But I do plenty of brisk walking — 15k steps per day is my target. This has enormous payoffs on several levels:

Low-impact stamina-building.
Vitamin D for hormonal balance cuz I walk outside in the sun.
Clears my head & energy like nothing else does.
Torches tons of calories per week.

Takeaway for You

If you hate a particular exercise, please don’t force yourself to do it — there’s more than one way to skin a cat.

Walking is fantastic. Also, I have no idea how many calories cat skinning burns <opens Google>.

I Take & Use a Few Things To Thrive

You can easily find yourself taking handfuls of pills & powders daily because you think they’ll magically solve all your problems. They won’t if you don’t have your foundational success routine in place first. If you’re eating a varied & healthy diet (for YOU) & exercising, you don’t need to supplement with much at all.

There are a few things I take & use that help me thrive. You can find these along with discount codes in the link in my IG bio & highlights.

Complete Biohacking guide here!

Biohacking that helped me instantly feel better & reverse aging

Nuethix Cort-Eaze for hormonal balance, cortisol control, & sleep. Nuethix Products discount code: lilbitoffit

Nuethix Medipure DS & Gourmet Greens for multivitamin support & detox support

Nuethix Utilyze digestive enzymes prior to meals for better digestion & absorption

Nuethix GDA-Max before large meals &/or meals with carbs for better digestion, blood sugar control, & nutrient partitioning

EMR-TEK Red Light Therapy & Blue Block Glasses – discount code: lilbitoffit20

Infrared sauna – got mine off Amazon

Takeaway for You

If you’re taking tons of shit, do an audit & ask yourself, “What happens if I stop taking this?” If the answer is “nothing,” then save your $$

I Eat 2 Meals & Nothing I Don’t Like

I want to maintain my weight while eating enough to build a wee bit more muscle if I can. This means I aim to eat at my maintenance level in total each week. Use the TDEEcalculator.net to find yours.

I do what works for me, which is a form of intermittent fasting every day in windows that suit my work & social schedule.

coffee & plenty of water + Ultima Replenisher electrolytes
a big breakfast of protein & healthy fats after my walk or workout in the morning
a smaller meaty meal mid-late afternoon
fast overnight until the next day usually 12-18 hrs. No snacking
throw in occasional a large OMAD (one meal a day) on days I work a 1st shift & then a 3rd shift or if I’m just not as hungry

I don’t eat kale — it’s gross. I don’t eat veggies, fruit or fiber because I can’t break them down due to my Crohn’s disease (my whole story is documented in the link in my IG bio & highlights). Carbs & sugar I have a really shitty relationship with so I abstain. I don’t eat any food “because it’s healthy”, I eat what healthy food I like because I like it.

Takeaway for You

Start with the healthy foods you like. Base meals on those. Keep protein high for muscle retention & satiety. Avoid trigger foods, sugar, & junk.

Post workout breakfast. 1.25 lbs of *0% ground beef #meatbars Airfry. 380. 12 minutes. Did not consume the fat in the bottom of the airfyer to make it leaner.

My Weekends Are Never A Shit Show

You could get in great shape if you gave up sugar, alcohol, & junk food & ate only grilled chicken & broccoli for meals for 12 weeks straight. But you’d also hate life & everyone around you, & after 12 weeks, you would probably binge off the rails.

80-90% for Health. 20-10% for Flexibility

Instead of quick fix, masochistic approaches to dieting, we can lose body fat & stay lean intentionally managing calories & eating healthy foods the majority of the time, say Monday to Friday, or 80-90% of the time, meaning things like:

High protein breakfasts (eggs, bacon, sausage, etc)
High protein lunches/dinner (meat, seafood, eggs, etc)
No-minimal sugar & snacks between meals (2-3 meals/day)
Intermittent fasting overnight (12-16+ hours) Do what works for you as far as eating windows.
Use carbs (fruit, veggies, oats, rice, etc) intentionally. Typically the more active, the more you tolerate. If they cause issues mentally & physically, you may do better abstaining.
If you like weekend/social flexibility, use wisely.

