Category: Personal Development

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70% of leadership is this

70% of leadership is how you lead yourself. There is a difference between leadership & management just like there’s a difference between preaching & practicing what you preach.

I strive to be the best woman I can be for others & myself. Has nothing to do with perfection, everything about effort & intention. 

Just like fitness, sharing a snippet of mine this morning with the 7am squad! Brutal.

videos here

I want to be a human that when someone talks about me I would hope that they would say she makes me want to be a better person. 

Had plenty of wake up calls where I asked myself a few things:

  • How do you maintain positivity in the face of negativity? 
  • How do you set goals & a plan to accomplish those goals?
  • When do you stay committed to yourself despite lack of motivation or shade from others?

People will follow you if you give them a purposeful reason to. That is the foundation that 70% of leadership for yourself is built on.

I feel there are 3 kinds of leadership:

1️⃣Physical leadership: Are you healthy & happy & nourished body, mind, & spirit to be strong & serve as a role model to others?

2️⃣Mental leadership: social media brainwashes you & continuously puts what you want to see in front of you. What are you clicking on, subjecting yourself to, & what are you consuming?

Find the people you want to be like, that you want to embody so you can learn from them & be better. Release the individuals who don’t take you where you want to go.

3️⃣Emotional leadership: The ability to stay balanced & even keeled. Choosing positivity in the face of negativity.

Watch your thoughts. Watch your words. Know your mission & values.

Your mission should be built on the foundation of your values. 

So what are your values? 

Mine: Service. Health. Wealth & Freedom. Self Nourishment. Extraordinary Relationships.

So with that, I’ll step off my soapbox🤗 

“Be who you are and say how you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.” Dr. Seuss 

I love you all!

Oxox 

Coach K

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Things I had to do to lose body fat and achieve a healthier lean physique

The majority of your questions today revolved around: macros, daily routine, changes that made the biggest impact on fat loss & my transformation, & workouts. 

Y’all I simply consistently eat meat & lift things. I’ve shifted my focus however completely from fitness & aesthetic goals to my career & longevity the past couple years.⁣

Some things that haven’t changed are the facts I still have Crohn’s (although in remission & med free), & life still takes consistency & intention.

I know many of you are struggling right now…with all kinds of stuff like life, health & fitness, maybe relationships too.

One of the best question asked today was, “How do YOU stay committed & consistent?⁣

I replied, “Commitment is defined as a willingness to give your time & energy into something you believe in, a promise or firm decision to do something.⁣”⁣

What more worthy thing to believe in, commit to, & invest in than yourself & your health?

The process…⁣

1. Truly look at yourself & current state. What are your goals/desires? What do you need to improve to move the needle forward?⁣

If you’re clearly not where you want to be, you need to own that. It is not anyone else’s fault but yours. You control your reality.

Picture your future self & condition. What thoughts & reality do you want to grow? How would you feel? Really visualize this as luscious & vibrant as possible. This is massively impactful, because it’s going to create possibility & self belief.⁣

A practice that helps me visualize & shift my energy to a positive place: I pull up Pinterest & consume positive quotes, images, videos, anything that shifts my state to a happy empowered place.

Swipe save & share! Hope these help!

Link for product info, discount codes & resources here

I’m rooting for you! 

Oxox

Coach K

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I asked an elderly patient what the most important thing she learned in life and this is what she said

Srcubs: Figs

I asked an elderly patient years ago, “What is the most important thing you’ve learned in 85 years?”⁣
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And she said somethin to me I’ll never forget that I also heard on a podcast the other day that brought back this memory, “One of the most important things I’ve learned is health is the crown on the well person’s head that only the sick person can see & wealth comes in many other more important forms than money.”⁣
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Ooooof. Who else felt that? 👋⁣
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She went on to say, “I wished I had changed my perspective sooner. Mostly around the perception of being ‘wealthy’ & the perception that in order to be beautiful I had to be skinny. I realize I was always chasing a goal like being rich & losing as much weight as possible instead of embracing the experiences of the journey & being grateful for what I already had.”⁣
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I don’t know about y’all but I love spending time with the elderly. They’re full of magical wisdom.⁣
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3 things I’ve learned in my 39 yrs on this earth I’ll share with you in hopes of you learning this sooner than I did:⁣
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➡️Joy, purpose, fulfillment (JPF) vs fame, fortune, applause (FFA). Which would you choose? I choose JPF because if you choose JPF the FFA will follow.⁣
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➡️Forms of wealth: self mastery, self awareness, family, health, your craft, personal development, money, time, freedom, charity, adventure, your circle of genius & environment⁣
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➡️Don’t lower your standards or standard of living to meet your income, raise your income & standards of living to meet your standards.⁣
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➡️If you’re gonna chase something, chase service. Because “To live in the hearts we leave behind, is not to die.” – Thomas Campbell.⁣
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We’re all gonna die what are you gonna leave behind? Abs, money in the bank, or the memories of a life well lived?⁣
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Oxox⁣
Coach K⁣
Scrubs: @wearfigs
I’m an XXS top, XXS petite bottom for reference (5’1, 105lbs)

