Health Coach | Speaker | Writer | Welcome to my digital diary! I'm here to help you blend life & fitness to find your health & happy! Thank you for being part of my family & allowing me to add value to your journey!
I wanna be with someone that would divorce me if I gained 50lbs.
Now hear me out…morning ponderings & real talk…
I’ve thought a lot about my journey of becoming my best self: past mistakes, my health, my fitness journey, my relationships, & every facet of 50 shades of f*cked up & beautiful on this ride.
For those of you new here I’ll be 42 years old this year & still don’t know what the f*ck I’m doing. It’s ok. I love every minute of this life! I’m grateful for all the sh*t I’ve been through because it’s made me the woman writing this today in this journal entry.
My opening statement isn’t about weight gain & aesthetic changes, it’s about being THE PERSON & with a partner who holds high standards for themselves too & one who makes me want to be a better woman, partner — human.
A reminder for myself & maybe you too 🤷♀️to be with people who make you want to be the best version of yourself. Maybe they make you feel a little uncomfortable. Good. Choose people who are different & help you grow.
I set these standards for all relationships — platonic, business, & romantic.
Why? Because it influences who you are.
I understand we’ve all been taught about these “fantasy” relationships & unconditional love …
… I believe love is conditional because people change & that’s totally OK. Lovingly allow the right people into your lives yet also realize it’s OK to lovingly release those who do not fit your nonnegotiable conditions.
👉 The game of relationships & choosing wisely @hormozi 👌🏻 🎙️
This will probably trigger you… It triggers me everytime someone asks me. “How do I learn to love myself?”
Straight up, I’ll tell you, you are the reason you’re not where you wanna be. And it’s because of fear.
I tell you this as your coach & fellow human that understands.
For the majority of you following along my fitness journey via the interwebs, I feel confident saying we have many things in common, including this painful topic.
You see I realize now, as my 41 year old self, fear of gaining weight totally stifled my potential, controlled, & basically wrecking balled my life in every facet.
Every facet of life is connected. I categorize mine as health, self, wealth, & relationships.
My disordered eating & self love journey started at the age of 8.
Fear of gaining weight & self loathing caused me to live decades in agony & struggle.
I ate all the wrong things for me. All the “healthy” sugar free food & crazy diets that tore up my gut, hormones, & metabolism.
I starved, binged, purged, & over exercised myself to exhaustion, inflammation, & imbalances.
I didn’t have many friends & missed out on SOOO many memories because I feared eating food, both because I didn’t wanna go over my calories & be “fat” & I feared being judged for not being able to eat “normal” due to my Crohn’s.
I didn’t ask guys out, I doubted myself. I was never athletic enough, skinny enough, lean enough, strong enough, pretty enough, smart enough…
I never reached a body goal I was happy with no matter how thin I got or how strong I got. Not because I wasn’t a hard worker, I worked my ass off, but because my relationship with myself, my negative mindset, & fear of gaining weight controlled ME.
I had a DM from a woman desperate for me to give her magic macros & all the answers to get a lean physique.
First thing she said, “I’m afraid to gain the weight back, but what I’m doing isn’t working.”She was eating tons of lean protein, little fat, stated she was hungry all the time, fasting, working out like a fiend…sound familiar?
I said you’re right, it’s not working. The main issue isn’t not having the perfect macros or workout regime, it’s because you’re letting your fear of gaining weight block your doors of abundance & success.
It’s preventing you mentally & physically from making the correct decisions & courses of action. Your body also responds to your thoughts & feelings, if all you think & feel is self hate, despair, & poor health – that’s what you’re gonna get.
She said, “I never thought of it that way.”
I said, “Exactly.”
So I wrote a list of simple things I did to help me learn to love myself for you to refer back to. Make these yours however they fit & resonate.
I hope they give you HOPE that you can learn to love yourself too.
Simple Ways I Learned to Love Myself
Self awareness means to know & accept yourself. It’s impossible to love yourself if you don’t even know who you are. Invest in discovering what you believe, value, & like. And yes, this will mean making mistakes, but you’ll learn & discover what you do like.