Takeaway for You

Controlling your weight long term: control portions & eat your protein. Remind yourself what makes you feel your best mentally & physically.

Health & Fitness Tips As An Empath

Tips that have helped me to eat well, stay fit, & release negativity before self sabotaging & over eating:

Minimize Sugar & Processed Food As Much As Possible: Although you may crave carbs & sugar (as well as alcohol), they will destabilize you mentally & physically. This makes you more susceptible to absorbing unwanted energy & self sabotaging. These kinds of hyperpalatable foods are like drugs, leaving you wanting more.

Prioritize Protein: Protein stabilizes everyone. It gives a sense of grounding & satiation. Get protein at every meal, at least 30g. Big reason many food addicts thrive, lose weight, & heal on carnivore.

Rest: Sleep. Solitude is your best friend to energetically rest & reset. Go take a restorative walk in nature.

Eat Alone & Mindfully: most of us empaths need to avoid outside energy & distractions when eating. It allows us to have full presence, chew thoroughly & savor our food which helps us feel true hunger & satiety cues. This aids in avoiding over eating & thus weight gain.

Manage Your Emotions, Time, & Energy: Managing your emotions actually frees up the energy you’re spending on things that do not serve you. Emotions are messengers. They alert you to boundaries being crossed. If you’re like I was, that is what made me want to stuff my face with donuts, cookies, cake, chips, cereal, crackers, & ice cream & then throw it up. I was suppressing emotions & giving my time & energy to everyone else. UNTIL I realized that self loathing & sabotaging behavior meant staying sick, broke, & lonely AF.

Move Your Body: Walk, go to the gym, get out in the sunlight, connect with friends. We cope with stress, including loneliness, by using dopamine-triggering substances & behaviors as a means of avoiding painful emotions & self-awareness. But if we make a commitment to living a kick-ass life, then moving the body will get the dopamine flowing, reconnecting us to what we truly enjoy, like our friends & families. I will reiterate again, walking is a GODsend. If in doubt, go walk!

Final Thoughts

Most of adult life isn’t about finding new answers, but unravelling the web of misinformation we pick up over the years.

Here’s the truth about exercise & eating well — it’s a lot simpler than it sounds. The more you eat well & exercise, the stronger you’ll get, the better you’ll feel, and, the more you’ll enjoy it. Then it becomes you & your lifestyle.

When people ask my fitness regimen & I respond with “I workout 4-5x per week for 45-60 minutes & walk 15k steps per day.”…I get, “I could NEVER find time for that!” or “How long do you have to do this for? Are you losing fat or on a diet?”

I shake my damn head. Because, society has programmed us that exercise & eating healthy are short-term things to lose weight for an event or to fit into clothes – not a LIFESTYLE.

Like reps & weight, they’re merely tools to build a fulfilling life. On their own, they’re meaningless. I started counting intentional moments & habits. I no longer log hours of workouts a day, binge & restrict food from a place of self loathing, or find myself obsessed with chasing a smaller body. You can’t live a BIG life chasing a SMALL body on an EMPTY tank & TIRED soul.

oxox Coach K

May 15, 2023

If You’re An Empath And Struggle With Weight Loss And Food Addiction You Need To Read This

Lost & found are from the same box. I’m an empath. A highly sensitive person when it comes to environments, emotions & other peoples’ energies. I like to eat alone.
Maybe you can relate too.

I spent decades with food triggers, gut issues, constipation, bloating, G.I. bleeding, unexplained weight gain & disordered eating.

empath weight loss before and after — I’ve lost 55lbs and put my Crohn’s Disease and bulimia in med-free remission via the carnivore diet.

I grew up hearing shit like this:

“You’re just too big to be a cheerleader, hon.” -cheerleading coach, middle school

“Pretty girls are in the front, you’re in the back.” -a mom, childhood birthday party pictures

“Well, you’re just not polished enough.” -recruiter, job fair in college

“I’m sorry I cheated, I like you, it’s just, she was prettier.”
-someone not even worth mentioning here LOL!

