6 Paradoxes That Will Blow Your Mind And Upgrade Your Life

6 paradoxes that will blow your mind and upgrade your life

Cleaning my apt yesterday I noticed a book. Hmm I thought…

Despite a busy schedule, I remember finishing The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck in 2 days. It was one of the 1st books that invoked shifts in my perspective on how I wanted to more authentically live my life. There were so many lessons to dissect & apply, I read the book numerous times.

I felt the urge to sit down & write about paradoxes & some counterintuitive takeaways I’ve learned & share them with you!

I feel most people’s ultimate goal in life truly is to simply “be happy.” But wtf does this really mean? I know I’ve had to ask myself this on numerous occasions while stepping off the hot mess express of life.

Happiness is a problem.
For many of us, happiness consists of relaxing on the beach while sipping our favorite cocktail 24/7. (Sounds good to me right?!) Or it may be getting healthier or losing weight. It may be getting a new job or relationship.

However, this concept couldn’t be more wrong.

Time after time, psychology has shown that human beings draw their positive feelings (happiness) often from achieving. You could picture happiness as standing on a podium holding a gold medal.

Try to recall the last time you felt joy. What was the trigger? Most often it was because you overcame a challenge & achieved something.

The “problem” I talk about is really the need for love & validation. It triggers us to do some crazy sh*t like extremes: diets, exercise, over working, people pleasing, & settling for less than we deserve.

In other words, just because a little may do great things, more doesn’t always mean better. The sweet & savory blend is found in the appropriate dose.

I actually learned to give a f*ck about the right things by giving less f*cks.

We can learn much about paradoxes which in turn can help us achieve our “happy.”

Just some things to ponder today…

  • 6 paradoxes that will blow your mind and upgrade your life

oxox Coach K

The Year I Give Up. 8 Bad Habits Preventing Your Dreams From Becoming Reality

8 bad habits preventing your dreams from becoming reality

I was staring at a terribly unflattering close-up of my face on my iPhone screen. Kinda like the terribly unflattering videos in the Target checkout line.

Staring at my iPhone, I was waiting for a client to accept our FaceTime call.

“Why the hell do reflections trigger us?” I thought.

I should have used those 10 seconds of wait time to express gratitude for this technology that allows us to connect from all over the world!

And yet all I could focus on was this red sun spot I have in the middle of my forehead & the fact my eyes looked tired af.

I moved the phone to a different angle to see if I could get a “better view.” I pulled at my eyes for an instant eye lift. I immediately started brainstorming solutions to these “imperfections.”

Was this something Botox could solve?
Would I need to invest in some kind of fancy cream or treatment?

I’m disappointed to say that all of this flashed through my mind in those 10 seconds, but I keep things on the real reel here & I’m just like you.

“Only from a place of self love do you have permission to change yourself,” I kept telling myself.
And that is what I remind myself every time the criticism Gremlin creeps in.

I understand it’s hard to break this cycle of self-critique. Especially when you’ve experienced trauma like being made fun of as a kid or raised in an environment where achieving & people pleasing were the only ways you felt you could receive love.

I realized years ago I needed to break these bad habits & started practicing daily gratitude & being present in my body as it was.

If you ask me today what my top beauty advice would be, I would say this…

Look in the mirror less, obsess less about things that don’t add true value to your life & look at the rest of the world to see what you could be using your time for instead.

I now use my extra time for growth & nourishment in the forms of education, service, money, personal development, health, self care, & making memories with loved ones.

I decided 2023 would be the year I give up. The year I nourish.

I owe it to myself, to you, to my dreams, & to the legacy I want to leave here that doesn’t have a damn thing to do with a red sunspot on my forehead.

Cheers to 2023 – the year I. Give. Up.

Swipe, save & share if this resonates with you!

  • 8 bad habits preventing your dreams from becoming reality

oxox Coach K

How I Plan to Make 2023 my Best Year Yet Using This 8 Step Success Formula

I listened to a podcast by Jay Shetty last week that invoked the most enriching reflection on my year I’ve ever had. ⁣

Every year I spend time getting a clear insight of how this year went, the ups & downs, the special moments, & the things I might want to do away or restart next year.⁣

This year I asked myself 7 questions suggested on that podcast. I included them on the last slide for you!⁣

These would be a great idea for a date night, community group, or a night out with friends!⁣

And here’s a challenge for you, REALLY get to know people this next year.⁣

I feel we get so wrapped up in superficial 2 second reels & TikTok’s that we’ve forgotten about depth & real life sh*t. ⁣

