Category: Relationships

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Love and Life Lessons That Will Make You Laugh

I said, “Well I’m pretty easy to please, don’t tell me what to do, make me laugh, just give me a bowl of meat & I’m happy.” 😂

My gf & I FaceTimed. She said, “I must be too picky, wth is wrong with me.”

I said, “Bxtch you’re askin the girl who’s longest successful relationship has been with a cat named Pete 🐈‍⬛.”  

Laughter is the best medicine😭

Some things I have learned in 38yrs…

✅You can’t send 2 questions to a man in the same msg or next msg before getting a reply to the 1st one. You’ll only get a reply to 1.

✅Stop being the person with a long list of expectations. Just enjoy the experience. If you feel in your gut they’re not someone you vibe with, you don’t owe them a long explanation. Be honest & strong, cut toxicity out of your life. Remember your list of values. 

✅You spend the majority of your day rubbing a piece of glass 🤳🏻 Love life fiercely that’s all that matters.  Not just the highlight reels. You don’t NEED someone to complete you. No one says you have to be married to be happy.

✅Grocery stores should put carts in the middle where my pride realizes I have too much shxt to carry. Dunno, maybe that’s just me🙃 #ThisIsWhyWeCrossFit 

✅Stop thinkin “Nah, they wouldn’t do me like that.” Cause mfs will definitely do you like that. Choose your circle wisely. 

✅Love someone enough their happiness is your happiness. Love them enough to know when you have to let them go. What’s meant for you will never miss you. Take risks.

✅When I was young I wanted  2 kids, a picket fence, & married by 21….lets all laugh together. 😂 Live your own timeline. 

✅Part of me wants to be an independent woman who makes a shxt ton of money & the other part wants to be a trophy wife with new boobs & the most difficult decision of my day being what cocktail I wanna drink. Your wants & needs will change. Let them.😄

✅Beware of cocktails that taste like juice, before you know you it, you’ll have to pick up your dignity down the street. Treat your body like a trash can & you become the trash can. 

✅It’s ok to go thru this phase called “fxck everything.” Do your squats & know your worth. People wanna be around people who bring the joy. Feel the feels but find the sunshine ☀️

Happy Saturday loves, go LAUGH🤍

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How to Love Yourself AND Love the People in Your Life

This morning I read a post by @the.holistic.psychologist that said, “Not everyone wants to get better + & that’s ok. Some people have an identity tied to sickness. Others fear true wellness because it is the unknown + the unknown is unpredictable.”

Ooof. Felt that one in my soul. How about you?

A quote I live by, “At the end of our life, our questions are very simple: Did I live fully? Did I love well?” – Jack Kornfield

Maaaaaaaan have I loved 😆 

Have I always loved well, however? No.

I’ve worked in healthcare for 16 years, a health coach for 6, had I can’t even count how many “failed” (I put this in quotes because it’s only a failure if you failed to learn the lessons 😉) romantic relationships & fizzed out friendships where this statement was applicable at some point.

A big lesson I learned, you can’t fully support &/or love a person for where you want them to be — you have to meet them where they are now.

No matter what type of relationship we’re talkin about. You can’t discount yourself based upon someone else’s potential. You only have the experience right now.

I don’t care if you’re a coach, doctor, married, divorced, partnered, a friend or family relationship — you can’t wish someone well, they HAVE to do the work & want to do/get better. 

I brain dumped.

What can I teach you guys today that I wished I had known decades ago? And I’m still learning right along with y’all…

Here goes…

How to Love Yourself AND Love the People in Your Life:

1.) Always be honest no matter how bad it hurts.

2.) The true mark of expansion, self love, peace, & evolvement is recognizing someone else’s happiness is your happiness even if that means making a hard decision & lovingly letting them go.

3.) Tell people how brilliant & able they are. Sometimes they don’t see it for themselves. Kindness is always cool. Remember the Golden Rule✨

4.) It is possible to love someone but not be in love with them. You determine what kind of relationship you want, be HONEST.

5.) Be authentic. Give others the gift of the real you & a real relationship. Don’t people please + change yourself for any kind of relationship. It will always come back & bite you in the a$$.

6.) Listen more than you talk. People want to be seen, heard, loved, supported, & appreciated. And remember, the most interesting person in the room is the person who is the most interested. Ask questions.