Naturally I’d be lying if a part of me didn’t want to tell these people of past chapters of my life they can suck it

People will teach you how to love well by hurting you. They will teach you how to love yourself by not loving you back. Life will teach you evolution & growth thru pain & stagnation.

Hell, crispy airfryer #meatbars were discovered by me being late to work & literally throwin the shizzle my nizzle in the airfryer basket.

meat bars lilbitoffit katie kelly carnivore

This world is made up of a plethora of different people with different priorities with different life situations all 50 shades of f*cked up.

You’re not alone, the difference is how you react to what life throws at you.

Here are things I do & had to learn to do throughout my journey to be my healthiest. They often times are perceived as being rude for those who don’t understand special digestive needs or people who are extremely highly sensitive & empathetic.

The hard truth is, it’s hard to learn to love yourself for being different. So let’s raise awareness on this especially if you’re stuck in self sabotaging cycles!

I’ve lost 55lbs and put my Crohn’s Disease and bulimia in med-free remission via the carnivore diet.

Empaths Are Prone To Addictions

My Take?
Empaths are more prone to addictive behaviors. More importantly, what can we do about the unproductive behaviors, habits, & addictions we struggle with?

We literally feel what others are feeling, which can be a good thing — or not so much. When it’s good it’s fucking great! In fact we amplify those high-vibe emotions which is why so many people seek us out for support.

The downside, it seems, is that we absorb “negative” or low-vibrational emotions. Emotions are energy vibrating at different frequencies, by the way. Joy and love, for example, are high-vibe while guilt and shame are low-vibe. These vibrations impact our vitality, our mental state & quality of life.

When we don’t know how to effectively & efficiently process all that energy, we act out or we hold it in. Neither is healthy. When we hold it in, sometimes that takes the shape of a physical illness & other times it’s mental. Either way that shit gets stored somewhere — in our bodies or our brains.

We then have a toxic build up of low-vibe emotions stored in our entire being, making us feel like crap.

Why Empaths Over Eat

Food is medicine. It can stabilize your sensitive system, but it can also throw it off. I’ve observed in my 18 years of working in healthcare & as a nutrition coach as well as in myself, that overeating & food addictions are common among empaths.

Food addiction is an uncontrollable craving for excess food for which many diets & weight loss programs often don’t succeed. Frequently, the specific addiction is to sugar or carbohydrates, which is a BIG reason I adopted the “carnivore” WOE (way of eating) for both my Crohn’s disease & disordered eating. I’ve lost 55lbs & put my Crohn’s & bulimia in med-free remission for over 4 years.

Excess weight can be a way of armoring yourself to stop absorbing other people’s stress or disturbing behavior. Putting on added pounds can make you feel more grounded, & it can act as a buffer against negativity. But reaching for junk foods for a quick fix, is a short-lived & unhealthy solution that gets addictively repeated.

Diets often fail for sensitive people because they are unaware that they are eating (& overeating) unhealthy foods to protect themselves from overwhelming or negative energy. When I point this out to my empath clients who are struggling with overeating, it’s a life-changing insight for them.

Are You A Food Empath?

I asked myself these questions to navigate through confusion & find answers & clarity as far as the right diet & coping solutions:

Do you overeat when you are emotionally overwhelmed?
Do you turn to sugar, carbs, & junk food to self-soothe discomfort, boredom, or a difficult emotion?
Are you highly sensitive to the effect people & food have on your body?
Do you get mood swings, brain fog, or feel toxic from sugar, caffeine, sodas, junk food, or specific foods?
Do you have food allergies, gut issues, & intolerances such as to gluten, soy, plants, fiber, artificial ingredients, etc?
Do you feel more protected from stress when you are heavier?
Do you feel energized by healthy, non-processed food?
Are you sensitive to certain foods? Feel better on certain foods?
Do you feel more vulnerable to stress when you are thinner?

