Uncomfortable Truths I Wished I Had Realized and Accepted Earlier In Life

Feeling pretty & PRETTY STRONG this mornin. Shamelessly admiring my arms in the freakin awesome lighting🦾 @hotworx.fishers

Your homework is to take time to simply love on yourself today, too. You’re magnificent!

Photo dump on IG of my morning success habits which includes me writing to y’all (& myself) every single day.

I had a great workout & sweat sesh while learning & listening to @iamsahararose & @itskrista talk about The Law of One. Well done sisters👏🏼 this was mind-blowing 🤯 & remarkably expansive!

Link here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/highest-self-podcast/id1244644906?i=1000542464069

Sparked what I felt nudged to channel & share with you guys:

Uncomfortable truths I wished I had realized & accepted earlier in life …

Here goes…

Happiness is the byproduct of living your purpose.
Happiness doesn’t make you happy, having purpose makes you happy. Once you become at peace with your purpose, your life & your body will fall in line. You won’t feel the need to numb & self sabotage with emotional eating, gluttony, self-loathing, overspending, sleeping around, excessive drinking – pick your poison.

Talking with clients & reflecting on my own journey, the reason we self sabotage is because we’re trying to find love & stimuli outside of ourselves & feel we have no purpose, no significance.

It’s like eating when you’re bored. It’s like the elderly & their partner dies or they’re put in a nursing home or you take their keys away, they often expire shortly after. It’s like taking away their purpose.

Gut check moment, right?!

Learn to redirect your mind & you then learn how to redirect your life. It’s your choice.

We all have definitions of heaven & hell.
We are all deliciously unique individuals. Just let people BE. Loving someone in the hopes that they will change is not truly loving someone. Truly loving someone is giving them the free will to live as they choose. This includes learning to lovingly release & let people go. Remember everything happens for you not to you. Stop trying to cram a round peg into a square hole.

Not everyone wants to be in the same kind of “relationships.”
The definition of a relationship will be different for us all. We’re all One. One Love. There is no right or wrong way to live your life, it’s all an experience of your choosing.

I personally feel there is no requirement to have to slap labels or legally binding contracts on relationships to make them more significant or lucrative.

What “successful” looks like, what “beautiful” looks like…if they make you happy & fulfill some part of you, let it BE & savor the moments. And if you choose at some time to be exclusive or to change your definition in a different way, let that BE & savor the moment or the season. Stop over complicating shxt.

Have a partner who wants to see you thrive & evolve WITH YOU or no partner at all.
Y’all, being around energy vampires who’re trying to keep you small is painful af – AND your decision. One of my best friends, as well as myself, have been in a relationship(s) where the other persons needs & goals were always way more important. You felt all that mattered was that you made it as easy as possible for THEM to move forward & be comfortable. If you achieved success, they were jealous, felt you were overshadowing, it was never as good as theirs, & your goals were ridiculous.

Even though we sometimes can’t choose whether we fall in love or not, we can indeed choose whether we stay with someone. There’s a big difference in being alone & lonely. I will repeat this to my very last breath.
If your partner constantly dulls your shine & all you feel is your energy waning & seeking to people please, it’s probably the wrong partner.

A rich relationship should be full of support, nourishing challenge, & encouragement. If someone doesn’t want to see you achieve your dreams, they won’t be there when you hit rock bottom either. Sorry Sis, no, quit bullshxttin yourself. And just because a relationship has lasted “a long time” doesn’t mean it’s working.

Life isn’t “fair” it just “is.”
If you expect life to be fair, you’ll be disappointed & never reach your potential. Shxt happens, & sometimes, there’s no reasonable explanation for why things happen or why people do what they do.

Ultimately I do believe we manifest our lives & attract what we get, we attract what we are. So think about that & control what you can control, which is your vibration & reaction to things.

There won’t ever be a better time to start.
Most people waste their lifetime procrastinating instead of living their desired life because they think there will be a “better time to start.” You never know how much time you have left, & life is certainly too short to postpone experiences that bring you joy. Making a wrong decision is better than making no decision. It’s like that saying I love SO much, “It’s better to ask for forgiveness than permission.” 😂

Money is simply energy & it has power.
No matter if you like it or not — money matters.
Learn to love it. Learn to appreciate it. It isn’t bad. It doesn’t make people bad. The vast majority of the global population spends 40+ hours per week working for money. Most people hate their jobs, but stay because they need to “pay the bills.”

Many of us spend a significant part of our lives working for money, I personally LOVE working, it brings me happiness & a feeling of purpose, but most people deny its importance or they let it define them.

Stop denying the power & importance of money & start learning how to use it to your advantage & give back. Make it work FOR you, stop wasting it on useless things, use things love people, invest only in things that bring you joy & upleveling.

Money isn’t everything, but it certainly brings you freedom, the ability to give back, & makes life a whole helluva lot easier & more fun.

Social media can steal your time, energy, & your soul but it doesn’t have to.
I have a love-hate relationship with Social media. The trolls make it unbearable some days, haters gonna hate, hurt people hurt people, etc. etc.

Your voice matters, don’t let other people stifle what you want to share with the world. Be proud of your life & your body. You can decide whether you use social media to make your life better or worse. You have control over what you consume & what you see.