7.) Be giving, but never sacrifice or compromise your integrity or authenticity. Boundaries change lives for the better. Strengthen yours.

8.) Always live by your values. Thoughts become things. What you focus on, you attract. Your habits & people you surround yourself make you. Choose wisely. 

I’ve been re-reading the book, The Vortex. Incredible life changing gems in this one. I’ll highlight a few:

— You can get to where you want to be from where ever you are — but you must stop spending so much time noticing & talking about what you do not like about where you are. 

— Be a more selective sifter, and make a list of the positive things you are living & the qualities of people you love to surround yourself with. 

— Look forward to where you want to be & spend no time complaining about where you are. The responsive Universe makes no distinction between the thoughts you think about your current reality & what you think as you dream of your improved life. You are creating by virtue of what you are thinking about.

— Your sense of who you really are pulses so powerfully within you that you must always continue to reach for satisfying relationships, because you understand, at very deep levels, the potential for joy contained in relationships with others. 

— Once you decide that your happiness depends on the intentions, beliefs, or behaviors of no other, but only upon your own alignment — over which you have complete control — then your relationships will not only no longer be uncomfortable, but they will be deeply satisfying. 

Now, put these gems 💎 in your front pocket & go out & LOVE somebody today, especially YOURSELF!

Oxox Coach K

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The World’s Six Best Doctors by Steve Jobs

As the sun sets in Steve Job’s Life, he gave the world one last gift. “The World’s six best Doctors” – by Steve Jobs.

 As I walked in the sun yesterday, enjoying the warmth on my face, I reread this essay. I let the words that resonated with me sink in….

ox Enjoy!

This is his final essay:

I reached the pinnacle of success in the business world.  In some others’ eyes, my life is the epitome of success. However, aside from work, I have little joy. In the end, my wealth is only a fact of life that I am accustomed to. At this moment, lying on my bed and recalling my life, I realize that all the recognition and wealth that I took so much pride in have paled and become meaningless in the face of my death. 

 You can employ someone to drive the car for you, make money for you but you cannot have someone bear your sickness for you. Material things lost can be found or replaced. But there is one thing that can never be found when it’s lost – Life. 

Whichever stage in life you are in right now, with time, you will face the day when the curtain comes down.  Treasure love for your family, love for your spouse, love for your friends.

Treat yourself well and cherish others. 

As we grow older, and hopefully wiser, we realize that a $300 or a $30 watch both tell the same time.  You will realize that your true inner happiness does not come from the material things of this world. Whether you fly first class or economy, if the plane goes down – you go down with it.  

 Therefore, I hope you realize, when you have mates, buddies and old friends, brothers and sisters, who you chat with, laugh with, talk with, sing songs with, talk about north-south-east-west or heaven and earth, that is true happiness! 

Don’t educate your children to be rich.  Educate them to be happy. So when they grow up they will know the value of things and not the price. 

Eat your food as your medicine, otherwise you have to eat medicine as your food. 

 The One who loves you will never leave you for another because, even if there are 100 reasons to give up, he or she will find a reason to hold on.

There is a big difference between a human being and being human.  Only a few really understand it. 

You are loved when you are born.  You will be loved when you die. In between, you have to manage! 

 The six best doctors in the world are – sunlight, rest, exercise, diet, self-confidence and friends. 

Maintain them in all stages and enjoy a healthy life!!

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The Best Love Advice No One Told You

Heart wrenching conversation with a client yesterday I’m certain all of us have encountered & then realized how interconnected emotions & outcomes are.

She told me, she knows he doesn’t love her for her, but she keeps holding on which is affecting her weight & basically everything else in her life.

So I started off with this: Our job on this earth is not to have to sell or transform ourselves to earn someone’s love. It’s just to simply be loved for exactly who we are & we are to do the same.

Relationships & your worth are determined by your own definition, not society’s definition or timelines you think you need to be living.

I’ve said this before, I fully stand by it, people can choose to evolve with you or without you in any kind of relationship, romantic or platonic.

The people you surround yourself with,  make you. They are a reflection of your values & integrity.

It’s OK to grow out of relationships. It’s OK if those people choose to part. It takes a BIG, evolved person to lovingly release someone you care deeply for.

You can’t build a relationship with a person you love for who you want them to be. 

Honor your individuality. 

Don’t be afraid to take chances on experiences if they feel right, don’t hoard shame if they didn’t work out the way you thought. 