If you are an empathic eater, you will need to pinpoint energetic stressors that trigger overeating such as a draining coworker, an argument with a friend or family, kids, or feeling rejected. Train yourself to clear the stress as soon as possible to balance your system. Avoid using food as a numbing coping mechanism. I walk & keep my mind occupied instead.

An Empath’s Survival Guide

Tips that have helped me to eat well, stay fit, & release negativity before self sabotaging & over eating:

Breathe: When you feel stress, immediately focus on breathing slowly & deeply. This releases negative energy. Holding your breath out of fear traps toxicity in your body.

Hydrate: Water purifies you. Drink filtered or spring water, especially when you’ve been exposed to negative energy & have the urge to overeat. Consume at least 1/2 your body weight in oz daily. Get in adequate electrolytes. Take a bath or shower. Water washes away impurities of all kinds.

Minimize Sugar & Processed Food As Much As Possible: Although you may crave carbs & sugar (as well as alcohol), they will destabilize you mentally & physically. This makes you more susceptible to absorbing unwanted energy & self sabotaging. These kinds of hyperpalatable foods are like drugs, leaving you wanting more.

Prioritize Protein: Protein stabilizes everyone. It gives a sense of grounding & satiation. Get protein at every meal, at least 30g. Big reason many food addicts thrive, lose weight, & heal on carnivore.

Rest: Sleep. Remove yourself from your busy routine. Regularly. In his book, Willpower Doesn’t Work, Benjamin P. Hardy talks about “enhanced environments” — one that will have you uber productive & one that will allow you to completely reset. If we don’t give ourselves these two distinct environments, everything blends together & we never really disconnect, nor do we really get satisfying results from our work. We stay stuck in the in-between, dissatisfied & seeking something to make us feel better. Solitude is your best friend. Go take a walk in nature. Eat alone & mindfully.

Restore & Release: Self Love. Where there’s suffering there is a lack of integrity & self love. I’m not talking about moral uprightness here. I’m talking about the state of being whole. Part of the human condition is that we come with soul wounds, past trauma, & conditioning. Our job is to heal & reintegrate the perceived “unlovable” parts of ourselves so we can live connected to Self, Source, & each other. The parts of yourself that you’re angry or ashamed of are the source of your suffering. The whole world is “coping” with this dis-ease. Empaths feel that pain & powerlessness. Seek therapy.

Manage: Your emotions. Your time. Your energy. I know it feels like you don’t have the time or energy so you turn to what’s easy & convenient. Managing your emotions actually frees up the energy you’re spending on things that do not serve you. Emotions are messengers. They alert you to boundaries being crossed. What boundaries of yours are not being honored? Do you even know your boundaries? The lack of knowing & enforcing boundaries is causing you more work, frustration, & stress than you can manage. If you’re like I was, that is what made me want to stuff my face with donuts, cookies, cake, chips, cereal, crackers, & ice cream then throw it up — UNTIL I realized that behavior meant staying sick, broke, & lonely AF.

Move: Your body. Walk, go to the gym, get sunlight, connect with friends. We cope with stress, including loneliness, by using dopamine-triggering substances & behaviors as a means of avoiding painful emotions & self-awareness. But if we make a commitment to living a kick-ass life, then moving the body will get the dopamine flowing, reconnecting us to what we truly enjoy, like our friends & families. Oh, and that workout high & lookin good nekkid too!!

Final Thoughts

Addictions can be distracting or completely destroy your life. Empaths are not meant to be average. Stop trying to be normal. You were born with an extraordinary gift. When you learn to use it, your life will light the fuck up. If you don’t know what your gift (or superpower) is, you are missing out on the best life has for you. You will likely fall into the dark hole of suck to cope with feelings of failure & being misunderstood. Don’t let that happen. If you’re there now, don’t worry, there’s a cure.

I used to be addicted now I am aligned.

My addictive behaviors took on many forms over the years. In my twenties I partied my ass off for close to a decade & wrecked my health.

