Month: March 2021

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If I could share only 1 life lesson it would be this

NO.1 REGRET OF THE DYING: “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”

I had a terminal patient tell me this years back as I finished their CT scan.

@aubreymarcus posted a powerful reminder yesterday, a perfect reminder as we start another week:

“Your future self will look back on your life right now, & wish you could live it again. Not because you want to DO anything different. But because you wish you enjoyed it more.

The number 1 deathbed regret is, “I wish I would’ve let myself be happier.” At the end of our life we realize that happiness is a choice, made in the moment, in spite of whatever is happening.”

☝🏻If I could share only 1 life lesson with you, it would be this.

MANAGE YOUR MIND AND YOU CAN MANAGE ANYTHING.

We get lost in a storm of emotions & expectations — from others, from ourselves, from society.

Emotions around your body, career, & relationships. Some like:

BODY: I need to look like her/him to be more attractive & worthy. When in fact you need to love yourself & body for everything you are, not what you aren’t. 

CAREER: I’m not “rich” or successful until I have x in the bank or achieved a certain status. When in fact you’re already rich if you have a career you love, a roof over your head, food to eat, & people who love you. 

RELATIONSHIPS: I need a partner to be worthy. Which typically nudges us to settle for people not deserving, or seeking people for purely physical reasons. We blind ourselves to the real secret to finding a partner in life…being self aware, knowing your worth & theirs, learning to build a home in yourself 1st, & embodying the person you seek to be with. The ‘right’ one feels like freedom & home.❤️⠀

There will always be shxt that comes up & temporarily throws your life out of your control, but you choose your perspective & reaction. 

When you’re working, work. 

When you’re eating, eat. 

When you’re listening, listen. 

When you’re loving, LOVE. 

We’re always living. But the question is, are you living YOUR best life?   

Drop a ❤️ if you’re ready. I am. 🤘🏻🔥

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The One Thing You Need to Do To Attract Successful Relationships

I said, “Get a life.”⁣
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Had the pleasure of snuggling up with a green beverage & answering questions with a digital friend yesterday on St. Patrick’s day.⁣
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She said, “I just need to pick your brain about some relationship things I’m going through. I respect & appreciate your positive energy sprinkled with such blunt honesty.” ⁣
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I laughed 😄 ⁣
Best compliment I had all day.⁣
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My dad used to say I was a lot like a caged raccoon. They’re attracted to shiny things & look all cute & harmless, but as soon as you stick your fingers in the cage they bite’em off. ⁣
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Thanks Dad. ⁣
If you don’t come from the Midwest or the South you may not understand that metaphor. Lol 😂 ⁣
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I swear I don’t bite 😉⁣
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Anywhoodle…⁣
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She asked, “What’s the 1 piece of advice you would give to someone with codependency in every relationship they seem to have? Because that’s me. I feel I change for every relationship and rely on other people for my sense of happiness which in turn results in failed friendships & romantic relationships.”⁣
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I don’t know about y’all but I felt this woman’s question in my soul. That used to be me.⁣
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I wasn’t happy or felt any self worth unless I had a partner. I would let their energy affect my energy. I would change my interests, wants, & needs to suit their‘s. I would make their life, my life — to the point I felt my purpose was to simply serve them. ⁣
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If you don’t know what codependency means:⁣
⁣
noun⁣