Be proud of yourself for choosing love, especially love for yourself. It’s the only relationship you’re going to have forever. If you’re not happy, you’re not going to make anyone else happy. The negative energy you put out if you don’t feel aligned will only further grow & bring more negative.

It’s pretty simple really. Give love away like there are no conditions attached, and this goes for letting it go too. By doing this we enable the alignment & flow that is supposed to happen in this life experience.

You can begin creating the life, body, & love you desire right now, even if you don’t have the pieces in place you think you need in order to start. 

All it takes is acceptance, intention, effort, & LOVE.

Love & Hugs 🤗❤️ oxoxo

Feature Photo: @matteuccij13 @lensandlightphoto

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31 Powerful Affirmations For Every Area Of Your Life

Snowpocalypse ❄️ 2021 #indianaproblems

Many of you are stuck inside. Which means we’re snuggled up to our emotions. Yikes right?!

If that’s you, here are:

31 Powerful Affirmations For Every Area Of Your Life 

— medium.com  (fav!)

You can book mark these for later on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/p/CLWreaPj_Bv/?igshid=1aeddpziw8f1n


Money

  1. Money comes to me easily and effortlessly.
  2. I constantly attract opportunities that create more money.
  3. I am worthy of making more money.
  4. I am open and receptive to all the wealth life offers me.
  5. My actions create constant prosperity.
  6. Money and spirituality can co-exist in harmony.

Love & Relationships

7. I am full of positive loving energy.

8. I welcome love and romance into my life.

9. I am in a loving and supportive relationship.

10. I deserve love and I get it in abundance.

11. I am loved, loving and lovable.

12. I am blessed with an incredible family and wonderful friends.

13. I give out love and it is returned to me multiplied manyfold.

Self

14. I forgive myself and set myself free.

15. I believe I can be all that I want to be.

16. I am in the process of becoming the best version of myself.

17. I have the freedom & power to create the life I desire.

18. I choose to be kind to myself and love myself unconditionally.

19. My possibilities are endless.

20. I am worthy of my dreams.

21. I am enough.

Health

22. I deserve to be healthy and feel good.

23. I am full of energy and vitality and my mind is calm and peaceful.

24. Every day I am getting healthier and stronger.

25. I honor my body by trusting the signals that it sends me.

26. I manifest perfect health by making smart choices.

Happiness

27. I am grateful to be alive. It is my joy and pleasure to live another wonderful day.

28. Happiness is my birthright. I choose to be happy and I deserve to be happy.

29. Being happy comes easy to me. Happiness is my second nature.

30. Good things are happening.

31. I am deeply fulfilled by what I do.

Oxox Be safe! Coach K

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The One Thing You Need To Control For Success

It didn’t work out how I thought it would…

…Monday morning.

Got up at 4am, went to the gym expecting a 5am workout, not sure what happened but no one was there to open the gym. Shxt happens, right?! 

So I thought, I can choose to be angry or I can choose Plan B & not let emotions control me.

I’m a big believer in the Universe gives you what you need for your highest alignment, always.

Repeat after me, “Things happen FOR  me not TO me.”

I chose plan B. Went to @hotworx.fishers & got in an amazing hot cycle active recovery day. This is probably the Universe telling me I needed to take it easy.

Read an article on investing this morning, now I know nothing about stocks & investing, but I’ve always been intrigued. So I’m taking aligned action to learn. Work smarter not harder. It’s time I learn & not fear.

Oh and before I forget, 2 questions I learned that will help you avoid conflict in your relationship with yourself & others:

1.) Does your EARNING power or SAVING power make you feel more safe & secured?

(Helpful with saving and spending habits)

2.) Do you want SUPPORT or a SOLUTION?

(Helpful when facing a problem)

I felt these were huge & wanted to share.

Our differences and not letting emotions control us apply to us all because the same secrets can be applied to your fitness journeys, money journeys, relationship journeys, healing journeys — you name it.

This article was talking about the secret to staying IN THE GAME. That’s the key to wealth building.

And that secret is learning how to control your emotions and not let them control you.

Stoicism at its finest. Love it, big fan. 

LIFE in general, I feel is like 5% theory, 5% execution, & 90% managing your emotions. Similar to the article I read this morning.

The THEORY part, you can learn and research all the things, but if you don’t take aligned action you’re still going to be in the same place. 

This applies to money, love, & health. 

