Health Coach | Speaker | Writer | Welcome to my digital diary! I'm here to help you blend life & fitness to find your health & happy! Thank you for being part of my family & allowing me to add value to your journey!
I wanna be with someone that would divorce me if I gained 50lbs.
Now hear me out…morning ponderings & real talk…
I’ve thought a lot about my journey of becoming my best self: past mistakes, my health, my fitness journey, my relationships, & every facet of 50 shades of f*cked up & beautiful on this ride.
For those of you new here I’ll be 42 years old this year & still don’t know what the f*ck I’m doing. It’s ok. I love every minute of this life! I’m grateful for all the sh*t I’ve been through because it’s made me the woman writing this today in this journal entry.
My opening statement isn’t about weight gain & aesthetic changes, it’s about being THE PERSON & with a partner who holds high standards for themselves too & one who makes me want to be a better woman, partner — human.
A reminder for myself & maybe you too 🤷♀️to be with people who make you want to be the best version of yourself. Maybe they make you feel a little uncomfortable. Good. Choose people who are different & help you grow.
I set these standards for all relationships — platonic, business, & romantic.
Why? Because it influences who you are.
I understand we’ve all been taught about these “fantasy” relationships & unconditional love …
… I believe love is conditional because people change & that’s totally OK. Lovingly allow the right people into your lives yet also realize it’s OK to lovingly release those who do not fit your nonnegotiable conditions.
👉 The game of relationships & choosing wisely @hormozi 👌🏻 🎙️
Journaled my feelings & thoughts this morning around energy, intentions, & alignment.
Big Dolly Parton energy ✨
I realize I’m constantly shedding skin into new versions of myself. Like peeling layers off an onion. I reflected back even 2 years ago & wow such a transformation inside & out!
I share this in hopes of being relatable to y’all wherever you are right now too. We’re all humans living this experience.
I reminded myself this morning I deserve people & companies & connections who are SURE. SURE in themselves and SURE about me. Because I SURE as heck is sure about me 🙂
This year, one of my big intentions is calling in aligned partnership & connections. I’m open to receive whatever is meant for me & my highest alignment without judgement or questioning.
Yeah, it’s painful & uncomfortable af for someone who loves control 👋 😂
Another change is the way I view time. I had to let go of my old “routines” & simply organize & schedule my daily activities & energy management to cycles that serve me best.
So I decided to stop looking at time like the norm & view it in cycles authentic to me. Maybe you can relate to this too?! ⏰
February is the month of love. I hope you manifest & receive whatever love (for yourself, others, & your life) is meant for you🙏💕
I was asked before if I had a “best friend.”
So I thought, well, I guess I don’t really use labels like that at 41 🤔
As I’ve aged it doesn’t “fit” in my life anymore.
I view people in terms of frequency & the qualities they bring out in me – you see, they’re all different.
I don’t judge people based upon race, sex, sexual preference, religion, politics, size, shape, whatever da fugg you wanna put here.
I ask myself:
Do you make me want to be a better person?
Do you bring me joy?
Are you kind & energy giving?
High vibe?
Do you embody a human & life I align with?
Yes?
Cool. We can hang out.
I have friends that hold keys to all different doors of my personality. I have close friends I’ve never even met in real life thanks to social media. I am incredibly grateful to have all of you in my life!
Some keys open my mind. Some my heart. Some my entrepreneur. Some my introvert or extrovert. Some my feminine side. Some my masculine. Some laughter. Some adventure.
Some Saint.
Some Sinner.
Some my rawest, deepest, ugliest, & most beautiful parts too.
Some I haven’t seen in decades or years, past lovers, acquaintances, friends, family, yet they’ve been a part of the most pivotal moments in my life.
They all take a piece of my heart that I plant in my garden of life. Some only grow & bloom for a season, or moment, or a lifetime.
It’s OK if a past friend, family member, spouse, or partner don’t hold all the keys to your billion dollar home or nourish every part of your field of life.