Choose to be a creator, not a consumer of content. I loathe the word influencer, I choose to be an Authority. Sorta sweet, sorta Beth Dutton vibes. 🙅🏼‍♀️😉 Where my Yellowstone fans at?! 👋

Final thoughts…
Life ain’t always easy but it’s always good. It’s a privilege to wake up & be alive. Don’t expect life to be fair, create your own rules. Or do as I do, I don’t do rules I do what feels right.🙃

If you constantly choose comfort & ignorance over courage & awareness, you’ll end up being the puppet of others. If you, however, manage to embrace the following truths, you might be able to design an extraordinarily fulfilling, purpose-driven life earlier than I did.❤️❤️‍🩹❤️‍🔥

Oxox
Coach K

#beabetterhuman #manifestabundance#lifelessons #wordstoliveby #selfhealing #womeninhealthcare #xraytech#spreadpositivity #dating #relationshipgoals #singlelife #carnivorediet #carnivorewomen #catmom #plantmom #lilbitoffit #girlswholift #singlegirlproblems #singleguyproblems #indyblogger #indianablogger #midwestblogger #womenofindianapolis #womenofradiology #indianapolis #fishersindiana #carmelindiana #datinginyour30s #datinginyour40s

If you’ve ever been afraid to ask for help, maybe you need to read this

I’ve never been good at asking for help. Not in school, not from friends, not from the doctor, therapy, not from mom & dad, not from anyone really.

Always had that “figure this shxt out for yourself” mindset.

I know now this stemmed from fear of being judged – fear of being wrong, fear of being viewed as weak & stupid & not being able enough to take care of myself.

In my 1st marriage, I was not the breadwinner. I depended on him for numerous things. To put a roof over my head. More expensive items & investments. Paying for vacations & when we went out to eat.
And he provided, which I’m grateful. He’s a good man & I wish him the best to this day.

I didn’t have a lot of money. I was in debt. Still a hard worker but could just never get my head above water. I felt like a prisoner & hopeless & weak. I should’ve left years before I did for the both of us to thrive.

This fear of having to rely on someone else grew throughout my following relationships. I was the breadwinner for the majority of them. Fear of commitment & dependency turned me into the stereotypical emotionally & relationally avoidant.
You could imagine the pain of having to say I was a “dependent” when I married a US Marine.
Omg the sting.

😵‍💫

Growing up on a farm you’re raised to be strong, productive, resislient, & self-sufficient. There wasn’t always someone there to help you. You had to learn to figure things out for yourself.

Which I guess is why I do well in radiology, too. We have to think on our feet, outside of the box. We often times work alone, we have to move patients by ourselves, we have to learn to get images & diagnostic exams done for your doctors with as much precision as possible so we can help save peoples lives.

We are the eyes of your physicians. If we don’t do an exam correctly & efficiently, a diagnosis could be missed or misdiagnosed which changes the trajectory of your life. If we inject the wrong contrast or don’t follow proper protocol, we can kill you.

Talk about pressure right?! 

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 We’re not just monkey button pushers. 

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Xray school just exacerbated my issues with not asking for help. Stubborn. As. Hxll. I hated every moment of Xray school. You feel like you’re under constant scrutiny & criticism. It’s true, survival of the fittest & only the strongest survive 

😂

One of my favorite mentors, Dr. Stephen Cabral, sent an email yesterday about this very topic.
Him & his team helped me heal from SIBO & a bacterial overgrowth years ago. I learned much from them about proper functional nutrition.

This really hit home for me too…
You can apply it to any area of your life.

“If you encounter a forest & you know on the other side are your hopes & dreams, you’d want to get through the woods as fast as you can…

But most of us struggle, forever hacking through the bushes & branches, changing directions, getting lost, & wasting time…

While all along if we had just stopped before making the treacherous journey on our own & found a local guide that had traversed this forest thousands of times, that person could simply show us the paths they’ve cleared over the years.”

I don’t know if I needed to hear this, or someone else out there too, but it hit me like a ton of bricks.

I know I’m not the only one out there that has been conditioned to believe “figuring it out for yourself” is some badge of honor. Like I used to think not eating & beating the 

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 out of my body was too.

I’ve learned I NEED to ask for help & it’s ok. That’s what we’re here for to help support, learn, & grow together, united.

It doesn’t mean you’re weak, stupid, or incompetent. It means you’re smart because no one knows everything & you should never be the smartest one in the room or you’re in the wrong room.

This is the fastest & most guaranteed path to success. On every level: health, weight, relationships, career, finances, spirituality.

If I can ever help in anyway, I am honored to be your guide. This was way longer than I expected but obviously a message that needed to get out there.

Wish you all the best Monday & start to your week!

Oxox Coach K

Helpful links:

All info: https://linktr.ee/lil_bit_of_fit

IG: http://www.instagram.com/lil_bit_of_fit

How love, food, & money are all connected & how I changed

This morning I I realized how messed up my relationships were. 

I thought about chapters in the past, the struggles in particular. I talked about overcoming struggle yesterday. 

(If you haven’t, check that blog out. I needed to hear it myself too. A swift kick in the🍑)

Food, body image, money, & love are all connected. My 29 year old self & sure as sh*t my 19 year old self had NO IDEA.

It all comes down to energetics & the way you FEEL about yourself. 

I told y’all my body image issues, eating disorders, & fxckd up relationship with food & myself started at the age of 8.

I never felt pretty or significant. We had “enough” as a hardworking family of 5, growing up on a farm. 

But as a child, often material “wealth” outweighs the truly important things like kindness & service. 

So if you don’t have certain things or dress like the cool kids, you’re picked on & told that you’re poor & less worthy. 

If you’re not skinny like the popular kids you’re told you’re fat & not worthy of love. 

This wrecked my relationships with love, food, & money for decades. 

As a result I racked up credit card debt to buy things to make myself feel more worthy.

I over ate & under ate to control my body thinking reaching a certain size would make me worthy of love. Exacerbating my poor health, disordered eating, & gut issues.