At one point that fix was tied to the attention of men. Another time I couldn’t get enough shopping. Then there was food, specifically sugar & carbs, that were controlling my life. I was bulimic to boot on top of self hate.

For me, being free of addiction was not possible until I got clear about what I am here to do, how to eat right for me, get healthy, & simply do shit I love. I made a commitment to be the badass I’ve always believed I could be, but now there’s a passion & purpose attached to it.

Food can be a source of energy or depletion. You want to develop dietary & lifestyle habits that serve your sensitivities rather than aggravating them. Then you can maximize the energy you receive from food & people, & environments & minimize the protective defense mechanism of empathic over-eating. With these tools to protect & ground yourself, you won’t have the same cravings that used to undermine your best intentions.

Thank you for reading & I’m honored you allowed me to share my story & add value to your lives!

With love,
Oxox Coach K

All guides, resources, recipe books, coaching & more HERE!

Katie also has over 17 years experience as a Registered Radiologic Technologist, Nutritionist, Brand Growth & Sales Consultant. She works with people of all walks of life as a nutritionist & life coach to help them authentically optimize their lives to find health, wealth, & happy!

You can catch her via Instagram @lil_bit_of_fit & blog, Lilbitoffit.com

May 7, 2023May 7, 2023

My Biggest Fears Used To Be Failure And Getting Fat

I shuddered. “What would it take to lose you?”

“To be disappointed again?”

— “To abasemently change.” I replied.

𝘈 𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘐 𝘢𝘴𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘢𝘴 𝘐 𝘴𝘪𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘯 𝘤𝘰𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘦 & 𝘫𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘴.

Learned a new word today as I was searching for an adjective to describe the emotion of abandoning yourself to change for another or some thing for this blog.

𝚗𝚘𝚞𝚗: 𝚊𝚋𝚊𝚜𝚎𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝

𝟷. 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚘𝚛 𝚏𝚊𝚌𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚑𝚞𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚒𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚘𝚛 𝚍𝚎𝚐𝚛𝚊𝚍𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗. 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚝𝚎 𝚘𝚛 𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚍𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚘𝚏 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚗𝚛𝚎𝚍𝚞𝚌𝚎𝚍 𝚒𝚗 𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚔, 𝚘𝚏𝚏𝚒𝚌𝚎, 𝚛𝚎𝚙𝚞𝚝𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗, 𝚎𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚖𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗.

My biggest fears used to be failure & getting fat.

Now, at 40, my biggest fear👉abandoning myself.

I did when I was younger (along with struggling with obesity, bulimia, & Crohn’s disease) resulting in decades of pain (physically & mentally).

weight loss before and after carnivore lilbitoffit katie kelly — I’ve lost 55lbs & put my bulimia & Crohn’s disease in med-free remission via the Carnivore diet

Funny🤔 I wouldn’t change a thing because that mess, my storybook, has made the woman writing these words for you.

Words in hopes of by sharing my story & things I’ve learned that you can live your best life, one that nourishes your body, mind & soul.

Here’s your permission🎟️👉do things your way.

When you’re being yourself & living authentically, sink into how fucking good that feels while you sit back & watch everything fall into alignment🙏✨ 👐🧿🪬

Life is like beautifully constructed architecture. If designed well, it works! It stands with regal command.🫡🇺🇸🏁

🚫It’s not vanilla.

It’s like exquisite, intimate, passionate sex that’s better with the lights on🔥

(𝘉𝘭𝘶𝘴𝘩? 🙈🙉🙊𝘎𝘰𝘰𝘥. 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐’𝘮 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵😉)

Make space for that shit.

Oxox Coach K

You can find this post here & others just like it on the gram❤️

#sundaychurch #loveindy #mystory #rev2023 #revindy @revindyevent @iuhealthfdn @indianapolismotorspeedway @lisamitchellindy

April 8, 2023

Vulnerability is the way. You were meant to hear these shameful confessions and message today.

MENTAL HEALTH: THE MOST COMMON THOUGHTS & FEELINGS OF SUICIDAL MEN.