I’m over the swipe right or left society we got goin on here. How bout you? 🙄⁣

Anywhoodle…to help you start somewhere, here is a synopsis of the success formula I’m using to make 2023 my best yet!⁣

Lots of life lesson gems 💎 in the one!⁣

Gimme a 🔥 of you’re ready to have your best year!⁣

Oxox Coach K⁣

Three Life Lessons I Learned From A Terminally Ill Man That Started With A Pick Up Line

Three Life Lessons I Learned From A Terminally Ill Man That Started With A Pick Up Line girl pink scrubs

One of the best lines I’ve ever heard was delivered to me by a terminally ill man. He knew I was looking for something more, more specifically something within myself. Guess I looked like I needed a laugh!

I was working in patient access as a phlebotomist & registration right out of college (Which I LOVED!). I didn’t know if I needed to go back to school, I was unhappily married & more so unhappy with myself, physically & mentally.

He said, “I hope you know CPR, because you just took my breath away! So, aside from taking my breath away, what do you like to do?”

I laughed, “Self sabotage, apparently.”

He passed away from lung cancer a few months later. He was one of many people I got to know (& lose) in my time working in healthcare.

The message I want to share with all of you is just a short synopsis of the golden nuggets he shared with me.

He said, “Being close to fear & death, in many ways, taught me to live. Successful & happy people don’t self-sabotage. They quietly quit the past. So what is it you need to let go of? What lights you up & fills you with purpose & fulfillment? That’s your answer to making changes to live your heaven everyday.”

It wasn’t a transformation overnight but decades of making different decisions & shifting my perspective because of that one conversation.

I went to radiology school. I started doing sh*t I loved. I started slowly forgiving & loving myself. I started releasing people & habits that didn’t serve (which meant a divorce years later). It meant changing numerous jobs, failed relationships, & trying on a multitude of hats in every facet of life over my 40 years.
And I continue evolving, trying on new hats, & making mistakes, too.

3 lessons that I took from this gentleman:

  1. Life (& the world) is a malfunctioning machine, the more pissed off we let ourselves become about it, the more likely we are to crash. Try again.
  2. Happiness is not a consumable product or end goal. It is not something you find by searching or achieving. It is an arising byproduct of a fulfilling, well-lived life.
  3. A well-lived life has more to do with perspective than anything else. As long as you can evolve & laugh, there is hope.

oxox Coach K

bio carnivore lilbitoffit katie kelly indiana fishers
Hailing from Fishers, Indiana, Katie is an aficionado of health, mindset, human connection, & entrepreneurship. Motivational writer, speaker, doer of many things, she grew up on her family’s beef cattle & crop farm where agriculture was her first love. She is a Purdue University graduate well known for her storytelling of life lessons & personal transformation through her own relationships, financial struggles, Crohn’s Disease, disordered eating, CrossFit, & adapting a carnivore diet lifestyle.

Katie also has over 17 years experience as a Registered Radiologic Technologist, Nutritionist, & Sales Consultant. She works with people of all walks of life as a nutritionist & personal life coach to help them authentically optimize their lives to find health, wealth, & happy!

You can catch her via Instagram @lil_bit_of_fit & blog, Lilbitoffit.com

http://www.instagram.com/lil_bit_of_fit

Confessions of a Saturday morning shameless selfie…

Daily confessions of a shameless morning selfie…⁣

In case you needed the reminder, it’s OK to be sorta sweet, sorta Beth Dutton🤚🥃⁣

Yellowstone. Dudes I love this show.⁣

I have not been so obsessed with a show since Grey’s Anatomy, One Tree Hill, & Sex & the City.⁣

To my new followers you’ll find I talk about all kinds of real life sh*t on here. Love, food, relationships, money, fitness – they’re all connected.⁣

If you meet me in person I want you to be able to say, “You’re just like you are on social media!” Because that’s how it should be.⁣

Some personal things about me…⁣

I’m not naturally “feminine” per se. It’s a skill I’ve had to develop.⁣
4 words: Bull in China Shop🐮⁣

As I aged I noticed how trauma affected the balance of my masculine & feminine energy.⁣
👉Trauma from from being made fun of as an overweight kid⁣
👉feeling I had to achieve to be loved⁣
👉or being liked simply for my looks & not the totality of all that I am⁣
The list could go on…⁣

I emotionally disconnected, became avoidant, & flirted more on the line of masculinity rather than embrace my femininity.⁣
✅Thank you therapy.⁣

My therapist asked me about my sex life. “Do you like to be the more dominant one?” (felt like I needed a shot of tequila at this point😂)⁣