My romantic relationships we’re like rainbows of confusion, struggle, & continuously feeling lost.

We place value & control on specific things for validation in hopes of making ourselves FEEL a certain way. 

Usually the feelings we’re chasing are to be loved, seen, heard, worthy, significant, & included.

We want to be CHOSEN & LOVED.

Over spending

Discounting & under valuing 

Emotional eating & Disordered eating

Over exercising

Giving our bodies to people who don’t deserve them

People pleasing & playing small

Excessive drinking & drug use

In American society we tend to value thin bodies, financial wealth, titles, material wealth, “fitting in & following suit.”

Improvement in all of these areas of my life started with changing my mindset, my energetics around my worth, reminding myself money is just energy, thoughts became things & I controlled my reality by my reaction, reminding myself there is so much abundance in this world, I matter simply because I exist & because I have a kind heart & choose a life of service & purpose.

I felt some of you out there may have needed to hear this message this morning & know that you’re not alone.

I may be known as a “nutrition coach” & “Xray tech”, but a reminder there are so many more facets to you than labels, food, money, & body image. 

And my doors are open if you need a listening ear who accepts you as perfectly imperfect as you are.

And what you are is incredible simply because you’re YOU.💕

Happy Monday loves!

Oxox Coach K

Reflections on my 39th trip around the sun

Ya know I love vacations but I LOVE going home, more. Anyone else like this too?

Back to routine. My home. My gyms. My Pete 🐈‍⬛. My bed. My people I love. 

Gettin ready to head back to Indy tomorrow. 

As I did laundry & packed, I let my mind wander. This vacation felt like a huge reflection & reset for me. New beginnings. 

A few: 

  • Starting a new job PRN at the VA hospital in Indianapolis soon. PUMPED!
  • New workout routines & body goals, it’s gainz season y’all 🦾🦿
  • Purging stagnant & less optimal habits & replacing them with better ones
  • Purging things I don’t need
  • Simplifying & optimizing business & life
  • Being ok letting old friend circles go
  • Pushing myself to do new things, date, & meet new people

I am actually REALLY excited to enter my 40’s. Something about moving into a new decade makes me feel optimistic & all warm & fuzzy like a deep conversation over an old fashioned or a cup of coffee.

Life really hasn’t turned out as I “expected”

I feel it has turned out better & exactly how it was supposed to.

Kinda like this jumper here. This 5’1, shorty was skeptical about buying it. It was not what I expected – but BETTER. Well done Amazon, well 👏🏼 done 👏🏼 XS fit purrrrfect 😻😆

My younger self thought at 40 I’d have it all figured out, be happily married for decades, picket fence, 2 kids, #merica ….y’all can laugh now.

After 2 divorces I feel like the universe is telling me I make a really good ex-wife 😂 And ya know what? I am. I’m a great ex wife. I love all my exes. I have zero baggage & no hard feelings. I choose to remember the lessons & all the wonderful memories from my relationships.

That thinkin at 40 I’d “have it all figured out thang”…hxll I can’t even fxckin remember where I park my car in the mornings or what day it is half the time.😝 

Spiritually I still feel like I’m in my 20s, most days I physically feel BETTER than I did in my 20s. 

I say I have a young spirit & a significantly old soul. Dangerous combo.

I look young but inside I’m a baby grandma. Totally ok with it. Some days I can party with the best of them but most days I’m an introvert, don’t ask me to do anything after 8 PM.

It’s like I don’t really know what to do with me? So finally I just said fugg it, I don’t do rules I do what feels right. Especially dating or dressing myself. 

I’m at that weird age I really don’t know what’s appropriate, like how to “dress for my age” or “date in my age range”  

WTF does that even mean anymore?! 🤔🤷‍♀️

Someone, if you have the answer please clarify this for me 🙋‍♀️

I surrendered y’all. I surrendered to the fact that I will continue to get older each year & I don’t have to have expectations at all. Simply just a direction to always be working on bettering myself.

I vow, this year, to settle in & let my 39th year wrap itself around me like a warm & fuzzy Sherpa jacket.

I remind myself that faking happiness & perfection are the quickest way to die on the inside. I remind myself life is what it is & it IS what I make it. Do shxt that makes me happy & brings Joy. Be kind. 

Moral of this page from the life of Lilbitoffit:

I’m a 39 yo old woman. I’m flawed & weird af. I don’t love everyone & everything, & there’s plenty of people who do not love me & I could care less. 

I am getting wrinkles, sunspots, & I sure as hxll can’t recover from drinking like I used to & way over consume caffeine, but I refuse to give up coffee & making memories with friends & family.

I am still working on loving myself & living a life that makes me proud, fulfilled, & content. And I’m cool with having no idea what I’m doing or where I’m going. It’s never boring 😉 

Thank y’all for listening to this “middle-aged”rambling. 

Cheers to officially being a “cougar” next year 🐆😸 

Oxox 

Coach K

Lilbitoffit’s Live Your Best Life List!

@lil_bit_of_fit ‘s Live Your Best Life List

This mug is epic is it not?!

GRATITUDE:
think & name off at least 3 things you’re grateful for & do at least one thing that brings you joy in the mornin. Smile more. Compliment more. Do at least one nice thing for someone every day.

MOVEMENT:
get a walk or some kind of movement done 1st thing in the morning. Be intentional about getting your 10K steps in.

FOOD:
eat nourishing food that does not cause any negative physical or mental triggers. Eat slow & mindfully. Hit your protein grams daily. At least 30-50g/meal. Average 2-3 meals/d, no snacking. Let your carbs & fat grams fall where they will. Eat at your maintenance calories the majority of the year. Drink at least 1/2 your body weight in oz of water daily + get in adequate electrolytes. Walk after meals, even 10 minutes. Eat your largest meal & carbs after your workout & taper meal sizes off later in the day.