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Social media and Instagram tips! How to share authentically for success

I felt pretty #boilerup In transparency this photo was taken @officialsuntancity ⁣
Yes I occasionally tan, it makes me happy. Not asking for your opinion here😉🤷‍♀️⁣
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I don’t claim to be a business coach or Instagram expert, but I have been an active member on this space for over 10 yrs.⁣
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Had a flood of DM‘s centered around the topic of how to increase influence, exposure, & success via social media.⁣
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Never in a million years did I think my digital platform (& life) would grow to where it is today. I’m flattered this many people actually give a sh*t as to what I have to share. Grateful to have y’all as part of my digital family!⁣
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Y’all know I’m a responder by nature when it comes to communication. I like to provide what you want, so here are a few lessons I’ve learned along my journey in this digital world I feel you can also apply to life in various facets. Take what you need❤️⁣
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Above all➡️consistency & realness are🔑⁣
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You don’t need perfect photos or a professional photographer. Be creative. They make incredible phone cameras. Show up authentically!⁣
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I love photo shoots personally, they give me such a sense of love & appreciation for myself as well as other people’s creative gifts, but they’re not necessary for credibility or worth nor do you need to do this to prove yourself. You don’t owe anyone anything.⁣
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People wanna see the real you. And if you ask yourself, “What would people say if they met me in ‘real life’ vs social media?” & it isn’t a response of, “She/He is exactly how they are on social media!” — you have an issue & inner work to do.⁣
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Like assessing: your integrity, values, who’s the human you wish to be, what message are you spreading & why, is it from ego, what is your purpose, do you have past trauma to nurture & heal?⁣
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⬆️ the BIGGIE.⁣
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Swipe for other quick tips jotted down on IG
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Know that I love & appreciate all of you! I want you to be confident in believing your story matters, your voice matters, & the opinions of others don’t matter. What matters is you lead with love, purpose, & it sets your soul on fire❤️‍🔥

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Why you need to chase what lights you up

The question I want you to ask yourself today is what lights you up? 

Why you ask?

Because what’s embedded in your responses lies your answers.

I’ll share some of mine & stories you might relate to as well…

➡️I love money.

I didn’t always have a good relationship with money nor believed I was worthy of it. In fact I had a scarcity mindset the majority of my life. In the past few years I’ve learned I need to nurture my relationship with money just like any other.

Money gives me time, freedom, the ability to give back & invest in others. It gives me the ability to give myself things that light me up which in turn give me the energy & happiness to serve at my best.

I changed my story from the thoughts of “I’m greedy & money is bad.” to “I am worthy, smart, & compassionate because I know without money I’m not able to serve others or myself at my fullest capacity.”

➡️I love my health.

I know without my health I also cannot function at my highest capacity physically, mentally emotionally, intellectually, or financially. 

This is why I work out 5d/week & eat food that nourishes my body to help me perform at my best. This also means taking time to rest. If you want to be a top-notch athlete you need to live & think like one.

➡️I love my relationships.

Without community connection in some way shape or form we lose our sense of purpose. Be mindful of the company you keep, make sure to surround yourself & consume an upleveling environment.

We were put here to learn, connect, live with Joy, & follow what lights us up.

The truth is we often forget by doing what light us up that is the fastest way to bring the abundance flow back to you.

It’s never too late to rewrite your story & I’ll remind you that there’s nothing enlightening about resisting pleasure, money, your health, etc & turning down the beauty in your heart.

“Don’t ask what the world needs, ask what makes you come alive & go do that, because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” -Howard Thurman

#mindsetmonday

Oxox Coach K 

☕️: @trustwealthstrategies

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How to live life like Dolly Parton

Big @dollyparton energy today y’all✨ 

I enjoyed these quotes this mornin & I hope they set the stage for your week (& the rest of your life).

I watched a Netflix documentary about Dolly – she’s a magical human y’all.