I asked myself these questions: What are my strengths? How do I want to feel in my body, relationships, & finances? Who matters most to me? Who are my people? What am I ashamed of? What do I like to do for fun? What am I worried about that consumes my thoughts? What are my values? What do I believe in? If I could have one wish, it would be… Where do I feel safest? What or who gives me comfort? What or who do I numb with? If I wasn’t afraid, I would… What is my proudest accomplishment? What is my biggest failure? Am I a night owl or an early bird? How can I arrange my life to better suit this part of me? What do I like about my job(s)? Does it bring me joy & fulfillment? What do I do to show myself love & self-care? Am I an introvert or an extrovert? Am I energized being around others or being by myself? What is/are my happiest memory/memories? What am I grateful for?
Say “no” when you need to. It doesn’t make you a bad person, it makes you smart & more able to fully yourself & those around you. Boundaries are one HUGE form of self-care because they let others know that you are deserving of respect.
Comparison is the thief of Joy -Stop. Others aren’t better or worse, more or less than you; we’re all just different. You are worthy simply because you exist. Period. The reason we struggle is because we compare everyone’s highlight reels to our behind the scenes.
The reason we struggle is because we compare everyone’s highlight reels to our behind the scenes.
Know and own your strengths. We all have tremendous gifts. refer back to those questions in number 1. And again, stop comparing. When you’re busy, distracted, & always stuck in comparison “whoa is me” mode, it’s hard to acknowledge & access these vibrant qualities. Focusing on your strengths will increase your positive feelings for yourself & inner & outer vibration.
Let go of the past. Your past mistakes and imperfections don’t need you anymore. Cut the cords physically & energetically. Embrace your humanness. Mistakes are normal. Imperfections are part of what makes you, YOU. Everything is an experience. That’s it. You can choose & begin again every day.
Accept that some people won’t like you no matter what you do. All that matters is you love YOU. People view you from their own lens of life experience & trauma. We do this to others too. So think about that before you go to judge someone. Don’t waste your time trying to please people who are impossible to please or people who just aren’t that important to you. Being yourself means you have to give up your people-pleasing ways and embrace your authentic self. People pleasing leads to you losing yourself & ultimately building resentment.
Make JOY & fun unapologetic priorities. We were meant to live this life in Joy. Put something you love & look forward to on your agenda every week. Anticipation is a key stage in helping you feel happiness; by having something to look forward to, no matter what your circumstances, you bring happiness into your life well before the event actually takes place. That’s you vibrating those happy feelings we all want which helps us attract abundance into all areas of our lives.
Practice gratitude. Gratitude is one of the simplest ways to focus on the good in yourself and in your life. Name at least 3 things you’re grateful for when you wake up every morning. Flood your mind & morning with positive quotes, images, intentions for your day. This is an enormous part of my morning routine. I speak out everything I’m grateful for no matter how silly they seem. I can’t tell you how many times I say, “Thank you God & Universe” during my days. And it has made all the positive difference. Even for small things like a light turning green, or a parking space, or bills or expenses that enable me to live a life of comfort & joy.
Here are some things I like to do that help me live in positivity & gratitude:
Waiting in a checkout line, compliment someone. Acknowledge people & say good morning. Buy someone’s groceries or coffee. Be kind to the homeless & less fortunate.
Leave sweet notes for your partner, spouse, kids, roommates, coworkers, etc telling them how much you appreciate them. Send a kind text.
Send people gifts on Amazon. OMG, one of my favorite things to do! Get their address & send them something to brighten their day! You can do this anywhere & anytime without even leaving home or getting out of your pj’s!
Tip well & express gratitude for exceptional service. Give well deserved reviews. I do this at restaurants, bars, on instacart & amazon, surveys about services.
Thank the Universe, God, Collective- whatever & whoever you believe in for letting you live another day.
Thank Mother Earth & farmers for our food.
Express your appreciation for the weather.
Daily, write down at least 3 things you feel grateful for.