The EXECUTION part, that’s the aligned action. LFG. You’ve heard me say it before, you either DO or you DON’T. Your choice. I prefer to be a doer. 

You either go workout or you don’t. You choose to eat well or you don’t. You choose to save and invest wisely, or you don’t. You choose to evolve with your partner or you don’t. 

The MANAGING YOUR EMOTIONS part, you either work with your emotions for your benefit or you let them control you. Sometimes the best thing to do, and this is what I’ve started doing, take the emotion out of it. Then reflect before making a decision.

The gym wasn’t open this morning, ok. Plan B, what can I do in this moment to make it more magic  to my benefit? 

— Go get in a short workout, chalk it up to an active recovery day. Give gratitude I have options & my health.

Say you invested, then you lost money, then you learned from said experience, made a different choice, doubled your money 💰 

Really y’all, everything comes down to mindset. Thoughts become things. Money is just energy. You control your energy and relationship with things & people. Love, money, & health are connected. 

I’ll leave you with a favorite quote for #mindsetmonday 

I keep this in my daily scheduler & as an alarm that goes off at 11:11 every day along with the reminder to live by my authentic values:

“Watch your thoughts, they become words; Watch your words, they become actions; Watch your actions, they become habits; Watch your habits, they become character; Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.” 

Oxox Coach K

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2 Quotes for Valentines Day

2 quotes for ya today, “How you love yourself is how you teach others to love you.” @rupikaur_  

“Love the world as your own self then you can truly care for all things.” – Lao Tz

#happyvalentinesday 💕

Choose the people that light you up, push you, and inspire you. Choose the people who see your light and will also hold you accountable to chase your potential. Choose the people who won’t not let you be your best self.

Choose those people and also be that someone to yourself. ❤️

I hope you find a reason to smile today. Even if it’s not from someone else but from yourself, loving yourself how you need to be loved. Don’t focus on what you don’t currently have & find joy in the things you do have. A little gratitude goes a long way.

Sending all the love! 

P.S. This instafamous photo was taken in the bathroom at the gym this mornin.😂 I had pink on. Thought it appropriate for the day. Just keepin it on the real reel 🤷‍♀️

Tank top on Amazon Favorites List!

https://www.amazon.com/shop/lil_bit_of_fit


P.S.S. The holiday of all the big beautiful bouquets, I wanna know what y’all‘s favorite flowers are???  [mine: pink roses🌹 daisies🌼, sunflowers🌻] 👇🏻💐 Drop’em below!

Oxox Coach K

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The Secret to Stop Playing Small

Let me see all the hands of the pros out there in the art of self sabotage like me!🙋🏼‍♀️

Introvert by nature, going after what I really wanted & the thought of being seen terrified me.

The fear of being wrong, judged, & accepted.

It transferred into me self sabotaging, resentment, playing small (literally & figuratively), & chasing a smaller version of myself the majority of my life. 

If there was a pro league — I would be a member. 🥇 

If you’re looking for clarity or understanding, the best thing I’ve found for me is to look at the  pillars of my life. 

I categorize these into: 

health

wealth

self

relationships

http://www.instagram.com/lil_bit_of_fit

I uncover the triggers, resentment, & blocks holding me back. Instead of making myself feel guilty I’ll use them as anchors for learning more about myself & how I choose to re write my story. 

These are the areas you can improve to bring more of that good juju & alignment back into your front door of life.

Yeah, sometimes they’re icky & gross & hurt like a you know what but they’re necessary.

Now — the resentment. Resentment is a sign YOU didn’t honor YOUR boundaries.

In the past before I was self aware of the personal shxt storm I created for myself, I blamed this resentment on the other person or party or situation. When in fact, I was really the fire starter.

Now, when I start to feel resentment & triggered more often by comments &/or behaviors of others — they are a product of me not speaking up for myself & allowing others to cross boundaries I should have set clearly.

These are all things I coach you through as a health coaching client. Wellness encompasses all – body, mind, spirit.

Join the family here:

https://forms.gle/tqjsEmeYPDRs4zYo6

Happy hump day y’all! 

❤️ oxox Coach K

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How to Manifest Abundance in 2021

Just me.

5 AM on a Sunday. No make up, no hair extensions, just takin an easy walk before work because it makes me feel good.

I’ve taken two rest days this weekend, much needed. This was also my weekend to work, perfect timing.