WORKOUTS:
strength train 3-4 x/week. Use cardio wisely, get in your daily steps.

SELF CARE:
do sh*t you love everyday & fill your cup. Sleep 7-8 hrs/night. Take 2 rest days/wk. Sweat, get some sunshine & nature as much as you can.

MINDSET:
make a vision board or list or “Alignment” board on Pinterest & fill it with visions, quotes, pictures, & expanders of the life, love, body, & person you desire to embody. Believe you are worthy & deserving. Listen to positive podcasts, read books, surround yourself with extraordinary people & a nurturing environment.

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That’s it. Don’t make it harder than it is.
Remember motivation is fleeting, but you have the choice to be a person who keeps commitments to themselves.

Now that know better…

Do better.

You DO have it all together, you just periodically forgot where you put it!

😉

Oxox
Coach K

Ps. 

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 Mug is from Kroger!!
How cute is this???

Tap for Google Drive PDF Link, also available in link in Instagram Bio

Pss. I posted downloadable link to this list on Instagram in “Mindset” highlights, also available in the link in my Instagram bio!

Love and hugs!

oxox Coach K

Tips to help you with sugar cravings & fat loss! Especially on the carnivore diet!

Q: I can’t seem to control my weight, portions, & sugar cravings no matter what diet, currently Carnivore.⁣ Some days I’m not hungry.

So I asked her, “What’s your 1st thought in the morning when you wake up? Is it how much you’re scared you weigh?”⁣

She said yes. I said that’s your problem.⁣

Also asked her, “Do you intentionally make sure you are simply moving & hitting your steps every day?”

She said no. I also said there’s your problem.

One thing you can easily control which will also boost your mood, metabolism, digestion, & appetite👉🏻Build a success routine which includes movement. I suggest 1st thing in the morning. That leaves less time for excuses for you not to get your workouts in. I got mine this mornin before work.

When you’re constantly stuck in a negative mindset around dictating your entire day on a number or what you look like in the mirror, that’s the weight actually weighing you down.⁣

You dictate your reaction. Your thoughts & emotions (your REACTION to things) – dictates your behaviors. Your behaviors become your habits. Your habits become you.⁣

Tips we talked about to help navigate sweets cravings, addiction, & mindset around body image:⁣

– Stop body checking in the mirror. Take away the scale. Wear comfy clothes that complement your body. You wear your clothes, your clothes don’t wear you.⁣

– Sweets cravings are addiction: determine if you’re an abstainer or moderator. If you’re an abstainer you need to avoid carbs & sugar, period. Get the food out of your house. Watch artificial sweeteners, keto treats, cheat days, gum, drinks with sweetener, make sure you’re eating enough food especially enough fat.⁣ Track if you don’t know!

– Cheese, dairy, nuts, & nut butters can be addictions/triggers, they’re hard to portion control.⁣

– Choose meats easier to portion control like ground meat vs ribeyes, ribs, pork belly, bacon. They are highly palatable (& high fat) which means you’re more likely to eat past satiety.⁣

– You may need a multivitamin to fill in gaps for your specific needs. Always consult with your physician before making any changes. Most common imbalances/deficiencies I see with Carnivore if not eating a well rounded variety: vitamin D, electrolytes, magnesium & sodium, B vitamins, zinc, vit A, calcium & vitamin C⁣

– Check yo stress: Relationship & life stress? Sh*tty sleep? Over training? Under eating? Too much protein? Not enough Fat? Still eating trigger foods?⁣ Over caffeinating? ALL STRESS which increases your blood sugar, & increases inflammation even if you’re eating low-carb.

Your reflection in the mirror does not dictate your worth. Neither does what diet you choose to follow. Choose the things that make you a better human!

oxox Coach K

Tips to optimize eating for your workouts and getting results!

No matter what diet you follow, you should know that nutrition has a significant impact in every facet of your life, it is literally what you are made of. It especially has significant impact on your results in the gym. What you eat before, during, & after your workouts may be the difference between achieving your goals & falling short.

#meatbars for the win!

I want to keep this as basic af, easy to understand & apply as possible for y’all, no matter if you follow a meat-based (or “carnivore”) diet or a more traditional approach including carbs. I will share my experiences & tips especially for those of you who have struggled with special digestive needs like autoimmune, IBS, IBD, & Crohn’s like myself. A lot of word vomit here, I tried to include as much as I could.

Remember, there is no one-size-fits-all approach when it comes to the “right” way to eat, workout, or live. You choose what works best for you. 🙂 This is a non-dogmatic safe space.

In general, by eating a healthy, well-considered meal 1-2 hours before exercise, & another healthy, well-considered meal within 1-2 hours after exercise, most people can meet their workout nutrition needs without anything fancy stuff. In other words:

If you’re a healthy person who exercises regularly, you probably don’t need special workout nutrition strategies. Most of us fall into this category & that’s where I will keep this focused.

Important stuff:

TOTAL DAILY INTAKE

Your calories & energy balance. The big rocks. Without adequate calories, you won’t perform or feel your best. Fats & carbs are your energy sources, not proteins.

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MACRONUTRIENTS

Carbs (if you eat them) the more you train or the harder you train – the more carbs you will likely tolerate. Fats are the other lever for us fat fueled folk. Protein stays pretty consistent.

ELECTROLYTES & HYDRATION

Ever been dehydrated or electrolytes lacking? If you have, then you know your energy, sleep, recovery, & training were trash 🚯. These are crucial for keeping your CNS healthy, muscles hydrated, & your body functioning optimally.