Look in the mirror & appreciate all the miraculous things your body does for you. What do you love about yourself?
Open the door for people. Help the elderly. Talk to everyone no matter who they are. Tell people who serve you THANK YOU!
Take nurturing, loving care of your body! Y’all, health is truly priceless & your greatest wealth. Give yourself the gift of feeling physically strong & thriving – move, exercise regularly, eat healthfully, hydrate, get 7-8 hours of sleep most nights, say no to gluttony, & minimize alcohol &/or other numbing mechanisms. The most successful, happy people are those with daily success habits & a routine that helps them thrive!
Write yourself a love letter. Get it out, you’re amazing! This puts all the wonderful intentions out there & that’s what you’ll attract back to you. We attract what we ARE. Attraction also includes the words ACTION. Do the things that embody the person you desire to be. Repeat this list in the mirror every morning. Write them out on post it notes & put them where you can see them.
Surround yourself with a nurturing, up leveling environment. This includes everything you consume: people, books, movies, social media, food, drink, jobs, where you live, where you hang out, etc. Who you spend time with reflects how you feel about yourself. People who feel worthy surround themselves with positive people. Sometimes loving yourself means you have to end relationships & things & let them go. Let them go with LOVE.
Things that keep me HIGH VIBE⚡️✨:
Pinterest scripting (saving photos I wanna manifest & those that make me feel AMAZING, LUSCIOUS, VIBRANT, EMPOWERED, etc)
High vibe music
Exercise, walking, nature
Infrared sauna, red light therapy
Positive podcasts & audiobooks
Coloring & Canva design
Talking to my people, writing
Smiling at someone, hugging
Doing something kind for someone
Gratitude shower
Putting on makeup, hair/wardrobe accessories
Dressing in sparkly vibrant clothes/jewelry
Massage, Doing my nails, lash & hair extensions
Organizing & cleaning my space
Wearing certain colors #colortherapy
Start with the ones that feel easiest for you & work on something new every week. A reminder you can do hard things, especially when the hardest thing feels like loving YOU.
Hailing from Fishers, Indiana, Katie is an aficionado of healthcare, fitness, & personal development.
You can find her personal weight loss & healing story here.
She’s been involved in travel nursing & radiography for 20 years! She’s a writer, connection maker, nutritionist, & entrepreneur who loves helping others & squeezing every drop out of life!
Katie grew up on her family’s beef cattle & crop farm where agriculture & healthcare were her first loves.
She is a Purdue University graduate well known for her storytelling of life lessons & personal transformation with weight loss & Crohn’s disease.
She competed as a competitive CrossFit athlete in her early 30’s. After decades of struggling with her own health issues from Crohn’s, obesity, disordered eating, infertility, & hormonal imbalances, she is passionate about helping others find self-love, achieve their health & business goals, & create sustainable success habits for an EXTRAordinary life!
We also talked about how the people who are comfortable being alone will never waste your time with dating games.
Zero bullshit. If they’re special, you’ll know & you’ll know you’re special too because they choose to spend time with you over their favorite person, themself.
Hi. It me 😆👋
I thoroughly enjoy straight forward people who take the lead & tell me exactly what they want. You always know where they stand.
People who have taken the time to be alone & be ok with it are basically interviewing you to replace ourself as our new best friend & we really don’t want to give up that position but we are also intrigued & hopeful that there is more out there❤️
Therapy confessions👉Things people ask me that make me laugh, want to drink🥃 & smoke a cigar😂(💁🏼♀️like I need a reason sip bourbon & smoke a cigar but whatever🙃)
Why are you single?
Are you getting married again?
Don’t you want kids?
Listen, I admittedly was a serial monogamist the majority of my life. I was the girl that always had a boyfriend.
I had only dated & kissed 2 guys up until the age of 27. Don’t worry, I made up for it quickly after my 1st divorce😆why lie. They call it the “Hoe Phase” for y’all not familiar👀
I don’t think I ever really learned how to “date.”
I honestly had no idea WHAT I was doing.