I’m in love with her bling, flare, essence of unapologetically being herself, her femininity & her get shit done attitude! #girlcrush #rolemodel 

Minus the boobs, I dunno how she functions in those things. Props ✊ Proud card toting member of the #ittybittytittyCommittee here 👋 🎟 

It made me want to continue to live life BIG.

To attract my dreams. 

I no longer say “chase” because a high value human doesn’t chase anything, you become what you want & you ATTRACT what is meant for you. – write that down 😉✍🏼 

And these…

Living a BIG life requires:

not being afraid to shine

being YOU

giving less fux

not playing small

& not chronically trying to shrink yourself in every facet of that statement

Put your crown on 👑

Get your beauty sleep🥰

Pose in your underwear, whatever tf you wanna do. 

I’m sure I’ll get hate messages for it & you know what?! Thank you. 

Because if they ain’t talkin about you you ain’t doin something right. – words of wisdom from my momma

I crushed almost 9 hrs last night, no ragrets. Pampered myself instead of going out, & I realized as I’ve gotten older it feels so much better to wake up refreshed🤘🏻

Gonna get in a good workout

Gonna spend the day with friends & family gloriously watching sports & enjoying life!

Rooting for my Purdue Boilers!

I dunno who to choose in the playoffs, great teams! Going with the Bengals & 49ers, how bout you?

Enough rambling, swipe away, words of wisdom from the Queen!

I hope you have the most magical, refreshing Sunday ever!

Oxox Coach K

#boilerup 

On Faith

“If I can hold God’s attention, I can hold the world’s.”

On Believing In Yourself

“The magic is inside you, there ain’t no crystal ball.”

On Work

In her book Dream More, Parton wrote, “I never have considered myself a perfectionist, but I do think of myself as a ‘professionalist’…I always strive simply to be my very best.”

On Ambition

“Tumble outta bed and I stumble to the kitchen. Pour myself a cup of ambition.”

On Life

In July 2019, Parton tweeted: “If you see someone without a smile today, give ’em yours.”

On Diamonds

“I look totally artificial, but I am totally real, as a writer, as a professional, as a human being. A rhinestone shines just as good as a diamond.”

On Love

I’ve had to go against all kinds of people through the years just to be myself. I think everybody should be allowed to be who they are, and to love who they love.”

On Life

“Everybody has their own journey, they have their own way of doing things. And who am I to judge?”

On Marriage

“He’s always loved who I was, and I loved who he was, and we never tried to change each other,” Parton said about her

husband Carl Thomas Dean, in the June 2016 issue of O, The Oprah Magazine.

On Real Beauty

“You don’t have to look like everybody else. You don’t have to be a raving beauty to be special and to be beautiful.”

On Life

“I make a point to appreciate all the little things in my life. I go out and smell the air after a good, hard rain. These small actions help remind me that there are so many great, glorious pieces of good in the world.”

On Work

“I always count my blessings more than I count my money. I don’t work for money, never did.”

On Life

“Everybody’s life is a soap opera. Everybody’s life is a country western song, depends on who’s writing it.”

On Diets

In her book Dolly: My Life and Other Unfinished Business, Parton joked, “I tried every diet in the book. I tried some that weren’t in the book. I tried eating the book. It tasted better than most of the diets.”

On Life

“Find out who you are and do it on purpose.”

On Stardom

“I’m just a working girl. I never think of myself as a star because, as somebody once said, ‘A star is nothing but a big ball of gas’–and I don’t want to be that.”

On Work

“I’m not going to limit myself just because people won’t accept the fact that I can do something else.”

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When your problems seem too big I want you to remember this, PLUS, things I learned in college

You know those days where your problems seem GINORMOUS? Or you just feel frustrated & agitated af & don’t know why? 

Love my career! Although I didn’t go to Purdue specifically for radiology, I still got a BS degree in Science. Still consider West Lafayette my home away from home & a piece of my heart will always be there.

— I feel you. I feel I’m dippin my toes again into a big pool of transition. Ugh, times like these are heavy & almost suffocating. I’m blaming it on #mercuryretrograde 

I came across an astronomy account called @astronomybasics Y’all, my inner Purdue science nerd geeks out on this stuff. I love it! This post shared facts about 2 black holes, called “binary black holes” because they orbit each other. They’re BIG & beautiful & 1.3 billion light years away. 

How freaking amazing is this????!!!!!!

Makes you & your human “problems” seem small & silly, right?! 