  1. excessive emotional or psychological reliance on a partner, typically one who requires support on account of an illness or addiction.⁣
    ⁣
    Apparently being in a relationship was an illness and an addiction. My Achilles’ heel per se.⁣
    ⁣
    So I told her, “Get. A. Life.”⁣
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    You know why we struggle with relationships in today’s society? Because we don’t cultivate a self aware one with ourselves first. ⁣
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    Because we don’t connect our souls with one another anymore, we like to connect our social media accounts & swipe right. ⁣
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    We communicate with ambiguity. Vapid small talk just to fill silence. We ourselves don’t get clarity on what we really want. ⁣
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    It seems when we do fall in love, it’s only after considering if we’re settling or not, whether a person can give us the life we want & fulfill unrealistic desires. ⁣
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    We’re blinded by filters. We forget to date one another. We let passion & playfulness & adventure die. We don’t ask what the other needs to be seen, heard, loved, & supported. ⁣
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    We look for someone perfect to complete us while we already have the best possible one within us. ⁣
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    I’m just gonna say this, ‘singlehood’ has been vilified for way too long. I believe it’s actually the 1 thing people need to experience fully in order to cultivate more successful , meaningful relationships. ⁣
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    If you don’t build a home in yourself first & don’t even know who you are as your authentic self, how do you expect to get to know someone else on a deeper level & accept them as they are?⁣
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    It truly goes back to self love & self worth. You are seeking these things from other people. ⁣
    ⁣
    High seekers do the same thing. Everything‘s great when it’s new & fun but as soon as the ‘real life’ mundane button is pushed, you become avoidant & seek new highs.⁣
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    Yup, calling myself out there too. Queen of the avoidants. Thanks to my therapist for pointing that out.⁣
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    Through therapy I learned how being made fun of as a kid affected my relationships & love life. I built walls so high around myself & guarded them with weapons of avoidant attachment, sarcasm & ambiguity. ⁣
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    My therapist told me I am REALLY GOOD at acting like I don’t give a fxck. So much so I somehow taught myself how to shut my emotion off & that’s why I was able to cut people out of my life with no remorse.⁣
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    Oooof. Fxck me, right?! 😆⁣
    Sound familiar? ⁣
    Anyone else an avoidant like me? 🤚 ⁣
    ⁣
    Guys that liked me who were attractive, smart, & successful intimidated me whether I liked them or not because I felt I was still that fat girl & not successful enough to be worthy of a relationship with them. My therapist said I placed them in this box of the popular boys at school that used to make fun of me, which wasn’t fair to them or myself. ⁣
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    So I’d ‘settle’ for less than men, frankly, as she put it, “Not on on the same level as me.” I did this because subconsciously I knew I was smarter, more successful, and more in control.⁣
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    Same with successful women, too. I felt I wasn’t good enough to “sit at the cool kids table.”⁣
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    Oooof. Another fxck me.😫⁣
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    These are the things you need to hear. I understand it’s not what you want to hear. They’re dirty, & heavy, & gross.⁣
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    Find yourself. Date yourself. You have to be whole first. No one completes you or owns your relationship. A relationship is shared, it’s like a Google Drive. ⁣
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    What happens is you get into a relationship & lose your life slowly. That relationship then becomes your life, your world.⁣
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    Then when something goes wrong in that relationship, or there is conflict, your world comes crashing down because you’ve made that relationship your world.⁣
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    We share our life with our partner we don’t give our life to our partner & vice versa. It doesn’t mean to love LESS it means to love SO MUCH your wholeness, & your partners wholeness mean more individually so you can both be POWERFUL AF together.⁣
    ⁣
    Find someone carrying their own bag. ⁣
    Find someone that is willing to sit on the floor beside you. Y’all can pack & unpack your bags together. ❤️⁣
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    I’ll be right there with you, with a cocktail or coffee, your choice 😉 ⁣
    ⁣
    Oxox Coach K⁣
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Simple Cheesy Carnivore Meatballs

Y’all know how much I love beef & my airfryer.

I named my airfryer 💁🏼‍♀️His name is Albert. If you’ve been following me for a bit you know I name all my plants too🪴💕

After experimenting with all different kinds of ground meats, 85% ground beef is my fav. Just the right amount of fat for my macros, flavor, & texture.

I used to bake meatballs all the time, but fell in love with the crispy edges on meat when cooking in the airfryer. I thought, why the heck not, let’s airfry’em. 

You can add cheese with this recipe or omit if sensitive to dairy. You can also use different kinds of ground meats, have fun with these!! Ground Pork is another fav, if you’re trying to reduce fat use a leaner ground chicken or ground turkey like a 93%

Simple Cheesy Carnivore Meatballs

Ingredients

  • 2 lbs ground beef (I like 85%, idc if it’s grass fed or grain fed. I feel people over complicate things. As long as it agrees with your health, eat it. I prefer grain fed for taste.)
  • 2 large eggs
  • 2 oz pork rinds ( @epicbar brand baked pork rinds are my fav)
  • 3 oz shredded Italian cheese blend (or whatever you’d like)
  • 1 tsp pink Himalayan sea salt 

Instructions

  • Mix all ingredients in a bowl. 
  • Roll into balls (~1-2 inches in diameter) Should make 24 meatballs.
  • Cook at 350 degrees for 8 minutes. Turn meat balls & cook for another 4 minutes.