It’s like I just wanna hang with an awesome person, go adventuring & do cool sh*t with. One I love being around, that’s easy & down the road if it turns into something more, that’s the end goal🤷♀️
Had a follower ask what I thought she should do about dating & marriage…everyone laugh now😹
So we talked…
Don’t know if I’ll ever get married again, never say never. I know the people meant for me, find me. Hell I’m not even sure what the right answer is anymore nor do I care.
I feel relationships are whatever you choose to define them as, not what society tells you. I don’t feel you need a contract for happiness or validation.
By dating you do figure out what you don’t like so you know what you do like.
THINGS NOT TO DO:
Don’t say yes to men or women who aren’t suitable for you, don’t ignore red flags just because you don’t want to be single. Don’t do things you don’t agree with just to keep a relationship going. Don’t dishonor your own values just so you aren’t lonely. Don’t lose yourself. Don’t lose faith in love.
One day, you’ll understand the price is too high to pay to lose yourself — the most important person in your life.
All of your painful experiences craft you into the impeccable person you are today.
And the right person will appreciate every part of you, your story & let you live life on your own terms.
The right person feels like freedom & home imo. You can’t read a book to tell you how to feel…
You can read all the books in the world but if you can’t read yourself you can’t efficiently execute anything.
#shitmytherapistsaid
Has anyone else felt they read all the books but in honesty you realized you were a really sh*tty executor, too?😆👋
A painful truth brought up in therapy one time was the realization that when I felt anything or anyone was touching the walls of my freedom or made me feel “unsafe” or “wrong” — I’d run.
Confessions of a recovered avoidant🙋♀️
It was fear. I had a follower ask me today if I’ve ever been afraid of anything so much that I ran from it. Fxck me.🤦♀️ It forced me to painfully sit there & reflect.
I realized thru experiences & relationships what I should’ve been asking myself during periods of discomfort was, “Is this relationship or experience making me want to up level into a better woman?”
I stayed in a LOT of situation-ships & cohabitations far longer than I should have because of fear.
I also RAN from a lot of potential relationships because of fear. Fear to be in a situation-ships or comfortably numb cohabitation again.
I didn’t have the tools back then or self awareness to assess/navigate relationships & life experiences effectively.
If you feel you have to appear a certain way to receive validation, respect, or love — you need to figure out what it is inside you that makes you want to change to be more accepted & worthy.
Look for the pebbles in your shoes, they may not be large stones but they will cut you after time.
All right, hope my ramblings and therapy sessions helped you toO!
Love & hugs,
Coach “no longer in my hoe phase (thank the Lord 🙏😄)” K
I cringed. Conversation starter…saw a T-shirt this mornin that said, “The best man for the job is a woman.”🫣
Why do we feel the need to have to hate on the opposite sex? I’m so grateful my parents taught me it’s OK to be a “girl” & it’s OK to be strong like a “man” too. They just wanted my brothers & I to be ourselves.
Listen Linda, I’ve been divorced twice, but I still LOVE & appreciate men. I’m grateful for y’all. I acknowledge there are some things you men do way better than me, & I’m totally OK letting you do it.
I love everything about women, too, we’re both simply unique. (get yer minds out of the gutter, because I know they went there😂)
My mom taught me I can do anything a man can do, & if I can’t, I can hire it done.
💁🏼♀️Girl boss shi*t level 100
— THIS is more about being a self-sufficient human, not hating on the other sex.
It’s like when I get questions when you could’ve simply Googled & YouTubed that shiz
Ima straight shooter, we real talk on this channel. Y’all can do your own life admin.
I know I don’t need someone to take care of me nor do I feel like I have to have a man to be happy, but I do love the feeling of having someone to protect & take care of me because they want to.
Successful relationships thrive because you see each other as equals & want the best for one another. Your happiness is my happiness.
Not because either one feels they can’t take care of themselves or are incomplete without the other.
A negative pattern I used to fall into, I would attract partners where I quickly fell into the role of mom, teacher, &/or enabler.
Karen, we ain’t got time for that.
