There hasn’t been a day of my life where I haven’t needed to read a quote, poem, affirmation, or beautiful words from a talented creator to express how I feel, give me a hug, punch me in the gut, break my heart, or put it back together.
Ya know what I mean?
Swipe for a couple of my favorites today, & this is one of my favorite pics taken of me.
I told a friend goin thru a break up I understood that hopeless pit feeling. I said, “I hope you find love, but most importantly, I hope you love yourself more to be strong enough to walk away from what love isn’t & find peace in the realization that you are already love everyday.”
— I needed to take my own advice.
In my 20s/early 30s I made plenty of bad decisions after my 1st divorce at 27.
Plenty of fast & furious acquaintances, some more longer-term, they all aided in growth (some more enjoyable than others 😂)
Hxll, let’s be honest, some I don’t even remember. It’s like that person you put in your phone as “Joe Bumble” or “Dude from Texas” 😆📲
I talked about this in therapy. My therapist said it’s because when I was younger I didn’t believe I was worthy of love I desired.
Which is why I picked men that were not on my level, & to be frank, EASY for me. 🤦🏼♀️fxck me.
She said now I’m “selective & guarded”because I’m actually afraid I might find someone & be forced to choose between my happiness & freedom of autonomy & that person.
I’m afraid to make the same mistakes like being a people pleaser & losing myself. Losing the beautiful life I’ve created.
One of the major reasons I struggled with singleness when I was young was because I didn’t have a life that I truly enjoyed. Sure, I had stuff that I did because I had to (school, work, farm chores) & a few friends to hang out with, but there was so much down time where I was alone with my thoughts.
And in that down time, I wasn’t nurturing myself. I was still searching for someone to build a home in.
Unfortunately, with women, there is so much emphasis put on being “picked” that most of us focus the majority of our energy on that, controlling our bodies, & not enough on creating a bomb a$$ life for ourselves.
Ladies, stop being the hopeless romantic woman who tends to do the bare minimum when it comes to life because y’all are waitin for your prince charming to come sweep you off your feet.
Build your own life 1st, THEN find someone just as BombDiggity as you to build a life with. And that may be for a season, it may be for a lifetime. Define your relationships however you want.
I encourage all the single women & men reading this to begin to create a life that YOU live (while in your singleness). The right man or woman who comes along will just ADD to the enjoyment…but they won’t be the creator of it.
Oxox
Photo: @matteuccij13 @lensandlightphoto Can’t wait to do another one of these!