Ballpark Macros per 4 meatballs

(These’ll vary depending on your meatball size & what ingredients you include)

Carbs: trace maybe from your cheese

Protein: ~40g

Fat: ~32g

Enjoy y’all!

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What fitness and being raised on a farm taught me

Life ain’t always tacos & tequila 🌮🍸but it should be 🎉 😝 (more like beef & bourbon🥩🥃 for this girl.)

In other words, you don’t always get whatcha want but ya get whatcha need. It hinges on your perspective & reaction.

Yes, ‘whatcha’ is a word. Hxll my talk & text can’t even decipher my Indiana twang. Anybody else have that problem? 📲 

Raised on a cattle & crop farm in small town Indiana I grew up hearin things like, “Sexy as socks on a rooster” and “Quit your dickin around” an awful lot. 😂 

Cleaning the barn 💩🐮 was punishment. That and picking up rocks out of the field.

And you did not wanna hear mom say I’m gonna call dad — you knew your a$$ was in trouble.

I wouldn’t have changed my childhood for anything. Priceless life lessons that never could’ve been taught sitting in a classroom — the value of hard work, honesty, the Golden Rule, love, teamwork, responsibility, discipline, & the relentless pursuit of betterment.

Katie what the hxll does this have to do with your bathroom photo this mornin half naked in @Amazon underwear? 😆 — I’m getting to that.

You see these life lessons were the foundational bricks that transferred into my success habits AND fitness.

Most people scroll & look at the after photo & want to be &/or look like that person but they’re not willing to commit & do the work behind it. That’s what you need to think about. 

Can you do what that person had to do to get where they are? (Eat more food, reverse diet, commit to healing & rest, work thru the hunger in a cut, etc)

Is that your story & authentic self?

Have you learned the correct bricks to build your foundation? (Macros, eating maintenance, what foods you can digest, trigger foods, eating schedules, workout schedule, etc)

Growing up on a farm & fitness taught me a few things:

— They taught me I CAN do the hard things. I’m stronger than I think.

— They taught me how to stay committed, not just by what I looked like in the mirror, but simply by keeping the promises I made to myself to be healthy.

— They taught me discipline. Getting those workouts in, working with my 4H calves, hitting the macros, eating foods I can digest vs crap, sleeping over drinking all night.

— They taught me the value of hardwork & that I can do anything I put my mind to.

— They taught me having a serving & loving heart is more important than having a set of abs or five grand champions. 

As creatures on this earth, we either find comfort in not trying or comfort in the extreme. It’s difficult to find comfort in the balance.

There will be bumps along the way. They’re called lessons and remember you don’t always get what you want you get what you need 🌱 🪴 

Cheers y’all happy St. Patrick’s Day from Kelly Farms🍀🍻 

Go make memories, have fun, remember no good story started with a salad 🥩🥗🥂😄

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A letter to my soulmate

A woman messaged me this morning & asked how I seemed so happy by myself.

I looked at Pete 🐈‍⬛ 

He said it was because of him.🙃 

— Looking at the vomit on my floor I told him he’s lucky I love him. 😂 

She said she struggled feeling “happy” not being in a relationship.

I told her, I’m happy because I’m whole. Another person doesn’t make you whole. We’re here to find the relationships that compliment our wholeness.

The 1st relationship you need to work on is with yourself.

I shared with her a letter I wrote in my journal to my soulmate years ago. I have many newbies around here and I’ll share it again for y’all:

𝘈 𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘦 

𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘢 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘱 𝘰𝘧 𝘶𝘯𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦, 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘧𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘧𝘶𝘭𝘭 𝘰𝘧 𝘱𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘺, 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘮𝘶𝘯𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, & 𝘣𝘦𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘧𝘶𝘭 𝘧𝘭𝘢𝘸𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱 𝘶𝘴 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘸. 

𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘥, 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘯, 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘥, & 𝘴𝘶𝘱𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥. 

𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳, 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘳, 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘨𝘵𝘩 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘢𝘬, 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘴 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭. 

𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘸𝘢𝘭𝘬 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘴 𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘴, 𝘺𝘦𝘵 𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘺 & 𝘴𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘦. 

𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳 & 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥, 𝘸𝘦 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘰 𝘦𝘷𝘰𝘭𝘷𝘦. 

𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘦𝘦𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺, 𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺, 𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺, & 𝘱𝘩𝘺𝘴𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 – 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘦𝘥. 

𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘮𝘺 𝘩𝘶𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵, & 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘱𝘶𝘳𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘦, 𝘪𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘪𝘯𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘦, 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘰𝘱𝘦𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵. 

Take the risks. Feel free to tag, share, & keep this letter for yourself as a reminder 🤗 ❤️

Love y’all oxox

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Sorta Sweet, Sorta Beth Dutton

In case you needed the reminder, it’s OK to be sorta sweet, sorta Beth Dutton. 🤚🥃 

Yellowstone. 

I have not been so obsessed with a show since Grey’s Anatomy, One Tree Hill, & Sex and the City. 

Who else?

I wanna hear what shows you love in comments!!!!👇🏻

Soooo I’m not naturally “feminine” per se. 

4 words: Bull in China Shop. 🐮 

3 words: Indiana. Corn. Fed. 🌽 😂 

I guess I never noticed how rough around the edges I was until a boyfriend criticized me for always throwin sh*t around & slammin cabinet doors.

Drove him nuts. 

I said we’ll maybe you’re just fragile🤷‍♀️😆

It made me wanna change myself, however. I thought, well dang, there’s something wrong with me.

I changed for him — & felt a pit of shame.

Ridiculed as my shyer, younger self, I felt less than. I didn’t fit the mold of the “pretty” girls at school.

So I spent the majority of my life tryna change & shrink myself.

I always find myself playing in the “boys club” — the guys girl. I have a very small intimate group of women I surround myself, but I find naturally I’m drawn to being friends with men. 

I’m the oldest of 3, I have 2 younger brothers.

Played baseball until I was told I couldn’t play anymore because I was a girl. I still can’t throw underhand worth a sh*t.

I’m good at throwin a football but was told I’m a girl so I couldn’t play football. I have 1 helluva an arm. 💪🏼 My grandfather was the football coach.

I was raised on a farm in a small town in Indiana, treated no differently than my brothers.

We’re raised to be productive, strong, tough — rub some dirt in it you’ll be fine.

I excelled as a student, in the top part of my class, president of my 4-H & FFA clubs, had scholarships to Purdue & graduated magma cum laude. #boilerup

I’m grateful for every single piece of 50 shades of fxcked up that makes me — ME.

I’d tell my younger self 1 thing — you weren’t made to fit in, you were made to move mountains.🏔 

Now, remember to be yourself. 

Oh, & go light some shxt on🔥✨

#mindsetmonday

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Love and Life Lessons That Will Make You Laugh

I said, “Well I’m pretty easy to please, don’t tell me what to do, make me laugh, just give me a bowl of meat & I’m happy.” 😂

My gf & I FaceTimed. She said, “I must be too picky, wth is wrong with me.”

I said, “Bxtch you’re askin the girl who’s longest successful relationship has been with a cat named Pete 🐈‍⬛.”  

Laughter is the best medicine😭

Some things I have learned in 38yrs…

✅You can’t send 2 questions to a man in the same msg or next msg before getting a reply to the 1st one. You’ll only get a reply to 1.

✅Stop being the person with a long list of expectations. Just enjoy the experience. If you feel in your gut they’re not someone you vibe with, you don’t owe them a long explanation. Be honest & strong, cut toxicity out of your life. Remember your list of values. 

✅You spend the majority of your day rubbing a piece of glass 🤳🏻 Love life fiercely that’s all that matters.  Not just the highlight reels. You don’t NEED someone to complete you. No one says you have to be married to be happy.

✅Grocery stores should put carts in the middle where my pride realizes I have too much shxt to carry. Dunno, maybe that’s just me🙃 #ThisIsWhyWeCrossFit 

✅Stop thinkin “Nah, they wouldn’t do me like that.” Cause mfs will definitely do you like that. Choose your circle wisely. 

✅Love someone enough their happiness is your happiness. Love them enough to know when you have to let them go. What’s meant for you will never miss you. Take risks.

✅When I was young I wanted  2 kids, a picket fence, & married by 21….lets all laugh together. 😂 Live your own timeline. 