And neither do you guys. Choose a woman that makes you want to be a better man, that lets you be yourself, lets you be the provider, lets you be the more masculine, enjoys taking care of you & most importantly, is your best friend.
Ladies, vice versa.
A healed, confident person is honest, blunt af, & tells you exactly who they are & what they want. If you’re confused, there’s your answer.
How bout we all simply love people for the humans we are & what we bring to the table?!
Love is a classroom not a candy shop. — Life lessons I’ve learned from the school of hard knocks 📸 : simply showin love for this lil meat sack in the mirror.
Self love is the best love.
Love is the most powerful force in the world. In my opinion, the only thing that matters. For nothing would exist in this world, including you, without love.
I used to think there was only one soulmate out there made specifically just for you. After 39 years I’ve learned you’ll meet many people & things throughout your life that will be your “soulmate.” Some for seasons & others maybe for life.
I define “soulmate” now as a mate that helps you find your soul. This includes yourself, memories, places, things, friends, family, lovers, & enemies.
A book that changed my life 15 years ago, The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. I discovered it in a desk drawer at work & no one knew how it got there. I was miserable at this time struggling in my marriage & with mental & physical health. It taught me the power of my thoughts, love, & perspective.
Lessons I’ve learned about love that may help spark thought & introspection for you today…
-When you seek pleasure & lust it always runs away from you but when you seek purpose, understanding & connection, pleasure comes towards you because it’s a byproduct of you putting in the work.
Learn about yourself & your person. Understand what you both love, how you’re both wired, love languages, etc.
Things that helped me understand myself & other people… FUN STUFF ABOUT ME👇 ▪️Manifesting Generator (Human Design) basically get sh*t done & move at the speed of thought. Busy bodies, worker bees, get more done before 9am than most do in a week.
▪️ENFJ (Myers Briggs) among the rarest of the 16 types, only 2-3% of the population. The ENFJ is warm, extroverted, engaging, charismatic, persuasive, & talkative. Oprah, Barack Obama, Maya Angelou.
▪️2w3 (Enneagram) The helper/achiever, desire to fulfill the needs of others & can sense emotions with clarity & precision. Helping & achieving brings us Joy.
▪️Astrology: I’m a Rising Scorpio ♏️ , Cancer ♋️ Sun, Sagittarius ♐️ moon. Basically a contradictory Unicorn because I love deep thinking, caretaking, & solitude, but the Sag loves freedom, extroversion & adventure. I’m freedom & home❤😘
All of these things craft a completely unique & wonderful individual. You can always know someone deeper.
This is why there is so much infidelity because we are addicted to newness. So why don’t you learn something new about your other half? It’s just like walking down the same path every day, why don’t you try to notice a new flower, rock, or tree? Then you’ll discover the same old paths can always be new & exciting. Look for the extraordinary in the ordinary.
Be playful but don’t play mind games. If you’re interested, make the move & observe. If they don’t respond, move on. We build strength when we make the move because we build confidence. This is you being in charge of your destiny. Mind games destroy the authenticity of a relationship.
Making someone feel bad doesn’t make them good. You change because of love, clarity, & communication. We don’t change because of judgment, guilt, & expectation
Any recurring issues you need to solve for the long run.
Prepare your partner for your mood swings & schedule. Communicate what makes you feel safe. For example, ask, “Do you need support or a solution.?” “Does saving make you feel safe or your earning power?” Check in with your other half. Pick one day a week & have a date check in. Ask them, “What was the highlight of your week & how can I help you?
Focus on how you can complement, not compete or complete. When you compete you’re trying to be everything. When you compliment, you are just being you. Take a moment & recognize what your other half brings to the relationship.
Happy Super Bowl Sunday & Valentine’s Eve, squad! Go out there & love someone today!
I love storytelling. I love storytelling my life & I love hearing people share stories about their lives, emotions, & experiences.
I loathe small talk.
Most likely a big reason I find dating exhausting. Too many people are only willing to scratch the surface of actually getting to know someone, putting in the minimal effort required, vapid conversations.
