Love and Life Lessons That Will Make You Laugh

I said, “Well I’m pretty easy to please, don’t tell me what to do, make me laugh, just give me a bowl of meat & I’m happy.” 😂

My gf & I FaceTimed. She said, “I must be too picky, wth is wrong with me.”

I said, “Bxtch you’re askin the girl who’s longest successful relationship has been with a cat named Pete 🐈‍⬛.”  

Laughter is the best medicine😭

Some things I have learned in 38yrs…

✅You can’t send 2 questions to a man in the same msg or next msg before getting a reply to the 1st one. You’ll only get a reply to 1.

✅Stop being the person with a long list of expectations. Just enjoy the experience. If you feel in your gut they’re not someone you vibe with, you don’t owe them a long explanation. Be honest & strong, cut toxicity out of your life. Remember your list of values. 

✅You spend the majority of your day rubbing a piece of glass 🤳🏻 Love life fiercely that’s all that matters.  Not just the highlight reels. You don’t NEED someone to complete you. No one says you have to be married to be happy.

✅Grocery stores should put carts in the middle where my pride realizes I have too much shxt to carry. Dunno, maybe that’s just me🙃 #ThisIsWhyWeCrossFit 

✅Stop thinkin “Nah, they wouldn’t do me like that.” Cause mfs will definitely do you like that. Choose your circle wisely. 

✅Love someone enough their happiness is your happiness. Love them enough to know when you have to let them go. What’s meant for you will never miss you. Take risks.

✅When I was young I wanted  2 kids, a picket fence, & married by 21….lets all laugh together. 😂 Live your own timeline. 

✅Part of me wants to be an independent woman who makes a shxt ton of money & the other part wants to be a trophy wife with new boobs & the most difficult decision of my day being what cocktail I wanna drink. Your wants & needs will change. Let them.😄

✅Beware of cocktails that taste like juice, before you know you it, you’ll have to pick up your dignity down the street. Treat your body like a trash can & you become the trash can. 

✅It’s ok to go thru this phase called “fxck everything.” Do your squats & know your worth. People wanna be around people who bring the joy. Feel the feels but find the sunshine ☀️

Happy Saturday loves, go LAUGH🤍