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FOOD COMPOSITION

You are what you digest & absorb. You also are your habits. Eat food that is nourishing to your body & mind. Avoid foods that are hard to digest, cause physical problems, & emotional issues like binging & emotional eating. If you don’t absorb nutrients, you won’t utilize those nutrients efficiently.

MEAL TIMING

Efficient digestion, absorption, & nutrient utilization are keys here. Meal timing won’t change things drastically until you master the basics first. Like sleep, eating enough food & the right food for you!

Swipey swipe away!

Tap photo for IG post!

Special timing considerations:

  • You work out early af in the morning: you can do these fasted if you prefer & eat a well sized meal with plenty of protein after. If you’re hungry in the am, liquids (shakes) & easy to digest, low volume carbs (like cereal or rice cakes), if you eat carbs, are more appropriate. I find people who follow a meat-based diet & workout early in the mornings prefer to fast & then eat their largest meal post workout.

CARBOHYDRATES

There are few things in the fitness world more controversial than carbs. Will they make you fat? Do you need them? Timing? The questions are endless. Quality fuel is critical, which we get from carbs & fats. They are our energy sources, not protein. You pick which one you prefer.

Carbs in general are your body’s preferred fuel source when it comes to highly glycolytic (means it burns a sh*t ton of carbs) activities like HIIT, the “crossfits,” & Orange Theory-esque type workouts.

Optimal timing & portions are more important. You want every gram of carb you consume to be utilized as an immediate fuel source or to restore glycogen levels – you don’t want it to be stored as fat. I find them consumed around your workouts most optimal. Just remember the more active one is, the more carbs they can typically warrant consuming.

PROTEIN

Protein is essential for tissue growth & repair. Since the body is continuously breaking down proteins, our diet must provide sufficient quantities. Although recommended intakes vary & depend on so many different things like dieting/health history, activity, training modality, goals, digestion, allergies, etc, a post workout shake is almost always universally helpful to kickstart muscle repair, recovery, & growth.

Shakes are convenient around workouts for high digestibility & absorption, but not necessary if you time your meals accordingly to your needs & preferences. I prefer real, whole foods for my nutrition vs supplements. To cover your bases most people do well consuming meals around 30-50g of protein per meal to meet optimal amino acid needs. Timing will differ based upon diet preference, workout timing, workout modality, & specific goals.

FAT

The body uses fat as a fuel source, & fat is the major storage form of energy in the body. Fat also has many other important functions in the body, & is needed in the diet for optimal health. Fats (cholesterol) are also the precursors to our hormones.

Fats in food come in several forms, including saturated, monounsaturated, & polyunsaturated. Quantity & quality are important. Fats do help to slow digestion, which maintains stable blood glucose & insulin levels. Fats also provide vitamins & minerals, aid in absorption & are important in everyone’s diet.

Some examples of foods that contain fats are butter, oils, nuts & seeds, meat, fish, & dairy products. Again, people will have different preferences as to whether they get their energy from carbs or fats. Most meat-based people prefer fats as fuel or they only consume a strategic amount of carbs around workouts only.

SPECIAL CONSIDERATION TIPS

Athletes may have special needs, for example:

  • An endurance athlete: You train for high level competition. You log a lot of high intensity miles each week. For you, carbohydrate & calorie needs are likely higher unless you do not digest them well & prefer fat as fuel. You could add a protein + carbohydrate drink or shake during your long training.
  • A bodybuilder: You lift weights with muscle growth as your goal. Your protein & calorie needs are likely higher especially in a building phase.
  • Getting ready for a fitness competition: You likely accumulate more exercise hours. Goal is to drop to a low body fat %. For you, carb intake (if you eat carbs) will likely be lower & protein higher especially as calories drop to maintain as much lean muscle mass as possible. Keto athletes will manipulate protein & fat macros to their preferences & needs.

Tips for those with special digestive needs like allergies, autoimmune, IBS, IBD, & meat based:

**This is simply to help you optimize from my experience as an athlete & someone who lives with Crohn’s & special needs**