Some of the most beautiful weeds are the most beautiful flowers, some of the most magnificent creatures are the most unruly.
Throw away the labels, definitions, boxes, chains, & cages – let love grow wild. 🥀🌱🌹
Be fearless. Let your guard down. Always put your oxygen mask on first. Stand by your boundaries.
Love fiercely (especially yourself) because this all ends.
Learned a new word today as I was searching for an adjective to describe the emotion of abandoning yourself to change for another or some thing for this blog.
My biggest fears used to be failure & getting fat.
Getting ready for Rev Indy 2023!!
Now, at 40, my biggest fear👉abandoning myself.
I did when I was younger (along with struggling with obesity, bulimia, & Crohn’s disease) resulting in decades of pain (physically & mentally).
I’ve lost 55lbs & put my bulimia & Crohn’s disease in med-free remission via the Carnivore diet
Funny🤔 I wouldn’t change a thing because that mess, my storybook, has made the woman writing these words for you.
Words in hopes of by sharing my story & things I’ve learned that you can live your best life, one that nourishes your body, mind & soul.
Here’s your permission🎟️👉do things your way.
When you’re being yourself & living authentically, sink into how fucking good that feels while you sit back & watch everything fall into alignment🙏✨ 👐🧿🪬
Life is like beautifully constructed architecture. If designed well, it works! It stands with regal command.🫡🇺🇸🏁
🚫It’s not vanilla.
It’s like exquisite, intimate, passionate sex that’s better with the lights on🔥
She told me, “Once I lose the weight I know I’ll find the right guy & the right job because I’ll be happier & more confident.”
I felt her emotion in my soul, that was me at one time, too.
I thought as long as I shrunk myself to the smallest version possible I would, then & only then, finally be happy in the depths of my disordered eating & abusive relationship with myself.
Somehow I convinced myself by controlling my body, I held the power.
Guess what? Life kicked me in the face repeatedly.
However, despite the painful experiences of sickness, mental/physical heaviness of being obese, pain of living with Crohn’s, failed relationship & everything in between – I gained awareness.
I learned about communication, humility, compassion, empathy, self love, pride, proper nourishment, fitness, mindset, purpose, & the true meaning of wealth & happines.
I had one job I hated so much I wanted to cry every morning. I resigned after 2 months because I was miserable. I felt like the biggest failure & fell into a depression.
I didn’t know my purpose or what the f*ck I was supposed to be doing with my life. I didn’t know how to become the best version of myself.
I dove head first into researching & learning from resources & mentors such as The Secret, Abraham Hicks, Lacy Phillips @tobemagnetic , Bob Proctor, Wayne Dyer, Napoleon Hill, Dr. Joe Dispenza & more!
I learned about how I was wired, to embrace & accept myself thru researching my enneagram, astrology, human design, & Myers Briggs.
I learned that the statement, “I’ll be happier when”… – was total bullsh*t.
So if you take anything from this post, please read these slides in their entirety. I promise you they will change your life!
9 Devastatingly Painful Experiences That Transformed My Life
1. Realizing I forced control & that following my heart was all that mattered.
It’s challenging to wrap your mind around getting quiet & doing less, doing what you love, & releasing the need to control or make sense of things are the secrets to having & experiencing everything we want. The Universe/God/Angels/Guides/whatever you believe give us exactly what we ask for & vibrate at. It just may not be in the form or ways that we anticipated. I found I was rejecting many of my manifestations & desires because they did not come to me in the people, places, things, & forms I THOUGHT they would come packaged as. Painfully humbling realization to say the least. I let my head control my decisions from what other people & society told me was “right” & “true.” Which I found were full of falsities, filters, facades, ill ego & were draining.