I remember in college worrying about the stupidest sh*t…like lookin fat in my outfit for Thursday nights at the Neon Cactus or the big fraternity party that week. I don’t know if anyone else experienced looking at a picture after your freshman year & cringing because you realize you gained the freshman 15 (or 20 in my case). 

Forever Grateful, Forever True!

I remember my brother telling me how much “bigger” I was. OMG I wanted to hide in shame & thought life was over.

Since we’re on the subject of #collegelife looking back on my 4 years at Purdue, I realize how many countless hours I spent in the classroom & studying for tests. (Ok, maybe I didn’t spend AS much time on those things as keg stands, flippy cup, & Greek events, but alas, it added up & I still made Dean’s list.)

When I think about all that time I spent working toward my degree, I wonder, what did it really leave me with? A piece of paper that will continue to gather dust?

I thought harder…my dudes, I learned so much more via college experiences than academics. I’ll share a few with you & hopefully they spark introspection & give a sense of peace wherever you are right now…

Swipe & share with your friends on Instagram!

Ps #boilerup 🖤💛🤍

  • No one gives a sh*t about your GPA, people care more about how you make them feel, your integrity & effort.
  • Learn self discipline, ain’t nobody here to hold your hand. Work smarter not harder.
  • Just when you think a mf won’t do you like that, they def will do you like that. It be that way sometimes. Watch your words, be picky about the company you keep.
  • Care for something other than yourself, but not more than you care for yourself.
  • Big friend circles don’t mean you’re cooler or loved more. Your circles will become smaller as you get older & that’s ok. Make sure you surround yourself with people smarter & more successful than you.
  • Real independence is found in being comfortable alone, on your own without needing someone with you to stabilize you. Realize being independent doesn’t mean you’re not smart enough to delegate & ask for help.
  • It’s easy to think that there should be more people like you in the world, but once you open your mind to groups of unfamiliar people, you become able to see that our differences are what make humanity so beautiful.
  • As I matured in college & life, I began to see my parents as people, instead of just “my parents.” I began to appreciate them for who they are, their experiences, sacrifices, & realize they’re constantly evolving & learning just like me.
  • It is impossible to hold on to everything in your life; sometimes, you have to burn bridges & move on, others you learn to lovingly release & let go. As Dylan McKay once said, “May the bridges I burn light my way.”
  • Say NO. I used to be the girl who couldn’t say, no — until I had to. Life places demands on you that can be detrimental. You do not have time for everything & you will never please everyone. Saying “no” isn’t about being weak, missing out or offending others, it’s about being smart & understanding what’s meant for you.
  • Dream BIG. College showed me a little piece of the world, & that little piece was enough to teach me to dream of bigger & better possibilities.
  • Create your own possibilities & live life to the fullest because our time here is tiny & short & so are we in this Universe.

oxox Coach K

#lifeinmy20s #lifequotes #purdue #lafayetteblogger #purdueblogger #womeninhealthcare #purduealum #lifeatpurdue #lifelessonslearnedthehardway #lifelessons #lifeadvice #spreadpositivity #dating #carnivorediet #carnivorewomen #catmom #plantmom #lilbitoffit #girlswholift #indyblogger #singlelife #midwestblogger #indianablogger #datinginyour30s #datinginyour40s #relationshipgoals #purduedg #boilerup

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What old facebook memories taught me about adulting & aging gracefully

Cringe worthy.

Like, “Dear Baby Jesus, did I really put that out in the world?” SMDH

My old social media posts, ESPECIALLY those on Facebook often make me wanna hide underneath a rock. On the other hand, some make me smile, some laugh, some wonder if I even had a brain or any sense of style. Those you see & you’re like, “WTF was I wearing &/or WTF was I thinking dating that person?!”

Come on, laugh, let the WTF’s flow! Judgment free zone!

As I’ve aged & became more comfortable & in love with myself, I realized they are also clues & puzzle pieces to the way I absorbed the world, evolved, & learned to eventually (hopefully), more successfully navigate as an adult.

Don’t know bout ch’all but I still feel like I’m a kid. I remember when I thought 30 was old & by 40 all the fun sh*t was over.

Hell I’m just gettin started!

I don’t consume much social media nowadays as compared to when I’d scroll endlessly without INTENT. Key word – Intent.

I use it more for content creation & connection. It is easy to get sucked into the rabbit hole. Be careful to not place your worth in your profiles. I enjoy using mine as an educational tool & expressive extension of my personality, but I choose not to use it as a barometer of my worth, existence, or social resume.