  • If you’re going to eat carbs, keep them around your workouts for more optimal utilization aesthetically & metabolically. Largest meals I prefer post workout & earlier in the day. Digestion is better in the mornings.
  • I did best with minimal digestive issues with easy to digest, gluten free, low volume carbs like rice cakes, gf oats, white rice, rice chex cereal if I was going to eat carbs. I don’t need them much anymore since going meat-based. Ground meat & seafood is easier to digest vs steak, ribs, & chewy cuts of meat.
  • If you workout early af in the am & you’re not training for a performance sport, I find fasted workouts more optimal as far as aesthetics & digestion. Protein shakes are great if you’re hungry early, training long periods, or don’t have time to eat a meal within an hour or so after your workout. Stop fasting until like noon before you eat after an early workout. “Tone” aka MUSCLE takes FOOD. You gotta build the body first!
  • People reverse dieting do better with 3 meals/day vs 1-2, especially if meat-based. It’s harder on your digestive system to cram more calories in larger, less frequent meals. You MUST set yourself up for a successful cut by eating at maintenance or surplus for an extended period of time (like 6 months to a year realistically) BEFORE dieting for optimal, quicker results. A HEALTHY body loses body fat. You shouldn’t be dieting more than 1-2x/yr for no longer than 12-16wks. Most maintenance levels for active females are around 1800-2100+ calories/d. (I eat 2000/d & am 5’1, 105lbs for ex)
  • When dieting, I find larger, less frequent meals more satiating utilizing intermittent fasting. Fat cycling leaner, lower fat days with higher fat days is extremely effective & easier to sustain on a diet. Try 4 lean days/wk & adjust as you go for your needs. Higher fat days you should be consuming around maintenance calories. Leaner individuals don’t need as many lean days or need to do the Protein Sparing Modified Fasting (PSMF)
  • Don’t eat a high fat, heavy meal too close to working out. Digestion takes a lot of energy & you will be tired & sluggish. Eat 2+ hrs prior.
  • Stay hydrated! 1/2 your body weight in oz, more if you sweat a lot & workout frequently. I use Ultima Replenisher electrolytes. If you’re low carb, you require more electrolytes. If you’re having muscle cramps & sh*tty recovery, up your electrolytes. All my product/supp info/discount codes in LINK IN IG BIO!
  • If you’re having trouble sleeping, peeing a lot, hungry all the time, & tired, check your macros. You may need to decrease protein & up your fat. This is why I suggest at least loosely tracking your food! I find 180-200g of protein on the top end for females. 140g protein is an avg for most active females lifting weights. Most people who are hungry all time need more fat & calories.
  • Maintenance macros: start with a 1:1 ratio of protein:fat as a baseline then tweak as needed. Use the TDEEcalculator.net to find your calorie needs 1st.
  • If you’re losing hair, tired all the time, gut messed up, hormones wonky, craving carbs/salt, waking up at night starving, sh*tty sleep & recovery, plateaus in the gym or fat loss – you’re most likely NOT EATING ENOUGH, not sleeping enough, fasting too much, over caffeinating, & stressed to the titties -STOP 🙂

oxox Coach K

The only 2 things you need to do to get the body, life, and love you desire

Going to take a different spin to answering y’alls questions today and I feel no matter what you are wanting to change or bring into your life this is how you’ll get it.

This really has nothing to do with a specific diet, macros, or workouts, BUT everything in your life stems from healing & cultivating a better relationship with just 2 things: knowing your worth & you’re enough & putting action behind it.

Full Youtube video here, click image

https://youtu.be/6vAczkI3cp8

You see you can go to the best doctors or hire all the best practitioners & coaches in the world but if you don’t believe in yourself, that you are worthy of whatever you’re seeking or wanting to heal, you’ll never get it.

We go to coaches & doctors for the “answers,” often seeking more numbing mechanisms to cover up the underlying issue which is us not believing in ourselves. We numb with excess food, shopping, alcohol, giving our bodies to people who don’t deserve them, etc. 
So I can sit here & give you all the specific diets, macros, & workouts, but they don’t fxcking matter if you don’t believe in yourself & that you’re worthy of these things. That means being able to apply the information as well, & if you’re paralyzed by your beliefs, the application won’t happen either.

For example, chasing beauty, love & success, even if you attain these things, they won’t bring you happiness & love unless you love yourself. Look at Marilyn Monroe, Amy Winehouse, Whitney Houston, Robin Williams, Heath ledger… just had this conversation with one of my best friends the other day while watching A Knight’s Tale with Heath Ledger. These people were so immensely talented & yet they took their own lives because they didn’t love themselves.

Ladies, some of the most beautiful models in the world, the most successful people in the world get left in relationships, are lonely, & are not happy because they don’t love themselves. Beauty truly is in the eye of the beholder and the beholder is you.

When traumatic experiences happen to you, like maybe you were left as a child, or someone left you in a relationship, if you start to believe you’re not enough, & these things pile up on top of you, & you don’t learn to unpack your bag — they will suffocate you & take over your life.

“Bad” shxt happens, but if you seek changing your personality, or chasing a body aesthetic to attain “happiness” you will forever be unfulfilled, you’re not really treating & healing the underlying issue which is you believe you’re not enough. 
I did this, I did this for decades & chased a smaller body thinking it would make me happier — it did not. It may temporarily give you that “high” but you won’t stay there. You won’t stay there until you become the person you want to be & cultivate those success habits & commitments to stay the person you desire to be.

So take all these talented amazing people like the actors, actresses, models – all these successful people we think have everything, but do they? It’s easy to hide behind & be fooled by filters, editors, & facades.

Take us as young girls or boys, we often times chase after boys & girls, we try to change ourselves, we try to please our parents, please teachers, please other people & where does it get us?

Love & worth are not to be chased, earned, or worked for – just like food, they are essential for life.

Watch your world change when you start to love yourself. It’s like the “Beauty is not the rent we pay to exist in this world.” We matter just because we exist. I have this on a post it on my mirror.

As children what happens is we have unmet needs. We want to be loved, we want to be safe, we want to be viewed as successful & significant & we encounter disappointment in these areas. We begin to believe that our needs will never be met & we are not enough which transcends into our adult lives.

There is no one thing in this world that can meet your unmet needs other than yourself.

To feel beautiful & loved you don’t need to change your shape or get surgery or whatever you seek to change your appearance, the one thing you need to do is believe you are loved & lovable because that is what you will attract in your life. 
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to better yourself or change something as long as it comes from a place of self loving & not self loathing. Your foundation has to be set on true self love.

People love you & see your significance & appreciate you to the degree that you love & see your significance for yourself.

Think about it, when people say good things about you like, “You’re beautiful, my goodness you are so talented, I just love to hear your voice, etc” — all these good things are warm like a fabulous cup of coffee or that cocktail you love you that warms you from the insides. Exude that energy & other people will see it & you’ll notice better things will come into your life when you vibrate at this high energy. You can choose this feeling right now. Don’t give other people or things that power with which you hold within yourself.