One of the bravest things I ever did was own my eating disorder & hate for myself.

One of the bravest acts of faith in myself,
as a person of worth that wasn’t attached to what I looked like or what I achieved, was getting rid of an old pair of Abercrombie jeans that I bought that were two sizes too small.

how carnivore healed my crohn's disease and binge eating — You can read about my gut healing & weight loss story here in this blog!

Because I told myself when I was skinny enough to fit into these jeans, that’s when I would be happy & worthy.

No one wants to be uncomfortable. Everyone wants to be brave but no one wants to be vulnerable.

Vulnerability is not knowing, but doing it anyways out of faith because your heart tells you to.

That’s true bravery & courage.

Being a true leader is being honest about yourself & your life & saying I’m 50 shades of f* led up & I love every bit of it & I’m here to share my story & be vulnerable to help others out there who are too afraid to live the truth of their own lives.

Choose courage over comfort. You cannot be a leader or a luminary without being vulnerable. You can’t have both.

Love & empathy get you through the shame shit storms.

You own your story.
You write your pages.
And by you sharing your life, authentically, you’re giving someone else hope to do the same.

That is being a leader.

I hope you enjoy this message & it meets you where you need ❤️

Oxox Coach K

Guides, Recipes, Coaching, Discount Codes & More HERE!

You can catch her via Instagram @lil_bit_of_fit & blog, Lilbitoffit.com

http://www.instagram.com/lil_bit_of_fit

April 4, 2023

This Is Why You’re Not Getting What You Want

Be who you wish you had grown up seeing in the mirror, the one you’ll proudly & affectionately look back on being, & the one savoring the process becoming them

It’s 5:55am this is likely & algorithmically the worst time to post

girl sitting on couch with coffee in the morning

Alas, sometimes we just need to create when we have the mental real estate to do so.

We get so stuck in what’s next we don’t take enough pause to see how far we’ve come.

I cringed at my first stretch mark & belly roll.
I bought the lotions & creams, I cursed the genetics that gave them to me. I hated food – it was the enemy. The thing that made me fat & “undesirable.”

That’s where we started.

Now?
I feel nothing except gratitude for “flaws.”
They did everything they were supposed to.

I was the girl who wore a T-shirt over her bathing suit for years both because I was ashamed of my body & overweight, & I was always in pain, bloated, struggling with gut issues — which made me a miserable person because that’s how I chose to react.

I empathize with anyone struggling with a dis-ease that makes them feel like a prisoner in their own body, that makes them feel lost & weird & less than & hopeless.

I have scars from surgery on my abdomen. I have a scar from a navel ring, which I got when I turned 18 because my parents told me I couldn’t

I have creases & cellulite & stretch marks on my tummy & thighs because my body is miraculous & adaptable.

I have belly rolls when I sit down just like you. I have tons of sunspots & freckles & wrinkles from days making memories in the sun.

I’ve survived cervical cancer, infertility, renal stones, eating disorders, obesity, chronic pain from #crohnsdisease , scoliosis & old injuries, broken bones, depression, childhood & relationship trauma, debt in so many more ways than money…

…it’s called life. And we have the power to control how we respond to things

Take your power back.

Oxox Coach K

You can catch her via Instagram @lil_bit_of_fit & blog, Lilbitoffit.com

March 27, 2023

It’s Not Always Food Weighing You Down It’s This

I remember taking this picture & being scared shxtless. Because I was vulnerably showing my body & opening myself to criticism. (Emotional inflammation)…how emotional & energetic inflammation are holding you back!

I made a LOT of changes in my mid to late 30s. I am now 40 & feel Im the healthiest & happiest I’ve ever been.

Doesn’t mean I wasn’t kicked in the face a few times & f*cked up more than I wanna admit along the ride but the most important thing I can tell you is to learn the lessons!

People think they’re too old to change things and begin again. It’s never too late.

Once I made internal health my priority, emotional & physical inflammation all but disappeared.