✅Part of me wants to be an independent woman who makes a shxt ton of money & the other part wants to be a trophy wife with new boobs & the most difficult decision of my day being what cocktail I wanna drink. Your wants & needs will change. Let them.😄

✅Beware of cocktails that taste like juice, before you know you it, you’ll have to pick up your dignity down the street. Treat your body like a trash can & you become the trash can. 

✅It’s ok to go thru this phase called “fxck everything.” Do your squats & know your worth. People wanna be around people who bring the joy. Feel the feels but find the sunshine ☀️

Happy Saturday loves, go LAUGH🤍

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How to Love Yourself AND Love the People in Your Life

This morning I read a post by @the.holistic.psychologist that said, “Not everyone wants to get better + & that’s ok. Some people have an identity tied to sickness. Others fear true wellness because it is the unknown + the unknown is unpredictable.”

Ooof. Felt that one in my soul. How about you?

A quote I live by, “At the end of our life, our questions are very simple: Did I live fully? Did I love well?” – Jack Kornfield

Maaaaaaaan have I loved 😆 

Have I always loved well, however? No.

I’ve worked in healthcare for 16 years, a health coach for 6, had I can’t even count how many “failed” (I put this in quotes because it’s only a failure if you failed to learn the lessons 😉) romantic relationships & fizzed out friendships where this statement was applicable at some point.

A big lesson I learned, you can’t fully support &/or love a person for where you want them to be — you have to meet them where they are now.

No matter what type of relationship we’re talkin about. You can’t discount yourself based upon someone else’s potential. You only have the experience right now.

I don’t care if you’re a coach, doctor, married, divorced, partnered, a friend or family relationship — you can’t wish someone well, they HAVE to do the work & want to do/get better. 

I brain dumped.

What can I teach you guys today that I wished I had known decades ago? And I’m still learning right along with y’all…

Here goes…

How to Love Yourself AND Love the People in Your Life:

1.) Always be honest no matter how bad it hurts.

2.) The true mark of expansion, self love, peace, & evolvement is recognizing someone else’s happiness is your happiness even if that means making a hard decision & lovingly letting them go.

3.) Tell people how brilliant & able they are. Sometimes they don’t see it for themselves. Kindness is always cool. Remember the Golden Rule✨

4.) It is possible to love someone but not be in love with them. You determine what kind of relationship you want, be HONEST.

5.) Be authentic. Give others the gift of the real you & a real relationship. Don’t people please + change yourself for any kind of relationship. It will always come back & bite you in the a$$.

6.) Listen more than you talk. People want to be seen, heard, loved, supported, & appreciated. And remember, the most interesting person in the room is the person who is the most interested. Ask questions.

7.) Be giving, but never sacrifice or compromise your integrity or authenticity. Boundaries change lives for the better. Strengthen yours.

8.) Always live by your values. Thoughts become things. What you focus on, you attract. Your habits & people you surround yourself make you. Choose wisely. 

I’ve been re-reading the book, The Vortex. Incredible life changing gems in this one. I’ll highlight a few:

— You can get to where you want to be from where ever you are — but you must stop spending so much time noticing & talking about what you do not like about where you are. 

— Be a more selective sifter, and make a list of the positive things you are living & the qualities of people you love to surround yourself with. 

— Look forward to where you want to be & spend no time complaining about where you are. The responsive Universe makes no distinction between the thoughts you think about your current reality & what you think as you dream of your improved life. You are creating by virtue of what you are thinking about.

— Your sense of who you really are pulses so powerfully within you that you must always continue to reach for satisfying relationships, because you understand, at very deep levels, the potential for joy contained in relationships with others. 

— Once you decide that your happiness depends on the intentions, beliefs, or behaviors of no other, but only upon your own alignment — over which you have complete control — then your relationships will not only no longer be uncomfortable, but they will be deeply satisfying. 

Now, put these gems 💎 in your front pocket & go out & LOVE somebody today, especially YOURSELF!

Oxox Coach K

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Leverage the Power of Your Thoughts and Watch How They Change Your Life

I invested $224 on a @scentsy order from a coworker just starting her side hustle last week.

She’s SO excited & eager.

I can see the sparkle ✨ of hustle in her eyes. My fellow entrepreneurs, you know what I’m talkin about: those dreamy, first time virgin optimism I’m gonna hustle&grind till I bleed, feels.