2. Realizing society lies & simply doing me unlocked the doors to manifesting.
I committed to learning & accepting more about myself, other people, & this world. Sources that opened my eyes: The teachings of Bob Proctor, The Secret, Lacy Phillips, Wayne Dyer, Abraham Hicks, Mike Dooley & his books Infinite Possibilities & Manifesting Change, & The Magic of Manifesting Series by Ryuu Shinohara. I now simply focus on feeling, allowing, & receiving whatever it is that I want in whatever form the Universe gives to me & feels right in my heart. I release questioning the who, what, why, & how. I know I can have whatever I want simply because I decide it is so which also takes action & intention. Release societies beliefs & rules on constructs on timelines, shoulds, love, work, relationships, wealth, health, money, success, etc. Live in the NOW. Your answers lie there.
3. Battling obesity & disordered eating.
By the time I was in the 7th grade, I weighed 160lbs at barely 5ft. My disordered eating & poor relationship with food & self started at the age of 8. I hated my thighs, my tummy, flabby back, & love handles.
I missed out on a lot of memories, parties, & wonderful experiences because I was that person who was too attached to their eating disorder, body dysmorphia, & f*cked up routine. My mental & physical health suffered. My relationships suffered.
Losing weight, finding a diet & lifestyle (carnivore & lifting) that worked for me, getting fit & strong helped me get a healthier body & boosted my confidence. It’s the reason I have success habits & a routine today to be my best self.
4. Realizing I create my reality.
I discovered 2 secrets that changed my life instantly:
belief systems
abundance mindset Work on the 2, & you’ll be an invincible force.
I discovered that negative belief systems created a negative life. And that wasn’t acceptable anymore.
Until I recognized negative patterns & changed my self-talk, I was constantly settling & walking around as a watered-down, half-assed version of myself. If your inner chatter is negative, how can you do something amazing on the outside?
Same with an abundance mindset — there is enough for all of us to thrive & be successful.
5. Quitting my job.
It’s hands down one of the scariest & best decisions I’ve ever made. I had a job I hated every single day. It was in a cath lab. I had anxiety, my health was suffering because of stress & I was miserable. My relationship at the time suffered too. They both were extremely toxic environments I knew I had to gtf out of.
This season led to some of the most painful & wonderful discoveries of my life – moving, making my own schedule, CrossFit & nutrition coaching, learning to leap with faith.
I cannot even think of going back to one traditional 9–5 job now & having somebody else control my life.
My standard of living has improved. I’m happier, have more time, & earn more. I learn new sh*t every day.
6. Going thru divorces & dates.
I can’t even begin to describe the feelings of failure & shame as an overachiever & people pleaser enduring not one but TWO divorces & numerous failed relationships.
I didn’t even know how to date after my first divorce at 27 years old. But with each year & each shade of relationship, I discovered more & more about myself, other people, love languages, & communication. That relationships were here for reasons, maybe only a season, a more extended period of time &/or everything in between & that was ok.
I learned what worked well for me, what didn’t, how to communicate more efficiently, how to be happy alone & mold into the human I am today.
I now experience life & people with joy & curiosity. I live by The Four Agreements & don’t take anything personally. I learned to release people with a loving heart.
7. Forgiving my past.
It’s messy to come from a life of trauma & bullying. It leads to a part of you being affected deep in your subconscious.
Even today, it pops up from time to time, but I’m able to navigate thru it successfully. It turned me into a people pleaser, enabler, & over achiever which made me feel I always had to me more than what I was or something different.
Huge piece of advice…forgive everyone who’s hurt you directly or indirectly — family, friends, strangers. Hate is poison. I’m free of worry, blame, anger, resentment, shame.
Thinking of this gives me peace & makes me feel I have more control over my life & confidence I can shape however I want to. Every day is magic!
8. Writing vulnerably online.
I started my IG over 10+ years ago simply sharing my fitness journey. Today, I write online to share all my life lessons & secrets about anything that might benefit someone out there.
It changed my life forever. It gave me a voice, confidence, purpose, mediums to be of service, a side business that I’m proud of & so much more!