Hardly anyone actually asks you out on a date or even coffee to meet face to face anymore.
I thoroughly enjoy a confident, masculine man who takes the lead & is on the old fashioned side.
Speaking of old fashioneds, ☝️ point if you too fancy this beloved cocktail of choice. Double ribeye points (I just can’t say brownie😂) if you buy me one AND tell me stories about your ambitions, your big goals, your likes/dislikes, weird thoughts, dreams, whatever – I wanna hear it.
Embrace who you are.
Since freeing myself from the chains of people pleasing & what I thought I “should be” & blazing a path of my own, that painful path has led me to being the happiest I have ever been. It has allowed my light to shine & attract the right people, places, lessons, & opportunities.
Not all these things were rainbows & sunshine & sweet cocktails & coffee that taste like heaven. Some felt like gaping wounds that you poured salt on & chased with a shot of bad tequila or a yager bomb.
GAG.
BAD memories from college. Same with anything peach or that semi resembles jungle juice.
Oprah Winfrey said, “Challenges are gifts that force us to search for a new center of gravity. Don’t fight them. Just find a new way to stand.”
Happy birthday to Queen O today btw. I love Aquarians, from one “weirdo” to another, I see you.
To all my astrology nerds out there, I’m a Scorpio Rising, Cancer Sun, & Sagittarius Moon. Very much a Scorpio/Sag.
Kinda like I’m the most positive, open minded, free spirited, fun person to be around, but my feelings run deep & I will cut a mf if I have to to protect my peace, my family, my people, & my money.
Today, a reminder to just be you, be weird, be kind to people, get to know one another. And realize you’re never behind, there are no timelines, & fulfillment means something different to us all.
I haven’t traveled the world, but I’ve experienced some really cool places. I’ve lived thru moments of what some people back home would only dream of, but yet, I’ve found more fulfillment in my morning coffee, writing, caring for livestock & my plants, that 1st bite of delicious food, listening to music that brings back smiles & memories, watching the flowers & trees dance, feeling sunshine on my skin, & somehow those are more savory.
You know those days where your problems seem GINORMOUS? Or you just feel frustrated & agitated af & don’t know why?
Love my career! Although I didn’t go to Purdue specifically for radiology, I still got a BS degree in Science. Still consider West Lafayette my home away from home & a piece of my heart will always be there.
— I feel you. I feel I’m dippin my toes again into a big pool of transition. Ugh, times like these are heavy & almost suffocating. I’m blaming it on #mercuryretrograde
I came across an astronomy account called @astronomybasics Y’all, my inner Purdue science nerd geeks out on this stuff. I love it! This post shared facts about 2 black holes, called “binary black holes” because they orbit each other. They’re BIG & beautiful & 1.3 billion light years away.
How freaking amazing is this????!!!!!!
Makes you & your human “problems” seem small & silly, right?!
I remember in college worrying about the stupidest sh*t…like lookin fat in my outfit for Thursday nights at the Neon Cactus or the big fraternity party that week. I don’t know if anyone else experienced looking at a picture after your freshman year & cringing because you realize you gained the freshman 15 (or 20 in my case).
Forever Grateful, Forever True!
I remember my brother telling me how much “bigger” I was. OMG I wanted to hide in shame & thought life was over.
Since we’re on the subject of #collegelife looking back on my 4 years at Purdue, I realize how many countless hours I spent in the classroom & studying for tests. (Ok, maybe I didn’t spend AS much time on those things as keg stands, flippy cup, & Greek events, but alas, it added up & I still made Dean’s list.)
When I think about all that time I spent working toward my degree, I wonder, what did it really leave me with? A piece of paper that will continue to gather dust?
I thought harder…my dudes, I learned so much more via college experiences than academics. I’ll share a few with you & hopefully they spark introspection & give a sense of peace wherever you are right now…
No one gives a sh*t about your GPA, people care more about how you make them feel, your integrity & effort.
Learn self discipline, ain’t nobody here to hold your hand. Work smarter not harder.