I guess I never noticed how rough around the edges I was until a boyfriend criticized me for slammin cabinet doors. He’d yell at me.⁣
I said we’ll maybe you’re just fragile🤷‍♀️😆 Obviously💁🏼‍♀️that relationship ended.⁣

It made me wanna change myself because I thought, well, there’s something wrong with me.⁣
I changed for him & that cycle of losing myself in relationships continued for years.⁣

I’m grateful for every single piece of 50 shades of fxcked up that makes me — ME. ⁣

One of the best decisions you’ll ever make is to invest in therapy & always be seeking to be a better version of yourself.⁣

Tell yourself today👉you weren’t made to fit in, you were made to move mountains🏔 ⁣

Oxox Coach K #saturdaymorning #butfirstcoffee

How I managed my energy to create a happier, healthier life by doing these 8 things brilliantly

I used to smash Bangs ⚡️ like it was my job.  Coffees & energy drinks were temporary solutions. Which initially gives us some energy but after a while, we feel tired again.⁣

Let’s not forget the havoc it plays on our adrenals, inflammation, hormones, digestion, etc. 😔 ⁣

Feelings of tiredness are so common that many times we just sit on the couch watching TV, unable to do anything else. It makes us feel like a watered down version of ourselves.⁣

We have everything.⁣
Modern man has everything: a computer, internet access, which gives him the opportunity to communicate with people around the world. A car to get to work faster, a gym membership, & plenty of food.⁣

We know everything.⁣
We all know that we need to watch less TV, eat less junk food, move more, & read more books.⁣

But we do nothing.⁣
Most will deny this. Try to remember the times when you bought brand-new sports equipment or a gym membership or vowed to start your diet on Monday. Did you? Why?⁣

Most often because of lack of energy, purpose, fulfillment, time management, & discipline 🤷‍♀️ ⁣

So let’s promise ourselves positive change & continue to crush this week! Swipe, save & share: How I stopped being tired & started living by doing these 8 things brilliantly!⁣

Gimme an🦾 if you’re ready to make this your best life yet!⁣

oxox Coach K⁣

Healthier & Younger After 40: Secrets To A Sexy Life

Healthier & younger after 40: Secrets to a sexy life

You are where you are in life because you choose to be there.
Face the truth.

On some level, you feel like you deserve to be where you’re at in life, even if you don’t like your life. I’ve been there.

If you’re getting paid “less than you’re worth,” it’s because you’re not getting paid less than you’re worth. If you agree to a certain wage, you literally accept that wage as what you’re worth.

If you keep people in your life who don’t treat you well, you’re keeping them there because you have low self-worth. After all, if your self-worth was high you wouldn’t allow people to treat you that way.

The secret to a sexy life? Well, it’s not exactly what I thought it would be. It’s actually in doing the “unsexy” the majority of the time.

You see I figured out that “life” truly happens in the interlude & inbetweens.

I don’t know about y’all, but the last 4 years of my life have been UNREAL.

I went from being broke af, single af, sick af, lonely af, lost af
to
abundant af, healthy af, happy af, to married af, to divorced & single af again & everything in between!

That’s only a percentage of the roller coaster ride that strangers I meet & write for find delight in listening to.

My “regular” daily life?

Workout. Work. Write. Create. Read. Learn, Sleep. Repeat.

I found by walking the line of structure & spontaneity, that THAT in between was the secret sauce to finding the sexy life.

For me, the only way to facilitate such sweet serendipity was to keep leveling myself up in life — unlocking access to richer experiences, better health, & deeper people. That meant cultivating upleveling habits, environments, mindset, & goals.

So, if you’re puffing cig after cig before getting drunk at the local bar every night the only “serendipity” you might unlock is a clumsy, dumpster fire make-out sesh with someone with more baggage than a trash truck & a hangover the next day.

Swipe, save, & share: Healthier & Younger After 40: Secrets To A Sexy Life.

  • Healthier & younger after 40: Secrets to a sexy life

oxox Coach K

bio carnivore lilbitoffit katie kelly indiana fishers
Hailing from Fishers, Indiana, Katie is an aficionado of health, mindset, human connection, & entrepreneurship. Motivational writer, speaker, doer of many things, she grew up on her family’s beef cattle & crop farm where agriculture was her first love. She is a Purdue University graduate well known for her storytelling of life lessons & personal transformation through her own relationships, financial struggles, Crohn’s Disease, disordered eating, CrossFit, & adapting a carnivore diet lifestyle.