Because when these things leave you, we tend to feel poorly about ourselves. Remember we attract everything that is aligned to our energy. What is meant for you will never miss you & if it’s meant to leave let it go. Release it with a loving heart.

When you learn the art of unattachment, that’s when you start a lifelong romance with your life. One that is fulfilling. One that will give you the body that you want, the feelings that you want, the experiences that you want, & the people that you want, and it all starts with you.- Not a diet, not another person, not the right workouts, or meal plan, or macros.

So how do we do it? You have to learn to nourish your soul like you nourish your body. You have to nourish your mind. Tell yourself what you want to feel & what you want to hear & paint a different picture. Tell yourself you are beautiful & you have a fabulous life & ove being in the sunshine & you have people who love you simply because you are you. Paint that picture & believe it.

Create vision boards. I love Pinterest & save quotes that make me feel alive, loved, understood. I save pictures of the healthy body I want & how I feel. I save pictures of relationships goals & the person I want to be & I want my partner to be. Embody the habits of that person you want to embody & put them in place to get what you want. You have to put action behind the desires, too.

Set your clothes out in the morning to make it easy for yourself to go work out. TImeblock walks in your schedule. Meal prep your food ahead of time so you have good things to eat. Book self care & time to yourself. Unapologetically own your fxcking life & quit letting other people influence your life & live it for you. Don’t let them influence you by putting down a specific diet or things that you love, or telling you you’re weird & you need to change. That’s giving other people power.

The longest relationship you’ll have in your entire life is with you. Kids grow up. Partners leave or they die. Your parents pass. Friends will come and go. But you always will be with yourself until your very last breath.

Believe you are worth it.Because you are. Remember if beauty made you happy every beautiful person would be happy. A bodybuilder knows you have to break down muscle & build it back up & let it recover over & over again to get the body they want — a wounded, broken heart is just the same.


oxox Coach K

Some blunt truths about your weight gain & why you struggle with food & fitness

I wanna know if any of these resonated with you like they did with me. 

You’re not alone, I’ve done every single one of these things. 

The difference, if you’re still stuck stuck here – I acknowledged my shortcomings & made a decision to rewrite my story. You can too. 

I think the biggest one that struck me hard was:

“If you gained weight doing things to regain your health, you needed to gain that weight.”

We base our worth so often solely on our looks & how skinny we can get.

Because of the society we live in, I understand it’s still hard to acknowledge these things & speak openly.

We feel shame around them, especially gaining weight. 

I’m here to tell you you’re not alone & everyday you can choose to own your excuses & make a decision to change. 

Effort matters, perfection is not needed.

Remember we were made to be ACTIVE, JOUFUL participants in life.

Love & Hugs 

Oxox

Coach K 

Post with full graphics on Instagram

If you gained weight doing things to regain your health, you needed to gain that weight.

I’m talking about that reverse dieting, more rest, stopping the excessive working out, stopping the constant restriction & scarcity mentality, eating more fat, for some it may mean eating more carbs, maybe it means you stopped isolating yourself & started living again, etc. You can’t live a full life on a chronically empty tank (mentally, physically, emotionally, & spiritually).

You keep diet & program hopping – basically just “winging” &/or over complicating sh*t.

You don’t stay consistent with anything. You think you always have to do what someone else is doing. You allow yourself to get lost in all the info & lose sense of what YOU really need/like to do. You choose unrealistic goals, quick fixes & extremes. You choose a plan yet never prepare or follow through which leads you to continual self sabotage & poor choices. You refuse to track food & activity, therefore, really have no idea what you’re consuming. What gets tracked gets managed. You don’t need to overcomplicate things like meal prep, simple movement, & the basics. Keep it simple & routine: get 10k steps a day, eat nourishing real food, sleep, manage a positive environment & mindset.

You haven’t dealt with your relationship with food, exercise, & body image.

This a biggie y’all. You have to “diet” & LIVE from the inside out. Your relationship with self/food/exercise, your mindset, the energy you put off – ARE EVERYTHING. Thoughts become things & you attract the energy you put out. It doesn’t matter what diet, macros, training program, coach/trainer/practitioner you hire, they won’t work unless you do. The most important work is the inner work. “You must be willing to do the things today others won’t do, in order to have the things tomorrow others won’t have.” Les Brown

You’ve set unrealistic, unsustainable goals you can’t adhere to.

Are you comparing & constantly trying to look like some else who’s life, background, history, health, preferences, etc are NOTHING like yours? Cliché but true – comparison is the thief of joy and we were meant to live this life with JOY. If you have a poor relationship with carbs & they cause negative mental & physical effects, why are you eating them? If you hate meat, why are you trying keto & carnivore? If you hate weightlifting, why are you trying to look like a bodybuilder? If you hate veggies, why are you vegan? If your life is stressed to the titties, why are you trying to diet?

You haven’t taken enough time to heal, educate yourself on how your body works, or gain self awareness for a successful diet.

I used to be a chronic dieter & eating the wrong foods for my specific needs. My body composition reflected that too. I was skinny fat, inflamed, binge eating, performance & recovery sucked – life basically sucked. Learning about your body & how it works & WHY you need to eat & train a certain way will change your life. You should be eating in maintenance the majority of the year, not diet more than 1-2x/yr no longer than 12-16 wks. Most active females, athletes, & avid exercisers should be consuming around 1800-2100+ calories/d for maintenance. You have to BUILD the body first to reveal the physique you want when you lose the body fat. That takes food, rest, & strength training.

You refuse to give up your weekend warrior ways & get real with food consumption & activity.