Just when you think a mf won’t do you like that, they def will do you like that. It be that way sometimes. Watch your words, be picky about the company you keep.
Care for something other than yourself, but not more than you care for yourself.
Big friend circles don’t mean you’re cooler or loved more. Your circles will become smaller as you get older & that’s ok. Make sure you surround yourself with people smarter & more successful than you.
Real independence is found in being comfortable alone, on your own without needing someone with you to stabilize you. Realize being independent doesn’t mean you’re not smart enough to delegate & ask for help.
It’s easy to think that there should be more people like you in the world, but once you open your mind to groups of unfamiliar people, you become able to see that our differences are what make humanity so beautiful.
As I matured in college & life, I began to see my parents as people, instead of just “my parents.” I began to appreciate them for who they are, their experiences, sacrifices, & realize they’re constantly evolving & learning just like me.
It is impossible to hold on to everything in your life; sometimes, you have to burn bridges & move on, others you learn to lovingly release & let go. As Dylan McKay once said, “May the bridges I burn light my way.”
Say NO. I used to be the girl who couldn’t say, no — until I had to. Life places demands on you that can be detrimental. You do not have time for everything & you will never please everyone. Saying “no” isn’t about being weak, missing out or offending others, it’s about being smart & understanding what’s meant for you.
Dream BIG. College showed me a little piece of the world, & that little piece was enough to teach me to dream of bigger & better possibilities.
Create your own possibilities & live life to the fullest because our time here is tiny & short & so are we in this Universe.
Like, “Dear Baby Jesus, did I really put that out in the world?” SMDH
My old social media posts, ESPECIALLY those on Facebook often make me wanna hide underneath a rock. On the other hand, some make me smile, some laugh, some wonder if I even had a brain or any sense of style. Those you see & you’re like, “WTF was I wearing &/or WTF was I thinking dating that person?!”
Come on, laugh, let the WTF’s flow! Judgment free zone!
As I’ve aged & became more comfortable & in love with myself, I realized they are also clues & puzzle pieces to the way I absorbed the world, evolved, & learned to eventually (hopefully), more successfully navigate as an adult.
Don’t know bout ch’all but I still feel like I’m a kid. I remember when I thought 30 was old & by 40 all the fun sh*t was over.
Hell I’m just gettin started!
I don’t consume much social media nowadays as compared to when I’d scroll endlessly without INTENT. Key word – Intent.
I use it more for content creation & connection. It is easy to get sucked into the rabbit hole. Be careful to not place your worth in your profiles. I enjoy using mine as an educational tool & expressive extension of my personality, but I choose not to use it as a barometer of my worth, existence, or social resume.
The other day tho, up popped a FB memory that went back 16 years to when I was married, unhappy, confused af, an addict to food, alcohol, & toting around a sh*tty midset, “shoulding” all over myself.
It read, “Fck this adulting, bout to get fckedddd up!”
Welp, glad my use of sentence enhancers haven’t changed.
But instead of feeling shameful, this 39 year old human felt such a sense of pride & gratitude. Pride for how much I’ve grown & gratitude for this space in life, in time – with all of you!
I know y’all relate to this too. Just wanted to check in with ya in hopes you’re also sittin in this space of awareness, love, & acceptance instead of shame, sadness, & regret.
Laugh y’all! Life is meant to be lived in JOY! No ragrets.
I saw a post today by @wittyidiot that I felt in my soul. I know I’m not the only one out there that absolutely thrives being alone the majority of the time.
And I really hope you guys are your own best friend, you really should be.
So hear me out, you’ll appreciate this.
He said: “The people who are comfortable being alone will never waste your time with dating games. All business, zero bullshit. If they’re special, you’ll know and you’ll know you’re special too because they choose to spend time with you over their favorite person, themself.
It’s the last place we want to be. We’re basically interviewing you to replace ourself as our new best friend and we really don’t want to give up that position but we are also intrigued that there is more out there than the echoing cacophony of our own bullshit in our heads.”
✊Preach it brother.
I am at the stage where I don’t simply want to be crazy in love.