Katie also has over 17 years experience as a Registered Radiologic Technologist, Nutritionist, & Sales Consultant. She works with people of all walks of life as a nutritionist & personal life coach to help them authentically optimize their lives to find health, wealth, & happy!

You can catch her via Instagram @lil_bit_of_fit & blog, Lilbitoffit.com

http://www.instagram.com/lil_bit_of_fit

“I’ll start my diet Monday” Why it’s not working & tips to help

A sobering & reflective conversation…⁣

Emotion is energy in motion. Dieting is an emotional problem, it’s more about behavior than food.⁣

Nothing happens if nothing moves. So I ask you, “Where is your emotion driving you?”⁣

Hard truths & guidelines to help you push the restart button for the last time. 🔖⁣

Do you refuse to rest? Refuse to give up addictions? Refuse to reverse diet & STOP chronically dieting? Do you refuse to simply put in the work it requires to change your body, health, & life?⁣

Y’all, basically what you’re saying here is, “I want this, but I don’t it bad enough to do what is required to achieve it.” ⁣

Biggies: ⁣
“I can’t cut back on workouts.” (even though they’re stressing my body out even more which is actually hindering progress)⁣

“I can’t give up my coffee/bangs/etc.” (even though my cortisol is jacked up thru the roof & I can’t sleep at night)⁣

“I can’t give up sweets & snacking at night.” (even though they’re causing inflammation, gut problems, high glucose, fat gain, & more cravings)⁣

“I can’t reverse diet because I’ll gain weight.” (even though you’ve been eating less than a toddler for 20+ yrs & still don’t have the health or body you want)⁣

Sound familiar?⁣

I share these things because I love y’all and I’ve made all the same mistakes as you! ⁣

It’s Sunday night, let’s freaking rock this week! Here are some tips to help, take what you need!⁣

Oxox Coach “your biggest cheerleader” K 📣⁣


21 Cheat Codes I Wished I Knew At 21

There’s someone right now living & loving their life with less than you.⁣

They are living & loving their life the same weight, body size, body fat, relationship status, health condition, job, financial status & more, as you.⁣

External factors aren’t what make you unhappy, you do. It’s the perception of life & the thoughts in your head. You aren’t your thoughts but you do choose to listen to them.⁣

No more, “I’ll be happy when…”⁣

Cheat codes I wished I had learned earlier.⁣

Which one do you resonate most with?⁣

Happy Saturday family! I love you!⁣

Oxox Coach K⁣



Read this If you feel the need to shrink yourself

My therapist told me one time, “If you feel the need to constantly try & shrink yourself mentally & physically, maybe you should think about walking into a bigger room.”⁣⁣
⁣⁣
Oof. You feel that one right?!⁣⁣
Drop a ❤️ if you needed that too.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
I took that advice & applied it to every facet of my life & fitness.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
I realized I didn’t REALLY wanna be or look like other people. I was searching for worth outside of myself because I was lost.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
I remember the night I took a sip of bourbon & told myself, “Sis, it’s time to retire the insecure you, the chronically sad you, the you who chases & changes herself, the you who feels like she’s too much & not enough at the same time.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
It’s time to stop letting your past haunt & define you & start creating the most awesome, highest value version of yourself. It’s time to manifest the highest alignment vision of the kind of woman, body, fulfillment, & relationships you deserve & desire.”⁣⁣
⁣⁣
I journaled qualities of the high value woman I wanted to be & that moment changed the game…⁣⁣
⁣⁣
♥️She lives by the 4 agreements:⁣⁣
Be impeccable with your word, always do your best, don’t take anything personally, don’t make assumptions.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
♥️She loves herself above all because she knows if she loves herself she can move mountains & love others fully.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
♥️She takes care of herself mentally, physically, financially, & spiritually. She does not chase, she magnetizes.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
♥️She knows she can only be beautiful like her. She knows that if she wants to look & feel a certain way like her, she has to be willing to TAKE ACTION like her, be DISCIPLINED like her, have A MINDSET like her, show up CONFIDENTLY like her, & LOVE herself like her.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
♥️She is clear on what she wants in a partner & embodies what she wants to attract. Her relationships are ADDITIVE to her life, not all-consuming & she only engages in reciprocal relationships.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
♥️She believes that anything is possible, life is always extraordinary, passionate/healthy love exists, & she’s willing to wait for what she wants because Queens don’t settle like dust in the wind.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
Oxox Coach K⁣⁣

Scrubs: @wearfigs Hair: @the.burgundy @megan.theburgundy