Just because you didn’t log your food doesn’t mean you didn’t just down a whole pizza, bag of chips, 6 cocktails, or whatever your poison. Same with your steps & workouts, if you didn’t get it in, that falls on you – no one else. Restricting all week & blowing it every weekend is also biting y’all in the tush. Hit your protein & eat enough calories for your health & goals consistently. Get a fitness tracker & track your steps. They are the biggest impact on calories burned throughout the day. If you have gut issues or special dietary needs, own that too. Stop going out & allowing other people or situations to control what you put in your body. You can totally enjoy being social, you simply need to set & stick with healthy boundaries you set for yourself.

You’ve struggled with disordered eating & can’t “feel” true hunger/satiety cues. Not everyone can intuitively eat if you’ve lost you’re intuition.

This one – HUGE. HUGE reason I cringe when I hear people say “Just eat intuitively” or “Just eat as much meat as you want on Carnivore.” Quantity matters. You should be able to distinguish between true physical hunger & emotional hunger/habits. Some of us have lost this ability because of chronic dieting. Your meals should be large enough to keep you full for 3-4+ hrs, & they should be protein centric. You should not be snacking in between meals. Most of us should be eating 30-50g of Protein/meal. We numb emotions with food, we eat too fast, we eat our kids food, we eat in front of the tv, we wire our brains to think these sabotaging habits are normal. You can choose to change those habits & re-write your story.

You’re ignoring your toxic environment.

What you consume, consumes you and what consumes you, controls your life. Our consumption is not only what we eat & drink but also what we watch, listen to, media we consume & environment. If you want to change, become a better version of yourself, become healthier or more successful, you have to change your behaviors & consumptions. Listen to a podcast, motivational speakers, surround yourself with successful, positive minded people – create yourself a new environment. That might mean to break up friendships or a relationship. For me it means constantly learning/changing in order to become a better version of myself.

You’re simply not disciplined enough. It is what it is – you either do or you don’t.

Like Andy Frisella says, ‘Don’t listen to your b*tch voice.” There’s nothing worse than rolling through life in the passenger’s seat. You wake up, go to work, & drift through each day with no direction or driving force. It’s about keeping commitments to yourself & mental toughness. If dieting & obtaining the physique & level of health you desire was an easy task, everyone would do it & be happy. I don’t know about you, but I would rather be a DOer. Goals don’t mean sh*t unless you ACT. Just like knowledge isn’t power unless there’s application. We were made to be ACTIVE participants in life.

Seeking truth & finding the answers

During therapy, she said, “I don’t feel you really have social anxiety & neither do you, I feel, & as self-aware as you are, you feel, you’re surrounded by the wrong people & always seeking truth. Why stay in circles you’ve grown out of? You already know the truth you’re seeking.”

Fxck me. She right. Does this every time.🙄🤔🤦🏼‍♀️😄

I keep it real with y’all. I don’t just post health & “fitnessey” stuff. Yes, y’all need to learn that content too, but the meat 🥩 (lol always makes me giggle 😆) of what you need work on is self healing, self love, self awareness, & bluntly put – owning your shxt. 

🔆The biggest pillars my clients & I work on.

That’s truly how you get what you want – the abundance, love, happiness, body we all dream of.

So, let me share some of my real life lessons that may just help you…

💡 The entire time you may think it’s you but what it really is is the people & environment you surround yourself is toxic & misaligned. Be choosy who you let in your circle.

💡 I will never go thru another stage of life depending on someone to take care of me, validate my worth, have to tell a man/friend/etc – how to treat me.

💡 I do not need to explain my beliefs, definitions, & choices on diet, relationships, religion, politics, or what I choose to do with my body.

💡 Never be embarrassed or ashamed of your current situation. Most people in this world are covering up the same situations with filters & fake smiles.

💡 Choose people who understand, don’t judge, & lovingly allow you to be yourself. Those people feel like sunshine, gravitate to the energy givers.

💡 Relationships truly meant for you should come easily & feel like freedom & home.  Any one you have to keep secret, force, chase, change or censor yourself – is most likely one that will end & teach you a hard lesson.

💡 The best decision I ever made was to promise myself I would have the hard conversations I didn’t want to have because those are the ones that matter. I decided hiding my words was hiding me, & they may just be the words someone else needs to here to change their life. Your message & voice matter.

How do you know you’ve found the truth to what you’re seeking?

You get to the point where you feel like your life depends on constantly research, studying, & seeking. When we’re in school, often times it does, our life trajectory depends on our studies. 

As we age I feel we more study & seek truth about life, our purpose, & who we are in general. We try to make sense of it all. I can tell you I’ve been doing this constantly my entire life.

So the question has been asked, “How do you know when you found the truth to what you’re seeking?”

👉🏻The way you know you’ve found the truth is the truth that you’re seeking is the residence of who you’ve become.

It feels like home. 

It’s easy.

It flows like water. 

You’ll hear me say be like water, you have to learn to flow like water throughout life. 

The problem is for many of us growing up we are taught the truths of all the other people & society. We’re told we have to blend & fit into all the truths. Which then feels heavy, puts many of us into a box or forces us to feel we have to slap a label on our diets, our relationships, & about who we are as humans. 

Like we have to fit in a file cabinet in exactly just the right spot or we’re tainted & to be thrown in the trash.

Blend with the loudest most powerful & most authentic truths. 

💡Ask yourself, “What if it does work out exactly how I imagined, or greater?” 

How bout we end on that note & entertain that thought?! 🌈 

High five if read all this 👋 

Peace love & meat 🥩 🔪 

Swag: @kincaidsmeatmarket @kincaidsmeatmarketfishers

Gimme your best life lessons, share with someone else below👇🏻 Love y’all ❤️

Oxox Coach K