“Giving is the secret of abundance.” — Sivananda
It’s also something I enjoy doing immensely, so I’m grateful every day that I get the opportunity to serve. There’s not a single day I haven’t written about it in gratitude.
It’s also wonderful reflection & therapy for me too. So thank you for allowing me to add value to your lives!
9. Practicing the power of love.
So let’s talk about the power of negativity. You look at a friend having fun & you feel jealous. You think you’re not as good & focus on what you do not have. That’s a sad way to live, you know? Instead, what if you use the power of love everywhere — starting with yourself? Give yourself love via affirmations & become an energy of love to spread everywhere else.
How can you love someone else when your own cup is empty? This is why so many relationships are hollow. Time & physicality do not determine the success of a relationship. Intimacy, openness, acceptance, & being able to evolve beside one another, do. Love starts from you, & only then can it reach others.
“Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead.”- Oscar Wilde
I appreciate all y’all who take the time for me too to read & hold space❤️
Hailing from Fishers, Indiana, Katie is an aficionado of health, mindset, human connection, & entrepreneurship. Motivational writer, speaker, doer of many things, she grew up on her family’s beef cattle & crop farm where agriculture was her first love. She is a Purdue University graduate well known for her storytelling of life lessons & personal transformation through her own relationships, financial struggles, Crohn’s Disease, disordered eating, body transformation, & adapting to a carnivore diet lifestyle.
Katie also has over 17 years experience as a Registered Radiologic Technologist, Nutritionist, Brand Growth & Sales Consultant. She works with people of all walks of life as a nutritionist & life coach to help them authentically optimize their lives to find health, wealth, & happy!
You can catch her via Instagram @lil_bit_of_fit & blog, Lilbitoffit.com
The past couple years have felt really different, this year especially.
I told myself this year was my year. It was the year of “F*ck yeses only & no lateral moves because lateral moves don’t mean a level UP.”
My bff sent me a TikTok about cake vs icing. How we think icing is always the most important end goal & oftentimes we miss out on how good & more important the cake may be.
Both are important but it’s truly about dose & ratios & what’s appropriate for you at the moment.
It’s like wanting shredded abs (icing) but missing the more important goal of a healthy, happy, body you love (cake).
Or it can be like wanting partnership (cake) but truly wanting & deserving that partnership that sets your soul on fire (icing).
I wanted to remind y’all of something really important when it comes to any kind of relationship…& that can mean dating or partnerships, friendships, work-spouse relationship, parent-child, & that is this: I want to invite you to be the cake & to let everyone else in your life be the icing on the perfect cake that is you.
🤷♀️If you don’t like cake, that’s fine. Sub in pie🥧 💁🏼♀️Honestly, really, I’m more steak 🥩 than cake, but be the steak doesn’t have the same ring to it so here we go with be the cake 🍰
We often enter into relationships & make decisions from our codependent & people-pleasing habits with the desire for other people or bad habits to fill a gaping hole in our hearts & our lives.
You are the cake to end all cakes, everyone else is a delightful addition to your life, not the main attraction.
Commit to cakeful (or steakful) living. When you live in a space of freedom, self love, & empowerment, you allow yourself to be the icing for someone else.
Honor the people who are your icing 🧁 & the space where you are the cake 🍰 (or steak 🥩) 😉
Something my life journey has shown me is that the more I heal & love myself as I am, the more grounded & peaceful life becomes.
A hard lesson I learned 👉how & when to adjust. It’s hard because often times as painful af & you don’t wanna do it.
The older I get, the less I feel the need to perform.
the less I feel the need to shrink & settle.
the less I feel the need to chase.
the less I feel the need to overextend & over-explain.
The older I get the more I realize that I’m not interested in things or relationships that are not physically, mentally, emotionally nourishing, stimulating & rooted in authentic loving intentions.