It may look different than what your neighbor does or your favorite influencer does but you have to do what works for you.

Friendly reminder:

You’re never too old & it’s never too late to choose again. You have 1 body & 1 life — MAKE IT MATTER.

This message may trigger you🤷‍♀️

Ig Version Here

Good. Feel where it’s triggering you & why.

Then do something about it😉

Share something you’ve done that’s changed your body, health or life for the better. Anything goes! We would love to hear them in comments!

Coaching, guides, free stuff + are all available in the link in my Instagram bio HERE if you’re needing solutions & guidance on your journey!

Oxox Coach K

March 13, 2023

9 Devastatingly Painful Experiences That Transformed My Life

“I’ll be happier when” and why this is bullshit.

She told me, “Once I lose the weight I know I’ll find the right guy & the right job because I’ll be happier & more confident.”

I felt her emotion in my soul, that was me at one time, too.

I thought as long as I shrunk myself to the smallest version possible I would, then & only then, finally be happy in the depths of my disordered eating & abusive relationship with myself.

Somehow I convinced myself by controlling my body, I held the power.

Guess what?
Life kicked me in the face repeatedly.

However, despite the painful experiences of sickness, mental/physical heaviness of being obese, pain of living with Crohn’s, failed relationship & everything in between – I gained awareness.

I learned about communication, humility, compassion, empathy, self love, pride, proper nourishment, fitness, mindset, purpose, & the true meaning of wealth & happines.

I had one job I hated so much I wanted to cry every morning. I resigned after 2 months because I was miserable. I felt like the biggest failure & fell into a depression.

I didn’t know my purpose or what the f*ck I was supposed to be doing with my life. I didn’t know how to become the best version of myself.

I dove head first into researching & learning from resources & mentors such as The Secret, Abraham Hicks, Lacy Phillips @tobemagnetic , Bob Proctor, Wayne Dyer, Napoleon Hill, Dr. Joe Dispenza & more!

I learned about how I was wired, to embrace & accept myself thru researching my enneagram, astrology, human design, & Myers Briggs.

I learned that the statement, “I’ll be happier when”…
– was total bullsh*t.

So if you take anything from this post, please read these slides in their entirety. I promise you they will change your life!

9 Devastatingly Painful Experiences That Transformed My Life

1. Realizing I forced control & that following my heart was all that mattered.

It’s challenging to wrap your mind around getting quiet & doing less, doing what you love, & releasing the need to control or make sense of things are the secrets to having & experiencing everything we want. The Universe/God/Angels/Guides/whatever you believe give us exactly what we ask for & vibrate at. It just may not be in the form or ways that we anticipated. I found I was rejecting many of my manifestations & desires because they did not come to me in the people, places, things, & forms I THOUGHT they would come packaged as. Painfully humbling realization to say the least. I let my head control my decisions from what other people & society told me was “right” & “true.” Which I found were full of falsities, filters, facades, ill ego & were draining.

2. Realizing society lies & simply doing me unlocked the doors to manifesting.

I committed to learning & accepting more about myself, other people, & this world. Sources that opened my eyes: The teachings of Bob Proctor, The Secret, Lacy Phillips, Wayne Dyer, Abraham Hicks, Mike Dooley & his books Infinite Possibilities & Manifesting Change, & The Magic of Manifesting Series by Ryuu Shinohara. I now simply focus on feeling, allowing, & receiving whatever it is that I want in whatever form the Universe gives to me & feels right in my heart. I release questioning the who, what, why, & how. I know I can have whatever I want simply because I decide it is so which also takes action & intention. Release societies beliefs & rules on constructs on timelines, shoulds, love, work, relationships, wealth, health, money, success, etc. Live in the NOW. Your answers lie there.

3. Battling obesity & disordered eating.

By the time I was in the 7th grade, I weighed 160lbs at barely 5ft. My disordered eating & poor relationship with food & self started at the age of 8. I hated my thighs, my tummy, flabby back, & love handles.