I’d be lying to say that I actually like to take rest days. I don’t. I thoroughly enjoy getting in a challenging work out.

Like I preach before sometimes you gotta do the things that you don’t wanna do because that’s what you really need not what you want.

Just wanted to share with you guys some changes & goals I’ve set for this new year. They’re commitments I’m keeping to myself.

For example, in the past, if I couldn’t go to the gym & get in a hard work out, I’d be pissed & just wouldn’t work out at all. Basically I’d pout.

I know walking makes me happy so now I commit to do just that — walk. Today I walked a mile, nice & easy, & watched Sex & the City reruns. It’s one of those shows I never get sick of — like Grey’s Anatomy & One Tree Hill.

Anyone else love those shows?

2021 Commitments to Myself:

— Live a life of minimalism. Purge all old & unnecessary things. I feel free the less material items I have. Keep only what I love. Anything that conjures up a negative memory or old energy I get rid of.

— If I buy something new, I get rid of something. Every single day I get rid of at least 1 item & put it in this huge basket that sits in my hallway. I call it the Giving Basket. (I named him Greg btw. I name all my favorite items & plants. I believe everything has energy, spirit, & presence.) I donate these items to others in need.

— I will not buy things on the clearance rack because I feel I’m not worthy of a more valuable item. This is me honoring my worth. If I really want something I will INVEST & believe it will bring positive energy & abundance into my life. Money is just energy. You have to learn to love it & have a beautiful relationship with it just like any other. It deserves respect, money is freedom. That means saving wisely as well.

— Unsubscribe from emails & unnecessary expenses that don’t bring value to my life. This means unsubscribing from toxicity in life too — Friends, habits, social media, etc. It’s just clutter.

— Save at least $100 every 2 weeks for an emergency fund. This go straight into my savings. Pay off all unnecessary debt ✅. Not utilize credit cards unless I can pay them off in full.

— Build my wealth, not just in a monetary context, but all the riches of life & love, & give freely. Make someone smile every single day. Give compliments. Tip well. Gratitude every morning & anytime I feel worry or a negative thought, replace & state something I’m grateful for.

— BE SOMEBODY WHO MAKES EVERYONE FEEL LIKE SOMEBODY

❤

️Hope these were helpful for you! Create your own! Also posted these on the gram, saved in Template Highlights 😉

Create your Own!!
Create your Own!!
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Self love is the best love

A while back, someone slid into my DM‘s & commented I had no boobs, no butt, & my eyebrows were too thick… ⁣

⁣

💁🏼‍♀️Apparently they drank the Hater-aid.

⁣

Years ago I would’ve been crushed. Most likely starved myself for weeks later because it was something I could control. Or tried to find the next work out that would change my body. Maybe different hair color. A bandaid. A drug. A high. ⁣

⁣

It happens to us all the time. What you have to realize is when people lash out at you like this, that is a reflection of how they view themselves.  It really has nothing to do with you. ⁣

⁣

Love them anyways. Wish them healing. ⁣

⁣

I posted these beautiful words on my Instagram stories almost a year ago:

⁣

“Every day, she falls in love -⁣

She falls in love just a little bit more.⁣

She falls in love just a little bit more, with who she is, and with who she isn’t.⁣

She falls in love just a little bit more, with her flaws, her fears, and her insecurities.⁣

With her smile, her her laugh, her voice, and her body.⁣

With her passions, her goals, her dreams and her future.⁣

Every day, she falls in love -⁣

She falls in love just a little bit more, with exactly who God created her to be -⁣

This unique, intelligent, independent, kind, caring, funny, creative, talented woman with a beautiful mind, a loving heart, and an incredibly deep soul.” @allthings_possible ⁣

⁣

What we really have is a happiness & lack of self-awareness problem. 

It’s not just because you’re overweight or underweight or struggling financially, relationally, or however this relates in your life. 

=> you dig. Go deep. ⁣

=> you spend time alone. You ache from lonely⁣.

=> you acknowledge. You heal. ⁣

=> you empower. Yourself & others. ⁣

=> you look in the mirror & see God. ⁣

⁣

I am grateful for this little body & life of mine. It is strong, resilient, & every wrinkle, scar, cellulite, stretch mark — is the mark of life I lived. 

That’s real Queen shit. 

⁣Don’t drink the Hater-aid.

Xoxo

⁣