MOOD: I’ve changed & evolved into a better version of myself. I’m choosing different & walking tall with fresh energy. I attract all that I desire to my highest alignment. Healing & self awareness are my superpowers. Growth is good to me. I love me, my body, my mind, & spirit. I now choose to stand in my power for good.
It was like getting glasses & actually seeing for the first time. Those “blobs” – they were trees. They were flowers & so much more. Most people spend the first half of their lives collecting and the second half choosing what to keep.
“So now that you’re 40, which lessons do you plan to carry with you?” A friend asked me this question on my 40th birthday. At the time, I didn’t have a great answer. Actually I think my eyes glazed over a lil bit from the enormous amount of information running through my brain. Looking back, I realized the reason I write to y’all is so you can learn from not only what I have learned, but from my mistakes & experiences so that you can be a better human faster than I was. THAT is being a good leader. It’s not about acting like you know everything or being “sugar & spice & everything nice.” “Nice,” in my opinion, is telling the truth & that doesn’t always make you the most popular, but it does make you someone who stands for something larger than themselves & accountable. I started my fitness, nutrition coaching, & social media journey 15+ years ago. During that time, I’ve written & shared thousands of blogs, posts, & videos, most rooted in life lessons learned & weeding out what matters from what doesn’t & what’s gonna help the most people out there. Here are more lessons the world — and the amazing people (like you) I’m lucky to have along with me for the ride — have taught me that I plan to carry with me as long as the Universe will have me here. It doesn’t matter what you do as long as you’re in motion. The less time you spend thinking and the more time you spend doing, the closer you’ll get to the life you want. Try some of these on for size and just run with’em. Report back to me when your life is awesome. I’m grateful for each & every one of you that read, share, & unpack your bags of life right beside me. oxox Coach K
I was staring at a terribly unflattering close-up of my face on my iPhone screen. Kinda like the terribly unflattering videos in the Target checkout line.
Staring at my iPhone, I was waiting for a client to accept our FaceTime call.
“Why the hell do reflections trigger us?” I thought.
I should have used those 10 seconds of wait time to express gratitude for this technology that allows us to connect from all over the world!
And yet all I could focus on was this red sun spot I have in the middle of my forehead & the fact my eyes looked tired af.
I moved the phone to a different angle to see if I could get a “better view.” I pulled at my eyes for an instant eye lift. I immediately started brainstorming solutions to these “imperfections.”
Was this something Botox could solve? Would I need to invest in some kind of fancy cream or treatment?
I’m disappointed to say that all of this flashed through my mind in those 10 seconds, but I keep things on the real reel here & I’m just like you.
“Only from a place of self love do you have permission to change yourself,” I kept telling myself. And that is what I remind myself every time the criticism Gremlin creeps in.
I understand it’s hard to break this cycle of self-critique. Especially when you’ve experienced trauma like being made fun of as a kid or raised in an environment where achieving & people pleasing were the only ways you felt you could receive love.
I realized years ago I needed to break these bad habits & started practicing daily gratitude & being present in my body as it was.
If you ask me today what my top beauty advice would be, I would say this…
Look in the mirror less, obsess less about things that don’t add true value to your life & look at the rest of the world to see what you could be using your time for instead.
I now use my extra time for growth & nourishment in the forms of education, service, money, personal development, health, self care, & making memories with loved ones.
I decided 2023 would be the year I give up. The year I nourish.
I owe it to myself, to you, to my dreams, & to the legacy I want to leave here that doesn’t have a damn thing to do with a red sunspot on my forehead.