I missed out on a lot of memories, parties, & wonderful experiences because I was that person who was too attached to their eating disorder, body dysmorphia, & f*cked up routine. My mental & physical health suffered. My relationships suffered.

Losing weight, finding a diet & lifestyle (carnivore & lifting) that worked for me, getting fit & strong helped me get a healthier body & boosted my confidence. It’s the reason I have success habits & a routine today to be my best self.

4. Realizing I create my reality.

I discovered 2 secrets that changed my life instantly:

belief systems
abundance mindset
Work on the 2, & you’ll be an invincible force.

I discovered that negative belief systems created a negative life. And that wasn’t acceptable anymore.

Until I recognized negative patterns & changed my self-talk, I was constantly settling & walking around as a watered-down, half-assed version of myself.
If your inner chatter is negative, how can you do something amazing on the outside?

Same with an abundance mindset — there is enough for all of us to thrive & be successful.

5. Quitting my job.

It’s hands down one of the scariest & best decisions I’ve ever made. I had a job I hated every single day. It was in a cath lab. I had anxiety, my health was suffering because of stress & I was miserable. My relationship at the time suffered too. They both were extremely toxic environments I knew I had to gtf out of.

This season led to some of the most painful & wonderful discoveries of my life – moving, making my own schedule, CrossFit & nutrition coaching, learning to leap with faith.

I cannot even think of going back to one traditional 9–5 job now & having somebody else control my life.

My standard of living has improved. I’m happier, have more time, & earn more. I learn new sh*t every day.

6. Going thru divorces & dates.

I can’t even begin to describe the feelings of failure & shame as an overachiever & people pleaser enduring not one but TWO divorces & numerous failed relationships.

I didn’t even know how to date after my first divorce at 27 years old. But with each year & each shade of relationship, I discovered more & more about myself, other people, love languages, & communication. That relationships were here for reasons, maybe only a season, a more extended period of time &/or everything in between & that was ok.

I learned what worked well for me, what didn’t, how to communicate more efficiently, how to be happy alone & mold into the human I am today.

I now experience life & people with joy & curiosity. I live by The Four Agreements & don’t take anything personally. I learned to release people with a loving heart.

7. Forgiving my past.

It’s messy to come from a life of trauma & bullying. It leads to a part of you being affected deep in your subconscious.

Even today, it pops up from time to time, but I’m able to navigate thru it successfully. It turned me into a people pleaser, enabler, & over achiever which made me feel I always had to me more than what I was or something different.

Huge piece of advice…forgive everyone who’s hurt you directly or indirectly — family, friends, strangers. Hate is poison. I’m free of worry, blame, anger, resentment, shame.

Thinking of this gives me peace & makes me feel I have more control over my life & confidence I can shape however I want to. Every day is magic!

8. Writing vulnerably online.

I started my IG over 10+ years ago simply sharing my fitness journey. Today, I write online to share all my life lessons & secrets about anything that might benefit someone out there.

It changed my life forever.
It gave me a voice, confidence, purpose, mediums to be of service, a side business that I’m proud of & so much more!

“Giving is the secret of abundance.” — Sivananda

It’s also something I enjoy doing immensely, so I’m grateful every day that I get the opportunity to serve. There’s not a single day I haven’t written about it in gratitude.

It’s also wonderful reflection & therapy for me too. So thank you for allowing me to add value to your lives!

9. Practicing the power of love.

So let’s talk about the power of negativity. You look at a friend having fun & you feel jealous. You think you’re not as good & focus on what you do not have. That’s a sad way to live, you know? Instead, what if you use the power of love everywhere — starting with yourself? Give yourself love via affirmations & become an energy of love to spread everywhere else.

How can you love someone else when your own cup is empty? This is why so many relationships are hollow. Time & physicality do not determine the success of a relationship. Intimacy, openness, acceptance, & being able to evolve beside one another, do. Love starts from you, & only then can it reach others.

“Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead.”- Oscar Wilde

I appreciate all y’all who take the time for me too to read & hold space❤️

Oxox Coach K

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