You also know what it feels like to think you’re a failure, not good enough, & an ‘imposter.’

So I wanted to do something nice for her like others had done for me in the past — build her confidence.

She said, “I took a chance, I dunno if I can do it.” 🤷‍♀️

I sat down.

I explained the power of her thoughts & vibration. She had to believe she was worthy & successful for the Universe to bring the right people & opportunities. 

It takes aligned thoughts, feelings, & ACTION — not from a place of desperation or lack but of ease & abundance.

Did I need said $224 worth of the scent ‘Mystery Man’ in my life? 

Maybe, maybe not 😂

Girls you know what I’m talkin about — God love the scent of a nice smelling man.

Am I right?!

Like not the ‘walking by Abercrombie & Hollister, overpowering, tryin too hard’ scent but the ‘confident, walking on the line of arrogance, sharp dressed man’ scent 🤤 Think Mr. Big. All my ‘Sex & the City’ 🌃 📺 👠 fans.

https://sexandthecity.fandom.com/wiki/Mr._Big

Anyways, got carried away… 😆

Someone stole my Fitbit watch last week as well. My fault, left it in the sauna bathroom when I changed. You would think most people would turn an item like that in.

They notified me no one turned it in. I replied, “That’s OK! I suppose someone needed my watch more than I did.” They were surprised with my response.

You see I’m grateful someone got pleasure out of me leaving my watch, & I’m grateful I have the finances to purchase another one, which is supporting someone else’s job too.

Look for the 💫 gold linings y’all & do something nice for someone. Your life will be so much sweeter.

And now…I can walk in my apartment to the delectable aroma of my Mystery Man ❤️🤗 

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3 Hard Truths To Take With You Into 2021

I read, “You’re never going to be 100% ready and it’s never going to be just the right time, but that’s the point. It means that every moment is also the right moment. If you want it, you just have to do it.”

Hi five to whomever wrote that.🙋‍♀️ 

You wanna know why it’s so hard to get what you want (or what you think you want)?

Fear.

Doesn’t matter if it’s losing weight, talking to a person you like, moving, asking for a raise or going after that job you want.

Muscle ups scare the shit out of me but I commit to practicing relentlessly because I believe in my ability and deservingness of having what I want out of life.

**Some hard truths to take with you into 2021**

1.) You have a short term attitude that doesn’t align with your long-term intentions

Without a long term intention & approach to anything in life, you’re bound to suffer a rebound when you figure out it isn’t working. It’s that “oh fxck” moment…

How  you respond afterwords determines everything.

Take weight loss for example. Say you go low carb, lose a few pounds of water weight after a couple days, then discover it’s harder than you thought, your body isn’t responding as quickly as you thought — so you go back to old self sabotaging habits.

How about we commit to something more than 2 weeks? Commit, experiment, try & THEN if it’s still not working, it’s OK, be proud of yourself for trying!

Part of success is willingness to take a risk, yet also being smart enough to own it if it’s not working and search for another solution.

2.) You lack a quality support system 

Your environment is everything! Fitness, career, social media, relationship related — doesn’t matter.

Any source that makes you feel bad about yourself and drags your vibration down — get rid of it, unfollow, block, trash it. Replace them with sources and people who are positive & successful & living the life you desire.

I personally have been called a savage for the ability to cut people & things out of my life with no remorse if they are not serving my highest alignment, but guess what? I am a whole hxll of a lot happier because of this skill. Doesn’t mean you have to be an dxck, but be HONEST.

Don’t worry about what other people think of you, you will never be happy if you’re constantly people pleasing. Own your shxt, own your life.

You control your thoughts, environment, and reality of your life. Choose accordingly. 

3.) You lack clarity & don’t really know what you want

Write out your thoughts, feelings, and intentions. Learn to BE with yourself. Align your thoughts & actions accordingly to be the person you want to embody and that life will follow. 

If you’re chronically stressed, sleep deprived, overworked, & talk down to yourself, your life will be a helluva lot harder. 

Set you day up for success. You should have a success routine & habits in place. I wrote a blog just the other day about 8 things you should do every single day to be more successful. I suggest you go back and look at that.

Keeping these 3 hard truths in mind will allow you to create the space to welcome more abundance in your life. 

If you WANT IT, you have to DO IT.

Make yourself proud. 

Oxox Coach K