I still shower with a shower cap. Not washing my hair is a sport I have mastered.
Pete can attest.
He sits on the side of the tub in between my shower curtains. Can’t get a moment alone I tell ya. Moms, ya feel me?! 🤚
I’m not afraid to admit, however, there’s a lot of things I have not mastered.
“So what’s your 5 year plan?” Me — instant anxiety.
To be quite honest I can’t even tell you what I’m doing next weekend.
I mean, I can give you a generalization but I know as an emotional human being my wants & needs are going to change.
I’m a manifesting generator energy type ( human design ), it is what it is. I’ve learned to design my life around it, figured out how I’m wired, & I have manifested so much more abundance into my life since doing so.
I understand most of you, unless you fly your “woo flag” like me, have no idea what Human Design is or what that means — Google it. Links above! You’ll thank me later.
I had a phenomenal question by an instagram follower yesterday, which served as the inspiration behind this blog. I felt it was something everyone could use in their life.
I’ll summarize, she asked, “How do I effectively communicate to get what I want?”
I asked myself on numerous occasions over the years how in the hxll some people get whatever they want?
Let me paint a picture what my life used to be before halfway figuring this shxt out…
I too have been that human who:
– was living in the cheapest apartment in Anderson, IN & had to listen to the people downstairs physically beating each other & arguing every night
– was going through a divorce feeling like failure & confused about identity
– had my car repoed, $40,000+ in debt, $5 to my name, basically living out of my office & car, eating at hotels to save money on food
– was sick, struggling with Crohns, disordered eating & orthorexia feeling powerless & ugly
– was comparing wanting to be someone else, coveting their life &/or body thinking that would make me successful & happy
– was thinking being single meant there was something wrong with me & I needed to settle & find a partner fast to actually be worthy instead of realizing I needed to work on myself & be the person I wanted to be with first
– was getting involved in relationships, jobs, social plans when I felt resistance & ignoring my intuition, excessive drinking, overspending, giving my body to people who didn’t deserve it
So what did I do?
I knew I had to learn, hustle, believe in myself, be relentless in the pursuit of betterment, be resilient, & learn how to communicate with people to get what I want.
I made a list of the things I would need to do & the person I would need to embody to achieve these things. Areas: Health, Wealth, Self, & Relationships. These are my life pillars.
⁃ The BODY (Health) — healing, health, rest, eating ENOUGH, working out because I love my body, vibrancy, food & body freedom, self love
⁃ The CAREER (Wealth) — freedom, loving what I do, making an impact, following purpose not a paycheck
⁃ The RELATIONSHIP (Relationships) — doing the inner work, believing in myself worth, getting rid of preconditions I learned over time, self awareness of my shadows and triggers, being the person I would want to be with
⁃ The MINDSET (Self) — telling myself I’m a survivor, a thriver, I lead with my heart & I deserve everything I desire so I can serve others & myself to the highest degree. I deserve QUALITY and refuse to discount myself any longer.
Steps to get anything you want:
1.) You have to make a decision & get clarity on what you want (even if you don’t know how to get it). Find out what kind of manifestor you are. Here’s a great article on Specific vs Non Specific Manifestors. If you’re a specific manifestor, use detailed decisive statements like, “I want a partner by my 30th birthday” or “I want to lose 20lbs in 3 months.”
If you’re a non specific manifestor, like me, we prefer open generalities about how we want to FEEL. My favorite affirmation, “I accept and am open to receive whatever is meant for my highest alignment or better.”
2.) Detach from the “How” & desired outcome. Not knowing how something will come to fruition holds a lot of people back. Two things: divine timing & the Universe always has your back. Throw worry out the window. You have to take emotion out of it & be grateful no matter what happens.
3.) Visualize and BELIEVE in the desired outcome. Focus on how you feel with that thing you want. It’s like how athletes visualize perfect performance that leads to a win.
4.) Gratitude. Do you you look at your struggles as opportunities to grow or road blocks holding you back? When you practice being grateful for everything in your life no matter how small, you’re ability to manifest & get you want accelerates.
Getting what we want from others comes down to two things, awareness & communication.
Being a good communicator opens the doors to so much abundance & opportunity in your life.
It’s applicable in every facet of your life.
Whether you’re a:
️- Mom or dad raising children
– Entrepreneur growing a venture
– Businessman or woman trying to make a sale
– Coach working with athletes or clients
– Boss or coworker or part of a team, community, or organization
Awareness is being aware of the emotions, energy, & humanness of people & yourself.
Communication is being a good conversationalist & making someone feel seen, heard, understood, supported, & significant.
We live in a world of instant gratification, texts, swipes, & sliding into those DM’s.
Having a meaningful conversation & connecting with a person is truly an art.
I made an IG tv video on this very subject a few years ago. Check it out here on the gram!
I talk about being a good question asker, the difference between a shift & support response, & being an empath vs empathetic.
If you learn how to understand & communicate with people (including yourself), you will learn how to get that easy button a lot quicker & get what you (and they) want!
oxox Coach K