I used to smash Bangs ⚡️ like it was my job. Coffees & energy drinks were temporary solutions. Which initially gives us some energy but after a while, we feel tired again. Let’s not forget the havoc it plays on our adrenals, inflammation, hormones, digestion, etc. 😔 Feelings of tiredness are so common that many times we just sit on the couch watching TV, unable to do anything else. It makes us feel like a watered down version of ourselves. We have everything. Modern man has everything: a computer, internet access, which gives him the opportunity to communicate with people around the world. A car to get to work faster, a gym membership, & plenty of food. We know everything. We all know that we need to watch less TV, eat less junk food, move more, & read more books. But we do nothing. Most will deny this. Try to remember the times when you bought brand-new sports equipment or a gym membership or vowed to start your diet on Monday. Did you? Why? Most often because of lack of energy, purpose, fulfillment, time management, & discipline 🤷♀️ So let’s promise ourselves positive change & continue to crush this week! Swipe, save & share: How I stopped being tired & started living by doing these 8 things brilliantly! Gimme an🦾 if you’re ready to make this your best life yet! oxox Coach K
Therapy confessions👉Things people ask me that make me laugh, want to drink🥃 & smoke a cigar😂(💁🏼♀️like I need a reason sip bourbon & smoke a cigar but whatever🙃)
Why are you single?
Are you getting married again?
Don’t you want kids?
Listen, I admittedly was a serial monogamist the majority of my life. I was the girl that always had a boyfriend.
I had only dated & kissed 2 guys up until the age of 27. Don’t worry, I made up for it quickly after my 1st divorce😆why lie. They call it the “Hoe Phase” for y’all not familiar👀
I don’t think I ever really learned how to “date.”
I honestly had no idea WHAT I was doing.
It’s like I just wanna hang with an awesome person, go adventuring & do cool sh*t with. One I love being around, that’s easy & down the road if it turns into something more, that’s the end goal🤷♀️
Had a follower ask what I thought she should do about dating & marriage…everyone laugh now😹
So we talked…
Don’t know if I’ll ever get married again, never say never. I know the people meant for me, find me. Hell I’m not even sure what the right answer is anymore nor do I care.
I feel relationships are whatever you choose to define them as, not what society tells you. I don’t feel you need a contract for happiness or validation.
By dating you do figure out what you don’t like so you know what you do like.
THINGS NOT TO DO:
Don’t say yes to men or women who aren’t suitable for you, don’t ignore red flags just because you don’t want to be single. Don’t do things you don’t agree with just to keep a relationship going. Don’t dishonor your own values just so you aren’t lonely. Don’t lose yourself. Don’t lose faith in love.
One day, you’ll understand the price is too high to pay to lose yourself — the most important person in your life.
All of your painful experiences craft you into the impeccable person you are today.
And the right person will appreciate every part of you, your story & let you live life on your own terms.
The right person feels like freedom & home imo. You can’t read a book to tell you how to feel…
You can read all the books in the world but if you can’t read yourself you can’t efficiently execute anything.
#shitmytherapistsaid
Has anyone else felt they read all the books but in honesty you realized you were a really sh*tty executor, too?😆👋
A painful truth brought up in therapy one time was the realization that when I felt anything or anyone was touching the walls of my freedom or made me feel “unsafe” or “wrong” — I’d run.
Confessions of a recovered avoidant🙋♀️
It was fear. I had a follower ask me today if I’ve ever been afraid of anything so much that I ran from it. Fxck me.🤦♀️ It forced me to painfully sit there & reflect.
I realized thru experiences & relationships what I should’ve been asking myself during periods of discomfort was, “Is this relationship or experience making me want to up level into a better woman?”
I stayed in a LOT of situation-ships & cohabitations far longer than I should have because of fear.
I also RAN from a lot of potential relationships because of fear. Fear to be in a situation-ships or comfortably numb cohabitation again.
I didn’t have the tools back then or self awareness to assess/navigate relationships & life experiences effectively.
If you feel you have to appear a certain way to receive validation, respect, or love — you need to figure out what it is inside you that makes you want to change to be more accepted & worthy.
Look for the pebbles in your shoes, they may not be large stones but they will cut you after time.
All right, hope my ramblings and therapy sessions helped you toO!
Love & hugs,
Coach “no longer in my hoe phase (thank the Lord 🙏😄)” K