The other day tho, up popped a FB memory that went back 16 years to when I was married, unhappy, confused af, an addict to food, alcohol, & toting around a sh*tty midset, “shoulding” all over myself. 

It read, “Fck this adulting, bout to get fckedddd up!”

Welp, glad my use of sentence enhancers haven’t changed.

But instead of feeling shameful, this 39 year old human felt such a sense of pride & gratitude. Pride for how much I’ve grown & gratitude for this space in life, in time – with all of you!

I know y’all relate to this too. Just wanted to check in with ya in hopes you’re also sittin in this space of awareness, love, & acceptance instead of shame, sadness, & regret.

Laugh y’all! Life is meant to be lived in JOY! No ragrets.

Anyone wanna share your “walls of shame?”

Oxox Coach K

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Full body workout routine plus the top tips that helped me lose the most weight

Q: I only have 2-3 days to work out a week? Any tips on workouts I can do? And what changes helped you lose the most weight? ➡️Swipe, save, tag & share!⁣
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Here’s a very basic but solid full body program example if you’re planning on resistance training & working out 2-3 d/wk.⁣
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You don’t need to make training overly complicated nor do you have to excessively do cardio & HIIT. Stick to walking & basic movements focusing on getting stronger with each of them.⁣
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Most of us want to save time & get in & out of the gym as quick as possible without sacrificing workout efficacy.⁣
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I put 2 exercises back to back to make 3 simple super sets. Aim to do each super set for 4 sets of 8-12 reps – slowly with good form. ⁣
Form always 1st before adding more weight to prevent injury.⁣
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Take 1-2 minute rest between sets in order to ensure adequate recovery.⁣
I know this is the hardest part for some of you, including myself. It’s hard to beat the crossfitter out of you when you’re focusing on bodybuilding. 😂 🏋🏼‍♀️⁣
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Gradually increase weights each week. If you’re consistent, you can switch up your workout after 4-6 weeks. ⁣
No one says you have to switch up your workout if this is working for you either. Go your own way as with everything in Food, Fitness, & Life. ⁣


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If you’re looking for a step by step plan to lose weight, actually keep it off, & improve gut issues &/or emotional issues with food, apply for a consultation in the link in my IG bio. ⁣
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Can’t afford coaching?⁣
I created a 354 page guide that will teach you anything you need to know about meat, macros, & getting the body you deserve❤️ Also in the link in my bio👩🏼‍💻📲⁣ link here

Oxox Coach K

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Sunday ponderings and the intimacy of being alone

The intimacy of being by yourself isn’t intimacy most can grasp or understand. The silence & how your energy isn’t affected by anything else is a sense of peace & freedom like no other. 

Embracing who you are when no one is looking & not worrying about what other people think of you. I realized actually how much I loved myself, how I’m my own best friend via swimming in the intimacy of being by myself. 

And that has allowed me a happiness, sense of joy & openness to receive as well as give on a level I never thought it was possible. #sundaymorningview #sundayponderings

Cheers to the final day of my 4, 12 hour shifts in a row. Dear baby Jesus I see light at the end of the tunnel 🙏 💀 ⚡️ 

I wanna hear your Sunday ponderings below. I know some of these you guys will relate to. I hope you laugh. 

Laughter is the best medicine ❤️ but most of all I hope it gets you thinking & appreciating your journey & the person you are becoming!👇

  • I Love a fun Texter. Like throw some GIFs in there. You can never have too many emojis. Sprinkle a lil video or audio messages every now & then. But don’t blow up my phone all day. Instant anxiety for the responder in me.
  • Life hack. If you use your weekends building the life & the person you want you won’t have to spend your weekends trying to escape reality.
  • Whatever you are not changing you are choosing. Read that again.
  • Are you making the decision because it’s what you truly want or because you fear something else? Maybe even something better? But the fear of the unknown is outweighing what your gut & heart are trying to tell you.
  • Don’t let loneliness make you reconnect with toxic people. You wouldn’t drink poison just because you’re thirsty.
  • Delete, unfollow, block, unfriend, erase, & disconnect from anyone & anything that robs you of your peace, love, & happiness.  On social media & in real life. You don’t need to be around people & things not on your level & don’t appreciate your value.
  • It’s not your job to fix & detox people. It is your job to detox the part of you that relates to the toxicity & what needs fixed. 
  • If you’re going thru hell keep going because why would you want to stop there?

Love y’all & wishing you the happiest of Sundays! Oxoxo Coach K